Football commentary does my head in

[In Harmes Way 7,492]

1 hour ago, faultydet said:

Brian Taylor is God's gift to this thread.

That may be absolutely true faulty, but his calling of the Hannan goal in the Geelong 2018 final totally offsets all the garbage he's come out with since.

[The heart beats true 16,101]

1 hour ago, Better days ahead said:

Why is Dermie still getting paid work?

My least favourite thing about Derm (and it’s a long list) is that he talks all over the female hosts on Fox. He does it so consistently it’s embarrassing. You can tell they hate working with him.

[DeeZone 7,701]

I really dislike the way Brayshaw continually barracks for our opposition.

[Mel Bourne 3,661]

Things got on a roll early on in the pre-match coverage, when Leigh Montagna asked Simon Goodwin if the recent dip in form was “attitud-unal”. Or maybe it’s spelt “attitud-inal”? Hard to know how non-existent words are spelt. 

[old55 21,256]

The VFL commentary was good in Casey vs Essendon - they just called the game and interpreted what was happening.

I didn't mind Mark Soderstrom as boundary rider - his interviews were quite good and he doesn't seem biased.

[TRIGON 4,715]

1 hour ago, Smokey said:

I’ve been waiting for this thread my whole life, and I don’t even know where to start 

"Chisel" it.

[old55 21,256]

7 minutes ago, DeeZone said:

I really dislike the way Brayshaw continually barracks for our opposition.

Brayshaw has only one tempo and loudness - always straining and horrible to listen to.

[Fanatique Demon 2,383]

The cliches, tautologies and superlatives do my head in.

All of them… “took it at its highest point” (that must be at about 30 m high); “lower the eyes”.

Brayshaw… “he’s done brilliantly well”

Macguire… “fantastic”, “superb”, “brilliant”, “superstar”. Plus his shoe-horning into the commentary of anything remotely related to Collingwood.

[Smokey 4,124]

Just now, TRIGON said:

"Chisel" it.

Oh thats a good one - BT's different words for describing a kick 

"A slider", "a dribbler", "a chiseler". There are many more, cant think of them all right now.

wow wee 

[Melb-A-Toast 257]

9 minutes ago, Mel Bourne said:

Things got on a roll early on in the pre-match coverage, when Leigh Montagna asked Simon Goodwin if the recent dip in form was “attitud-unal”. Or maybe it’s spelt “attitud-inal”? Hard to know how non-existent words are spelt. 

I am comfortable that attitudinal is a word. 

[whatwhat say what 18,888]

one of the most egregious bits of commentary last nite was when i think the lesser mclachan said after plugger had kicked another goal that 'his action isn't the smoothest'

what a nong

he literally has the PERFECT set shot approach

[Diamond_Jim 11,732]

It's the style of commentary.

Not that many years ago Australian racing commentators were praised for their rapid fire commentary and ability to cover a field multiple times in a race by comparison to the slower style used in other countries. Similarly radio football commentators practised their crescendo style of call and tried to outdo each other on the comparative excitement stakes when describing a mark. Don't get me started on Rex Hunt.

The trouble was these styles while great for radio were then taken to television but they forgot we can actually see what is happening and therefore don't need the bledding obvious explained to us. English soccer commentary is more to my style but the game admittedly at most times moves at a different pace.

Frankly I'm not sure where the balance is but I know that the "excitement meter" needs to be dialled back a little. Of course in this day and age there is ampletechnological scope for an alternative commentary.

As an aside when watching tennis I have the commentary off as they add so little. Would like to hear the "thwack" of the ball though.

[Guest]

One more whinge I'd like to add....

The cronyism in these circles is bloody appalling. 

Hamish is the type of bloke they should keep away from the commentator's booth: preppy, blow waved and cliched. Somehow, he gets a gig. Not sure what the reason is, but I'm fed up to it up to my GILLS!

Basil Zempilas is another example. A decent state grade football career parlayed into a role with Channel 7. Now, he is the [censored]ing lord mayor of Perth based on his connections with Kerry Stokes. 

