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Sorry, but you must be joking.

Piggy is one of the better analysts and I think he has a case; let's not get carried away by the NAB Challenge. We're improving, no doubt, and we've got plenty of grunt but we still butcher the ball too much and the top teams will make us pay time and again. Brisbane were undefeated in last years NAB challenge and look how that turned out....

I don't think you can pass for 14 anymore Dazzle. Especially with the beard.

I got drunk.

I went to Crazyburn with Bitters last week and he got in as a child whilst carrying a six pack of VB stubbies and a bottle of Beam. Anythings possible biff.

I didn't see it, but it is worth one game.

Nope, 2nd 1. Fremantle Dockers 3 3 0 0 242:168 144.05 12 2. Melbourne Demons 3 3 0 0 274:219 125.11 12 3. Collingwood Magpies 3 3 0 0 323:305 105.90 12 4. Adelaide Crows 3 2 0 1 324:201 161.19 8 5. Greater Western Sydney 3 2 0 1 289:247 117.00 8 6. Sydney Swans 3 2 0 1 232:223 104.04 8 7. West Coast Eagles 3 2 0 1 261:253 103.16 8 8. Hawthorn Hawks 3 2 0 1 211:216 97.69 8 9. Geelong Cats 3 1 0 2 305:238 128.15 4 10. Western Bulldogs 3 1 0 2 269:252 106.75 4 11. Port Adelaide Power 3 1 0 2 229:221 103.62 4 12. Gold Coast Suns 3 1 0 2 204:207 98.55 4 13. North Melbourne Kangaroos 3 1 0 2 274:283 96.82 4 14. Richmond Tigers 3 1 0 2 179:216 82.87 4 15. Essendon Bombers 3 1 0 2 172:304 56.58 4 16. St Kilda Saints 2 0 0 2 156:224 69.64 0 17. Brisbane Lions 2 0 0 2 126:190 66.32 0 18. Carlton Blues 3 0 0 3 136:239 56.90 0 People say the NAB is meaningless but there is no denying there is a great deal of similarity between this ladder and what is expected to happen this year. If you moved WCE and Hawthorn towards the top, Richmond to 9th, there isn't too much out of place IMO Except of course us!

Also worth bearing in mind we had no VDB, Brayshaw, Dunn, Lumumba, Trengove, Petracca or Dawes, and 22 vs 24, against a side at full strength which most "pundits" think are certainties to be better than us this year. At Etihad, against an Etihad-based side. Only a practice match, but a result to be happy with at any rate.

Tyson sums it perfectly: http://www.melbournefc.com.au/news/2016-03-13/we-achieved-what-we-wanted-tyson -The midfielder said Melbourne’s good form had come off the back of strong contributions across the board. -“We’re just getting a nice, even contribution,” he said -“We’re sharing the load and playing pretty well as a group of 22 on the field at the moment. -“I guess everywhere you look at the moment you’ve got confidence, which is a good feeling to have.” In a word: TEAMWORK

What an absurd thread. GWS have a more talented, deeper and stronger list than us. Does it mean we can't beat them on the day at our home ground? No. But to suggest they're average is simply moronic.

His first half was very poor, but he found his feet a little more as the game went on. I think Lumumba will come straight in for Round 1 though.

Every single day I get down on my knees and thank every deity ever created that Mick Malthouse let Jeffy Garlett go for a bag of peanuts.

Being conservative we should be 12-0.

He's alright I spose.

I thought we were quite ordinary apart from the few obvious standouts. This isn't a negative comment, I think it's been a theme of the NAB cup, a lot of teams have looked ordinary but all kicked high scores. When was the last time we did that? Biggest positive was running it out so easily, I've seen teams struggle this round in the final quarter, we did it as good if not easier than anyone. Being in front in the last quarter with the interchange cap is going to be hugely important I feel. Hogan better sign up now or he'll have to settle for decoy wages supporting Watts.

It's nice sitting back watching Essenscum being towelled up for afters.

After today's display I don't think Sandy would even know who he supports.

