The No T$ No B$ Thread

[hemingway 7,589]

12 hours ago, Biffen said:

This IS my rehab and detox program Hem.

 

of course Biff, my comments were of course tongue in cheek. 

i know that you need sustenance and support given the perilous position of the Gat. 

but you reach a point in your life where you need to learn moderation in all things and seek nourishment of the soul. 

[bjDee 1,247]

On 14/02/2017 at 10:53 AM, hemingway said:

of course Biff, my comments were of course tongue in cheek. 

i know that you need sustenance and support given the perilous position of the Gat. 

but you reach a point in your life where you need to learn moderation in all things and seek nourishment of the soul. 

Hem, I suspect that Biff, along with many of us, are still in the phase of: "nourishment from all things (as much as you can get), and moderation of the soul". 

[daisycutter 28,547]

i see uncle bitters popped up yesterday (or friday?) then seems to have disappeared

don't tell me he is on rehab again already. has he got schwartzitis?

[Biffen 12,327]

Dear Friends and Copious Admirers,

I have been waylaid with my overnight success as a Karaoke performer and so have not been able to regale you with my ever increasing popularity.

I know many of you find yourself miserable at The Donalds' unqualified brilliance but not I ,as a planned trip to Vietnam by the big Red  could see me well placed as a sort of cultural attache ,a job you will all agree i am well suited to .

My trades have all gone well and a recent visit to the golden triangle should be able to quieten down the Gat for the rest of the year( which should keep the interloping bogan nouveau ,nimby types happy ,if they know what's good for them.) Quiet that is, apart from the sporadic wailing of Ambulance sirens delivering the odd counter balance to Biffs finest!! As I always say, being clinically dead for a few minutes never hurt anyone.A change over of guests at the Gat is always refreshing and good for bizz.

Not  normally being one for wedding cake , the humidity and liquor must have taken a toll upon me as I have found myself at the altar at least three times in the past week that i can recall..So far have managed to not let the left hand know what the right hand is doing if you get my drift.

Thankfully the divorce lawyers are not quite as cluey as the ones back home with regards to asset confiscation ,which ,lets face it, is the main reason for most divorces.Combined with uniquely feminine spite  naturally.

Speaking of the unspeakable,I was reading Clementine Fords very important article on Wicked Campers today ,or at least that was the initial subject .She digressed into sexual slavery,Sid James' prolific contributions to the arts and other unrelated  topics as well.Cracking read although I'm not sure if she was serious.Let's hope the Age doesn't pay her as much as the non-fluff piece writers.She must have a hubby to support her trifling hobbies.

I also noticed that the  hunchback of Spring Street is about to attempt to pass some thought crime legislation on what one can and cannot say.I wonder if he has ever sat with the union lads for a few beers and heard their thoughts on race relations,chinese labour,Italian concreters,greek developers or the like.He would surely blush if so.But I doubt he would press any charges.

Anyhow, as I've said, the Age ain't what she used to be and if it's a guide to the happiness of Batmania then we are all doomed.A return to the halcyon days of the red and blue could be the only tonic.

Speaking of tonic-it's liquid gold here and the philistines keep drinking mine.Next time i will have to get a sponsorship from Schweppes to keep me tootling along.

Good to see we beat the reigning premiers although I've not had time to witness the match, the reports on Demonland have kept me in the picture .23-1 for the flag in todays markets.Worth a shy at the stumps I would think.

Anyhow,It's time for me to discipline he staff ,which is one task I refuse to outsource.Nothing like the personal touch in matters of crime and punishment.

Please cope without me as best you can although by the tone and state of this thread it seems you are rudderless.

Perhaps if Bitters could drag himself out of his neighbours' cellar and boudoir you might rally behind his much needed leadership.

Just a thought.

Toodlepip for now.

 

 

 

[Bitter but optimistic 21,254]

Your good Old Uncle Bitter is back!!

Just in time it seems, as this off course thread appears to be well off course, of course.

Yes, I did another short stretch in rehab and, as a result, have spent some time in necessary  convalescence. The  good Doctor  Hopping Dick applied the electrodes every meal time while I was force fed fried rice. Subsequently I cant walk past a Chinese take away without twitching and sobbing uncontrollably.

The whole sorry business has impacted on my private life. My aim is now unsteady and my role as chief flogger is under threat.

I am appalled that the oafish Biffen is wreaking havoc in the Asian Colonies. I may have to make a mercy dash over there to restore proper relationships.

For the moment be aware that I am watching and will make any necessary interventions to restore this thread to its improper level of interlectual  smartness.

[special robert 438]

Are you going to Casey UB? Would you be able to pick me up? I camp under the freeway at the bottom of Spencer St.

[old dee 22,854]

2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Your good Old Uncle Bitter is back!!

Just in time it seems, as this off course thread appears to be well off course, of course.

Yes, I did another short stretch in rehab and, as a result, have spent some time in necessary  convalescence. The  good Doctor  Hopping Dick applied the electrodes every meal time while I was force fed fried rice. Subsequently I cant walk past a Chinese take away without twitching and sobbing uncontrollably.

The whole sorry business has impacted on my private life. My aim is now unsteady and my role as chief flogger is under threat.