I could go on and on, but the fact these mediocrities exist in these spaces to grease each others palms says to me that competence isn't the first metric they employ when choosing commentators.

Edited July 9, 2021 by Colin B. Flaubert

[Mel Bourne 3,661]

1 hour ago, Melb-A-Toast said:

I am comfortable that attitudinal is a word. 

Oh lord, I really should have googled that! I stand utterly corrected, and corrected on grammar by Leigh Montagna, just to make it worse. My day is ruined. 

[Click_Bate 155]

Anyone remember how bad the commentary was for our round 3 clash with GWS? That game stands out so clearly for me. 
I’ll never forget when Kelli Underwood said “and that’s why they call him slick fritch.”

Stuck in my head so long that I’ve realised she’s actually a genius ? 
 

[The Reverend 1,704]

I thought Brayshaw was most informative last night. Half way through the game he told us Melbourne were wearing the old school jumpers and how it reminded him of Robbie Flower. I would never have known what colour jumpers we were wearing if it hadn't been for his incisive commentary.

[Jjrogan 1,193]

Play a drinking game where you take a shot every time a player or an action is described as 'unbelievable' . 

a) surely, given it happens every week, there is a chance one could believe it happened again. 

B) youll be proper drunk by half time. 

having said that, Petracca was unbelievable last night. 

 

 

 

[La Dee-vina Comedia 16,394]

1 hour ago, Go the Biff said:

Agreed. The AFLW and VFL commentary teams just get on with calling the game and they do it well.

In terms of "special comments" Leppa has been a welcome addition. The two best at this though are Daisy Pearce & Abbie Holmes. Their insight is a class above the other boofheads that 7 trot out .

Jobe Watson does my head in. Butchers the language. He dead set invents his own words.

Worked alright for a bloke called William Shakespeare.

[Lord Travis 10,158]

I’ll copy paste my post from game day thread last night.

Jobe Watson: “taken the ball at its highest point”. No he hasn’t Jobe you [censored] [censored]. It’s highest point was 30 meters in air. I’m sick of moron commentators saying this!

[WalkingCivilWar 31,346]

We all remember Bruce McAvaney, don’t we?

Annoying af, wasn’t he?

Ended every sentence with a question, didn’t he?

Made you wanna throw something at your TV, didn’t it?

[faultydet 7,593]

27 minutes ago, Click_Bate said:

Anyone remember how bad the commentary was for our round 3 clash with GWS? That game stands out so clearly for me. 
I’ll never forget when Kelli Underwood said “and that’s why they call him slick fritch.”

Stuck in my head so long that I’ve realised she’s actually a genius ? 
 

Kellie Underwood escapes criticism because she is female.

 

She is an atrocious commentator just above BTs' level.

[faultydet 7,593]

2 hours ago, In Harmes Way said:

That may be absolutely true faulty, but his calling of the Hannan goal in the Geelong 2018 final totally offsets all the garbage he's come out with since.

Can you link the call please. I thought I'd watched a very replay of Hannans goal and I've never seen one from Taylor.

The call by Gerard Whately of that goal was one of the best AFL calls ive ever heard.

[Ethan Tremblay 28,358]

I can zone out and ignore the commentary however whoever was sniffing into the mic was giving me the [censored]. I’ll blame Jobe because of the size of his beak and the nasally way he speaks. Plus because it’s Jobe. 

Edited July 9, 2021 by Ethan Trembley

[Go the Biff 3,127]

23 minutes ago, La Dee-vina Comedia said:

Worked alright for a bloke called William Shakespeare.

Shocking commentator. Even worse singer

[deegirl 1,289]

2 hours ago, The heart beats true said:

My least favourite thing about Derm (and it’s a long list) is that he talks all over the female hosts on Fox. He does it so consistently it’s embarrassing. You can tell they hate working with him.

Never forget Derm's all time classic of suggesting David Wirrapunda wouldn't like playing in cold weather (apparently in Dermie's world all indigenous players come from the desert).  Someone had to tell him Wirrapunda is from Healesville ?