Kennedy and Oliver have cemented their spots for Round 1. It turns out Kennedy can kick, already like him more than Howe. We all love Oliver but how good was his handpass to Salem in the last quarter. You can't teach that.

We're back after a forum meltdown.

Looked like cramp. Can we hold the 'injury' calls until we know more. Each time a player grimaces everyone is jumping on to claim they're injured.

Just getting boozed up in my hotel's bar prior to decamping to the penthouse for the game. I want to see Hogan get on the scoreboard and jack Watts back up last week's effort. Jones and Vince should be better for the run. I'm also looking for another solid performance from Pedomyths and , after seeing him at Crazyburn, I'm looking forward to some more muscle from Oliver

This is the game day thread right?

The kid is a star! Quick, evasive, always keeps his feet, knows when to go for the grab and when to stay on the ground for the crumb, excellent acceleration, can turn on a dime, rarely (if ever) fumbles, elite goal sense, elite forward pressure, great field kick, great football brain, can be used for short bursts in the middle to get effect, can quickly turn with a few quick k goals with ease. 40 goals in 2015. 25 years old with many more classy years left in him. Cost us pick 61 FGS!! Lol thanks for this beautiful gift Mick.

There is a resistance to run the ball up the wing using the boundary as defence. Instead they are switching out of defence and running the ball by hand and foot through the corridor as well as the opposite wing. When it works they look a million dollars but they were undone several times with bad kicks at point of instigation. They are soooo much better than last year and look like a really competent team.

Please translate this to English or Italian. I think it might be worth reading.

I don't mean to be a downer, but i think Wagner is still a little way off where he needs to be for AFL level

Best game Jack Watts has played in red and blue..

Wow did you hear Gerard Healy make excuses for the saints. Not their best team? Riewoldt injured...late? Only play two nab challenge games? Give me a break....

I am not watching the game but some of the things I am reading in regards to Oscar Mac and Wagner here are a bit tough. The blokes arent 50 game or even 10 game players at AFL level, for a team who has spent the last 10 years near the bottom of the table I think some of us supporters are expecting these kids to be Chris Judds straight off the bat. On the flip side...Great to see Kennedy, Bugg, and Oliver securing themselves for round 1. Throw in Dunn, H, Brayshaw, VDB, and (Hopefully he is true to his hype) Petracca there and we have quite the handy team!

So many reactionary flogs live here. They make concrete conclusions on the back of one moment of play. Watts is becoming really important and I couldn't be happier. And no, the bet isn't with Jumbo and I hope I lose.

Just sat down at my local. Recently moved so had to cancel Foxtel. Instead of $130+ (monthly) to watch beloved Demons only cost couple bucks for pot, the place is empty and 50inch tv to myself ☺☺☺ Back to the footy... strap urself in for 2016

bugg - kennedy - oliver GOAL. awesome.

Settle down guys. You can see what we are trying to do - when it works its been great, but we need to cop a few turnovers as we get better at it. That's life.

Wonder if Hoges wants to rethink his contract situation?

I support all of this.

Have watched the replay a couple of times and all I can say is... GONE! Chose to leave the ground... Bumped him high and contact to the head... Regardless of GWS being the love child of the AFL it is a no brainer! At least a week! You beauty!

