Dwayne Russell

[Jara 1,149]

Hey Clint

Lovely of you to give him his own thread.

Utter moron, most annoying commentator around. As others said, his trouble is he just doesn't realise how stupid he is. He was one of the chorus leaders at the time of the tanking debacle.

And the name. Is there a worse male name? It's like his parents had a discussion along the lines of: hmmm, this is a really dumb looking baby. What's the most appropriate name we can give it? How about Wayne? No, that doesn't capture the sublime stupidity of this baby. I know - let's stick a "der" in front of it.

Late thought - sorry if this sounds disrespectful to any Demonlanders called Dwayne. I'm sure you wear it well. I have a rather unfortunate First name myself.

Edited June 21, 2015 by Jara

[dee-luded 2,958]

Dwayne is hard to listen to at the best of times, his love of Port Adelaide and Geelong is equal only to his hatred of Melbourne.

Today, you could hear the tears rolling down his cheeks and the croak in his voice with every Melbourne goal got louder and louder. After Garlett kicked one of his many goals he proclaimed "dagger to the heart!" He was of course referring to himself.

Well Dwayne, to show there are no hard feelings despite all this I will be sending you a small gift in the mail.

something he can chew on, next time he feels the need to open his mouth, to Gob off.

suck on it der-waayne

[P-man 13,276]

his trouble is he just doesn't realise how stupid he is.

This sums him up perfectly.

[Forest Demon 4,681]

Just saw a tweet from Jesse Hogan along the lines of "our captain has a fair bit of spirit too fox footy", obviously also getting the shits at Dwayne and friends.

[Swooper Northey 277]

He's a complete and utter tool. So arrogant. I refuse to listen to 3AW Sports Today for that reason.

[Tony Tea 2,792]

Dwanker.

[Rod Grinter Riot Squad 5,636]

What's the story there RGRS?

from memory a poster's Mum, a dog's fan, wrote to him about his bias a long time ago. He responded, in a ridiculously condescending manner

[titan_uranus 22,725]

The worst commentator there is.

At least BT knows he's an idiot, and puts it on. Russell thinks he's decent.

He has a bunch of cliches he throws out weekly, and is so utterly biased against us (and probably another one or two 'weak' clubs as well). But worst of all, he's just a pathetic commentator. Makes watching the game difficult.

[Nasher 33,161]

The poster child for the amateurish state of the way our game is covered.

[monoccular 16,326]

One typical example of his idiocy, was in the third quarter 2:42 to go "Gawn, tackled by Rivers...turnover..." Yet he actually handballs to ANB who goals !!

I was going to say, 'what is he thinking', but I should say, 'what, is he thinking?'

[dazzledavey36 49,150]

Sandy Roberts is out of touch with todays game.

Cant even get the players name right half the time.

[Straight Sets Simon 23,113]

And the name. Is there a worse male name? It's like his parents had a discussion along the lines of: hmmm, this is a really dumb looking baby. What's the most appropriate name we can give him? How about Wayne? No, that doesn't capture the stupidity of this baby. I know - let's stick a "der" in front of it.

This made me laugh.

[Je Roos Salem 661]

Was today's game a "Miracle on grass"?

[Binmans PA 26,376]

Am watching the taped telecast now. Hate Russell with a passion. Looking forward to listening to him in the last quarter. Glad I was at the game and didn't have to listen to the [censored].

[Demon Disciple 11,089]

I was going to say, 'what is he thinking', but I should say, 'what, is he thinking?'

If he was reading that Mono, he wouldn't have a clue trying to differentiate them!

[Roger Mellie 3,577]

I consider it a plus that he didn't belt out his cringeworthy catch cry "Baby"

Epic tool

[P-man 13,276]

Sandy Roberts is out of touch with todays game.

Cant even get the players name right half the time.

You gotta love the way Toump-ass plays. To everyone else he's Toumpas. To Sandy, he's Toump-ASS.

But he's still a million times more tolerable than Dwayne.

[dee-luded 2,958]

He's a complete and utter tool. So arrogant. I refuse to listen to 3AW Sports Today for that reason.

does 3AW still do footy after all these years? I wouldn't, no.

anyhow abc does...

[McQueen 17,864]

Always good for laugh.

Dwayne Russell (born March 4, 1965) is a very ordinary former Australian rules footballer and currently an even more ordinary commentator of the sport. He played for the Port Adelaide Football Club in the SANFL, before crossing over to VFL club Geelong in 1987. He played 50 games for 51 goals until he was removed from the club in 1991 for trying to pass himself off as Gary Ablett's younger, better looking, but less talented brother at Geelong Nightclubs. Following his retirement he was meant to be the captain-coach of Colac- Coragulac for 1992. However, he appeared at only two training sessions, collecting the $30,000 dollars to undertake the role. On the eve of his first match, he quit his position when he discovered that the Colac-Coragulac Football Club had not installed a solarium in the team rooms, as per his persistent requests. The job later went to Michael Roberts, whom pundits had always considered to have a far greater tactical nous and grasp of the game than Russell in the Cheese and Milk Factory, Mister. Category A, B and minus C.

http://www.bigfooty.com/forum/threads/dwayne-russell-nails-on-a-blackboard.452322/

[dee-eee 231]

A cocky lightweight with an appalling propensity to suck-up to the supporters of the "big" teams . A couple of years ago, as GWS was enduring its then regular drubbing, he shouted to his radio audience : " This is beautiful , Collingwood , The Grandest of the Grand Old Teams " .

[Guest]

I said a long time ago on this newsagents l message board; I will never forget all the flogs like Basil (Melbourne know their role . They're the Washington Generals!) Zempilas, Kevin (I'm going to poach Jack Viney just like Tom Scully) Sheedy and Dwayne Russell when we finally come good. They will not be allowed to claim they were always believers when the day finally comes.

Edited June 22, 2015 by Colin B. Flaubert

[titan_uranus 22,725]

Sandy Roberts is out of touch with todays game.

Cant even get the players name right half the time.

He's tolerable, unlike Dwayne Russell, but I agree, he's also hopeless (he makes so many mistakes with player names, or he doesn't know who it is so doesn't give the player a name).

[PartyBoy 173]

The amount of Ex Footballers turned "expert" commentators is alarming.

Queens Birthday Match:

Example 1.

Players walking to position -

Tim Watson "Jetta going to Elliot, that's surprising. I thought Garlett would have."

Example 2

Brayshaw avoids Varcoe and kicks a goal on none preferred.

Nick Maxwell "Varcoe needs to be better there, he should have known Brayshaw was a left footer"

'On the couch' has been ruined by Brown and Dunstall. The viewer wants to be educated with strong & controversial views. Rather than "back in my day Jase"

In saying that, I'm looking forward to watching them all tonight.

[rjay 23,995]

You gotta love the way Toump-ass plays. To everyone else he's Toumpas. To Sandy, he's Toump-ASS.

But he's still a million times more tolerable than Dwayne.

The big diff with Sandy is he doesn't take himself seriously like Dwayne does.

I remember watching Dwayne playing for Port where he reminded me of a looks like Tarzan plays like Jane type with an incredible ego pumped up by the Port faithful.

Just looked like a pompous lightweight full of his own importance, strutting around like a peacock. Commentates the same way.

Now...do you want me to tell you what I really think of him?

[Ethan Tremblay 28,488]

My favourite was during the first qtr "This contest could go one of two ways."