Brilliant one-liners

[Sir Why You Little 34,924]

Bad day to give up smoking...." Flying High.

[Deevout 449]

Neville Chamberlain PM of the UK was descibed as a sheep in sheep's clothing

[Jack Jack 415]

"But obviously, we've got to stand with our North Korean allies."

Sarah Palin

"And so the fact that they purchased the machine meant somebody had to make the machine. And when somebody makes a machine, it means there's jobs at the machine-making place."

"So long as I'm the president, my measure of success is victory -- and success."

"Thank you, your Holiness. Awesome speech."

"Let's make sure that there is certainty during uncertain times in our economy."

George W. Bush (How on earth did he get voted in...... twice!)

[Macca 16,173]

I won't be ignored , Dan . ( Fatal Attraction )

Edited January 6, 2012 by Macca

[daisycutter 28,684]

Reg Fairchild ... where do I know that name?

brother of Max (Beau [repaire] and Mad Max I infamy) aka Skull

Edited January 6, 2012 by daisycutter

[Macca 16,173]

Some from the wonderful Robin Williams

"If it's the psychic network why do they need a phone number ?"

"Do you think God gets stoned ? I think so ..........look at the platypus "

"I'm sorry , if you were right , I'd agree with you"

"My God , we've had cloning in the South for years . It's called Cousins "

[Steamin Demon 370]

Hello, 911? It’s Quagmire. Yeah, it’s caught in the window this time. - Glen Quagmire

[Bossdog 2,002]

Birdie num num ---------Peter Sellers The Party

[Range Rover 1,935]

brother of Max (Beau [repaire] and Mad Max I infamy) aka Skull

Yep, thought so! Knew Reg quite well as a former MHSOB player. One of the great stalwarts of the club.

He was indeed very well known for his one-liners and I can still remember his voice as the boys would leave the after match social function to go chase girls at nightclubs along Fitzroy St.

Among his best quips .... "GO UGLY EARLY!!!"

Edited January 7, 2012 by Range Rover

[daisycutter 28,684]

Yep, thought so! Knew Reg quite well as a former MHSOB player. One of the great stalwarts of the club.

He was indeed very well known for his one-liners and I can still remember his voice as the boys would leave the after match social function to go chase girls at nightclubs along Fitzroy St.

Among his best quips .... "GO UGLY EARLY!!!"

Yep, that was Reg. He had a million one-liners

[Wadda We Sing 10,685]

Dats whats Im talkin aboooooout!.......stlll a good one, even though I hate the team.

[Macca 16,173]

"I was such an ugly kid , when I played in the sandpit , the cat kept covering me up"

"My wife was afraid of the dark , then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light"

"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot , but I always found them"

"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot"

Rodney Dangerfield

[hardtack 10,149]

"it were always rainin' on Denleigh Moor, 'cept when it were fine...but even then it were drizzlin', and if you call drizzle rain, well, it we're always rainin' on Denleigh Moor." - Eric Olthwaite

Edited January 8, 2012 by hardtack

[gsmith12 491]

"Happy as a bastard on father's day"

[Olgreybeard49 239]

"The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey."

"You've come over at a very appropriate time; Ray Illingworth has just relieved himself at the pavilion end."

Classics from legendary BBC commentator, Brian Johnston.

in

[Olgreybeard49 239]

In runs Cunis. His bowling, like his name, neither one thing nor the other.

[Biffen 12,431]

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

- Steven Wright

My first girlfriend was like the girl next door if you lived next to a hooker.-Also the great Steven Wright

[Sir Why You Little 34,924]

"it were always rainin' on Denleigh Moor, 'cept when it were fine...but even then it were drizzlin', and if you call drizzle rain, well, it we're always rainin' on Denleigh Moor." - Eric Olthwaite

Hahaha! Superb the most boring man in the world!

[Sir Why You Little 34,924]

"i don't believe it, it's that sh!tbox Dodge again" The Blues Brothers.

[Bitter but optimistic 21,556]

In runs Cunis. His bowling, like his name, neither one thing nor the other.

I just nearly busted a gut. Do you know who said this?

[Olgreybeard49 239]

Cunis comment was from John Arlott, legendary BBC cricket commentator. Yes, I am old enough to have heard him actually say it.

[Range Rover 1,935]

"Nihilists! F***k me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos."

- Walter Sobchak

[Sir Why You Little 34,924]

- Walter Sobchak

" and i certainly do not roll on saturday..."

[Deestroy All 14,262]

Is unobtainium easy to obtain? Peter Griffin

[Dinosaur Rover 197]

"I was such an ugly kid , when I played in the sandpit , the cat kept covering me up"

"My wife was afraid of the dark , then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light"

"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot , but I always found them"

"I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot"

Rodney Dangerfield

Also...

I was an ugly child, very ugly - my mother breast fed me through a straw.

She was a very ugly girl - I took her to a plastic surgeon - he added a tail. I gave her a hickey I got fur in my mouth, she wears a watch on both wrists - she covers two time zones.

When Im with girls I dont think straight this girl calls me and says Ive got mirrors all over my ceiling, come over and bring a bottle - I brought windex!