WooHoo - Jeremy Cameron reported

'Checker' Hughes gets the nod from me. By the length of Flemington straight. I admired Northey, he was great for this club. He followed Barassi, after Barassi got the joint back in order, and in typical Barassi style, he demanded standards were met or you were out the door. If anyone thought Ronald Dale was tough. Coaching the MFC reserves was a little bloke by the name of Ray "slug" Jordan. Whom I had the great pleasure, of standing about 6 feet away, when 'slug' ripped into a player, and used just about every expletive in the book to get his point across. For a little bloke, he would have been heard 2 blocks away. This was just a practice game, at a local football ground (Might add, women and children close by) Between the 2 them, there wouldn't be any compromises.Slug was probably only 2nd to Denis Pagan for success in coaching reserve teams. Enter Northey. (After the ground rules had been set) Coached from 1985 to 1998 Coached 4 teams : Sydney, Melbourne, Richmond and Brisbane Bears Coached MFC from 1986 until 1992 Won 90 Lost 76 Played in 1 Grand Final - Lost. I am still of the belief we should have won at least 1 or perhaps 2 flags in that time. Frank "Checker' Hughes Coached from 1927 to 1948 *1965 doesnt count as he stood in as temp for 1 game for some bloke that got the sack* Coached 2 teams : Richmond 1927 to 1932 5 Grand Finals won 1 flag Melbourne 1933 to 1948 6 Grand Finals (including a drawn GF) won 4 Total Games = won 244 lost 129 Now between 1939 to 1945 (2nd WW) the MFC lost a handful of the their star players, some never to return to wear a Red and Blue jumper. One can only guess how many more Grand Final wins could have been added if not for the fact the war disrupted our run of success. Then he had to rebuild a team, Lost the 1946 GF and won another in 1948. I'll throw in, just for good measure, he was coaching against the Great "Jock" McHale (Collingwood) You can add in the influence he had on a young Norm Smith.As well as the insight to giving us our Nickname of the Demons. "Checker" gets my vote.Someone will need to come up with a bloody good argruement to convince me otherwise.

Having seen Liam Hulett in his first practice game at Casey yesterday, I think he might be in line for a Sam Gray but let me temper that by saying it will be a long, long way into the future if it happens at all. Both he and Sam Weideman were playing their first games at senior level after missing a lot of football through injury (and I'm discounting any suburban senior games Hulett might have played last year in the Mornington Peninsula comp). They both found it hard to get into the game because the Scorps were basically a rabble against a well oiled, highly disciplined team that ran rings around them. They need time to acclimatise at this level before any thought can be given to their AFL careers and they will do better in time. Hulett is a really big bodied lad who looks physically ready but he's actually a long way from that in terms of learning and experience and I suspect that he needs the full year of fitness training including gym work and learning running patterns etc out on the ground before we can even know whether he can take the step to the next level. His size is an advantage and a disadvantage at the same time. He's a definite work in progress and if the development coaches at the club do their work well, he could become an imposing presence on a football field.

I'm just waiting for Sandy to call Garlett 'Austin Wonaemirri' so we can finally put him out to pasture. He is still better than Der-wayne though.

First half ponderings. I'm enjoying the stylings of Max Gawn, Jack Watts, Neville Jetta, Jeff Garlett and Clarrie. No idea how we're winning with our midfield being so bad so far. Tyson, Hogan and Wagner couldn't play worse games if they tried. Tom has been good, but that [censored] turn over... Take out O'mac and put in Dunn and the Saints would not have got 4 of those goals. Now, how the [censored], does Sandy Roberts have a job? So far he's called Jetta Salem, Wagner Tyson, Harmes Oliver, Nathan Jones Nathan Brown... Just embarrassing.

Anyone still doubt that Ollie has earned a start round 1?

"He's excited a lot of people at Demonland". Why, yes.

i completely disagree. their midfield is super deep and mumford remains one of the top three ruckmen that maximus gawnius wants to surpass alongside goldzilla and our old mate stef.

I hope Tmac tidies his game up from last week.

You're being too hard on yourself Satyriconhome. I don't think anybody is going to accuse you of being clever.

Was worth a crack.

Exactly what I was thinking. Sharapova was careless at best but the tennis world swiftly circled its protective ring like a wagon train under attack from Indians. Very reminiscent of the way the EFC and the blokey types within the AFL (like Sammy Newman) got around Hird and the Bombers. In the end, it doesn't matter if the gear is Mexican, Latvian, Chinese or made here, if it's a banned performance enhancing substance, it has to be stamped out and those who use it, wittingly or unwittingly, deserve to be punished. The question has also been raised that the Sharapova camp knew meldonium was performance enhancing but took it ostensibly for medicinal purposes and got away with it for ten years. If that's the case, and how do you prove it, she was being unethical and immoral and doing "whatever it takes" as James Hird would no doubt say. That's why WADA will always have the job ahead of it.

They're taking the píss with Essendon.