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Demons on Masterchef (16/5/18)

hardtack
in Melbourne Demons

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Posted

Just saw an ad on TV for Masterchef where the contestants will be cooking at the MCG and it will feature Jones as a guest judge... also the men’s and women’s teams will be involved as the guinea pigs.

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    When I think haute cuisine, Chunk is the very next thing that comes to mind

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    Also team selection will be on Survivor on Thursday night. 

     

    Spoiler alert:

    Dom Tyson, time for you to go. 

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    The episode is airing in conjunction with the game this Sunday and 8th anniversary of this golden turd nugget.

    116702A1-8B91-4B1C-9273-781DAB7CFC3C.jpeg

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    24 minutes ago, Deestroy All said:

    Also team selection will be on Survivor on Thursday night. 

     

    Spoiler alert:

    Dom Tyson, time for you to go. 

    It would be just like Dom to play his hidden immunity idol and get a seat on the bench.

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    33 minutes ago, small but forward said:

    When I think haute cuisine, Chunk is the very next thing that comes to mind

    .....

     

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    Let me tell you a story about Masterchef. 

    My ex missus, a fairly well known chef, featured on the program in one of the early seasons. On one episode, contestants had to replicate her recipes for judging by the usual panel. On another, she was invited to be on the judging panel itself (a final IIRC). 

    In the one where they cooked her food, she reckoned all but one actually executed the dish properly. That person got scored the lowest and was kicked off the show because they were obese or ethnic or whatever compromised ratings. 

    In the one where she was a judge, she reckoned one particular dish was just awful. Inedible. Especially after the food sits there for 2 hours whilst they prepare for the next segment. Anyway, she says to Georgie and his pals she’s gonna generously give the plate of [censored] a ‘2’. Whilst the rest of the gang agreed the dish   was rubbish, the producers forced her to score a ‘6’! 

    Now for those who have worked in hospitality, it’s needless to say that when a group of chefs (there were some others on the judging panel that episode) are bored and have time to kill, they may find ways to...indulge! 

    So a few sheets to the wind and naturally rebellious, my ex missus brushed off the tap on the shoulder from the producers and scored a ‘2’ anyway. They had to re do the whole scene again!

    The powers that be manipulating the judiciary to the benefit of select individuals or parties - sounds like the AFL/mro/tribunal, ay? 

    Masterchef is a bloody nonsense and has created a phenomenon of starry eyed, entitled bed-wetters of thinking they have some rite of passage to become a celebrity chef. Shut the [censored] up, put down your tweezers and get in the corner and peel 60kg of carrots, kid, there’s a queue of 50 people from all nationalities and desperate personal situations to take your job, you little [censored]. 

     

    I hope Chunk won’t be forced to lie. No one deserves that. 

     

    And for the record, I played against George Colombarus in an inter-restaurant charity soccer game. I’m 6”2 and was playing as a defender on Georgie. He thought he was quick, but my long legs were wrapped around him all day like an alien on Sigourney Weaver’s god dam face. 

    After yet another intercept (with plenty of niggle) he cracked the [censored] and had a sook to the umpire. Then he gave me a mouthful and moved position! In a bloody charity game! Grade A jerk. 

    We won 2-1. 

     

     

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    6 minutes ago, Deemented Are Go! said:

    He thought he was quick, but my long legs were wrapped around him all day like an alien on Sigourney Weaver’s god dam face.

    I had to read this twice to make sure I hadn't gotten the wrong idea

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    1 minute ago, Mazer Rackham said:

    I had to read this twice to make sure I hadn't gotten the wrong idea

    Some of my tackles probably ended up looking like what you imagine. I’d had half a dozen stubbies before the game! 

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    9 minutes ago, Emerald said:

    Reality TV is the Devil's scourge.

    Not to be confused with the Devil's dumplings! ....

    .....

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    16 minutes ago, Deemented Are Go! said:

    Some of my tackles probably ended up looking like what you imagine. I’d had half a dozen stubbies before the game! 

    What I imagine?

    Let's see ... your long legs wrapped around George Colombaris ... tentacles ... Sigourney Weaver's face ... your tackle ... I'm not sure I want to imagine!

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    Reality TV and the Demons. My 2 great loves united in 1 ridiculous thread.

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    Nice appetiser for the Demonland podcast later that same night ...

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    1 hour ago, Deemented Are Go! said:

    Let me tell you a story about Masterchef. 

    My ex missus, a fairly well known chef, featured on the program in one of the early seasons. On one episode, contestants had to replicate her recipes for judging by the usual panel. On another, she was invited to be on the judging panel itself (a final IIRC). 

    In the one where they cooked her food, she reckoned all but one actually executed the dish properly. That person got scored the lowest and was kicked off the show because they were obese or ethnic or whatever compromised ratings. 

    In the one where she was a judge, she reckoned one particular dish was just awful. Inedible. Especially after the food sits there for 2 hours whilst they prepare for the next segment. Anyway, she says to Georgie and his pals she’s gonna generously give the plate of [censored] a ‘2’. Whilst the rest of the gang agreed the dish   was rubbish, the producers forced her to score a ‘6’! 

    Now for those who have worked in hospitality, it’s needless to say that when a group of chefs (there were some others on the judging panel that episode) are bored and have time to kill, they may find ways to...indulge! 

    So a few sheets to the wind and naturally rebellious, my ex missus brushed off the tap on the shoulder from the producers and scored a ‘2’ anyway. They had to re do the whole scene again!

    The powers that be manipulating the judiciary to the benefit of select individuals or parties - sounds like the AFL/mro/tribunal, ay? 

    Masterchef is a bloody nonsense and has created a phenomenon of starry eyed, entitled bed-wetters of thinking they have some rite of passage to become a celebrity chef. Shut the [censored] up, put down your tweezers and get in the corner and peel 60kg of carrots, kid, there’s a queue of 50 people from all nationalities and desperate personal situations to take your job, you little [censored]. 

     

    I hope Chunk won’t be forced to lie. No one deserves that. 

     

    And for the record, I played against George Colombarus in an inter-restaurant charity soccer game. I’m 6”2 and was playing as a defender on Georgie. He thought he was quick, but my long legs were wrapped around him all day like an alien on Sigourney Weaver’s god dam face. 

    After yet another intercept (with plenty of niggle) he cracked the [censored] and had a sook to the umpire. Then he gave me a mouthful and moved position! In a bloody charity game! Grade A jerk. 

    We won 2-1. 

     

     

    As an ex chef with some mates and old colleagues who have appeared on the show, I 100% second all of this.

     

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    I was going to apply for Masterchef one year but then I realised I didn’t have a sad backstory so I didn’t see the point. 

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    1 hour ago, Ethan Tremblay said:

    I was going to apply for Masterchef one year but then I realised I didn’t have a sad backstory so I didn’t see the point. 

    Melbourne supporter...

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    4 hours ago, Ethan Tremblay said:

    I was going to apply for Masterchef one year but then I realised I didn’t have a sad backstory so I didn’t see the point. 

    Image result for ethan tremblay sad backstory
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    9 hours ago, hardtack said:

    Just saw an ad on TV for Masterchef where the contestants will be cooking at the MCG and it will feature Jones as a guest judge... also the men’s and women’s teams will be involved as the guinea pigs.

    Why cant this club stay away fro m this type of  Bu$%*hit  promotion  Adds nothing to the club and diverts attention

    Concentrate on Playing and training for the next Game

    Carlton will not be easy and we need to put 100 % effort in to beat them

    Edited by jackaub

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