Demonstone

ftfy

"The answer my friend, is kicking with the wind ..."

Is that what has made you the perpetually happy, positive and optimistic person you are today?

None of it is my work @Timothy Reddan-A'Blew except the "research" and compiling. It was intended to be a light-hearted bit of fun. Dunno about clutching at straws but, should we lose to GWS, I would anticipate much pearl-clutching.

I'm not, but best of luck in your search.

I hope @Demonsone is watching.

Half-time entertainment? Bring back the long kicking competition and dogs* catching frisbees. *Australian dogs, of course.

Researchers have tracked down the primary school reports of current GWS players. Some examples of their teachers' comments are listed below. It's fortunate for these kids that they grew up to be good at football. Toby Greene - "Toby has set himself an extremely low standard, which he has failed to maintain" Sam Taylor - "The improvement in his handwriting has revealed his inability to spell" Harry Himmelberg - "This child has been working with glue too often" Lachie Whitfield - "Shows a unique ability to turn any maths problem into a story about dinosaurs" Brent Daniels - "Expert at locating lost pencils, except when they're in his hand" Jesse Hogan - "His spirited debates with the classroom clock about time are quite philosophical" Tom Green - "Since my last report, Tom has hit rock bottom and started to dig" Connor Idun - "This student has delusions of adequacy" Callan Ward - "Callan excels at turning oxygen into carbon dioxide" Finn Callaghan - "He should go far and, the sooner he starts, the better" Lachie Ash - "Lachie would be lazy but for continued absence from class" Kieren Briggs - "He has given me a new definition of stoicism. He grins and I bear it" Aaron Cadman - "This student is depriving a village somewhere of an [censored]" Jake Riccardi - "Uses a unique form of sign language, particularly when he thinks nobody is watching" Darcy Jones - "Master of the impromptu show and tell, often featuring items from his pockets" James Peatling - "Shows a deep commitment to ensuring every classroom plant is well conversed with" Toby Bedford - "It would seem that Bedford thinks he is running the classroom and not me. If this attitude persists, one of us will have to leave"

Thank you for your weekly cut and paste that you know is not even true. I noticed that you went missing after we beat Essendon, only to bob up again after we lost to Fremantle. Haven't you got a bridge somewhere you could be lurking under?

Does Tholstrup have a concussed ankle?