I am appalled that the oafish Biffen is wreaking havoc in the Asian Colonies. I may have to make a mercy dash over there to restore proper relationships.

For the moment be aware that I am watching and will make any necessary interventions to restore this thread to its improper level of interlectual  smartness.

Oh thank God you are back Bbo demonland has not been the same without you.

[Bitter but optimistic 21,254]

2 hours ago, special robert said:

Are you going to Casey UB? Would you be able to pick me up? I camp under the freeway at the bottom of Spencer St.

Unfortunately Special, I shall be watching the game, with the lads, in my luxurious home cinema at the manor. A young lady of Biffen's acquaintance shall be on serving duties.

However, I am very pleased to see that you have moved up in the world.

3 minutes ago, old dee said:

Oh thank God you are back Bbo demonland has not been the same without you.

Thank you OD. A cursory reading supports your view.

[beelzebub 22,225]

38 minutes ago, old dee said:

Oh thank God you are back Bbo demonland has not been the same without you.

Careful OD, his ego is healthy enough. A simple tipping of your cap would have sufficed.

[old dee 22,854]

9 minutes ago, beelzebub said:

Careful OD, his ego is healthy enough. A simple tipping of your cap would have sufficed.

Not sure how you tip your cap on here bb but I am open to suggestions.

[ManDee 7,077]

19 minutes ago, beelzebub said:

Careful OD, his ego is healthy enough. A simple tipping of your cap would have sufficed.

Me thinks OD is into doffing not tipping.

Edited February 22, 2017 by ManDee

[beelzebub 22,225]

17 minutes ago, ManDee said:

Me thinks OD is into doffing not tipping.

Must admit , haven't noticed him tip !! 

[daisycutter 28,547]

4 minutes ago, beelzebub said:

Must admit , haven't noticed him tip !! 

surely you've noticed him tipping s@#$ on people?  remember jb? 

[old dee 22,854]

51 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

surely you've noticed him tipping s@#$ on people?  remember jb? 

He has been replaced by BK

[daisycutter 28,547]

Some trivia to ponder. while waiting for the next jack watts post.....I never knew this and it gave me a little chuckle

Hipsters should take note !

GUESS WHO DRESSED THE SS

[ManDee 7,077]

40 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

Some trivia to ponder. while waiting for the next jack watts post.....I never knew this and it gave me a little chuckle

Hipsters should take note !

GUESS WHO DRESSED THE SS

The Germans always had the best suits, and headwear. I have been to Boss's online shop and it would appear that the SS line is discontinued, perhaps to make way for their line of Donald Trump suits.

Edited February 22, 2017 by ManDee
Clarification

[Moonshadow 16,200]

Biff, are you going to insist on being referred to as 'Dear Leader' upon your return? Will you send some women to snuff out Uncle Bitters at the airport as he makes his mercy dash?  

Edited February 22, 2017 by Moonshadow

[Bitter but optimistic 21,254]

5 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Biff, are you going to insist on being referred to as 'Dear Leader' upon your return? Will you send some women to snuff out Uncle Bitters at the airport as he makes his mercy dash?  

Don't expect a reply for a few days Moon - I believe Biffen is having a short term of rehab.

[picket fence 15,167]

10 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Unfortunately Special, I shall be watching the game, with the lads, in my luxurious home cinema at the manor. A young lady of Biffen's acquaintance shall be on serving duties.

However, I am very pleased to see that you have moved up in the world.

Thank you OD. A cursory reading supports your view.

Dear Uncle I am free and happy to BYO If the waitress is happy to serve me all day?? Home Cinema?? What size might I ask??

[Moonshadow 16,200]

35 minutes ago, picket fence said:

Dear Uncle I am free and happy to BYO If the waitress is happy to serve me all day?? Home Cinema?? What size might I ask??

10 inches min to gain entry picket

[dieter 3,325]

57 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Don't expect a reply for a few days Moon - I believe Biffen is having a short term of rehab.

Phew.

[Bitter but optimistic 21,254]

11 hours ago, picket fence said:

Dear Uncle I am free and happy to BYO If the waitress is happy to serve me all day?? Home Cinema?? What size might I ask??

Although I praised Special Robert (above) for his upward social mobility in moving to digs under the freeway, I fear that attending The Manor is an aspiration beyond you at this time picket.

You may, however, drive past and admire my wealth.

As to the size of the screen, it is like everything else at The Manor, outsize.

[picket fence 15,167]

1 hour ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Although I praised Special Robert (above) for his upward social mobility in moving to digs under the freeway, I fear that attending The Manor is an aspiration beyond you at this time picket.

You may, however, drive past and admire my wealth.

As to the size of the screen, it is like everything else at The Manor, outsize.

Outhouse, you mean!!!

[Stretch Johnson 2,568]

On 12/11/2016 at 8:25 AM, Whispering_Jack said:

I take that as a confession on your part and, in accordance with the AFL sanctions policy, ban you from posting for one month backdated to 1 October, 2016.

 

You can smell your background in law.

Been providing sentencing advice to our judiciary?

[Demon trucker 1,770]

Watts watts watts watts watts watts watts watts watts watts going going going going going on on on on on on on on on on on on don't don't don't don't know