Mazer Rackham

His name is a spoonerism. Real name Duke Lunstan.

No, you won't need Excel for this quiz. (UNLIKE SOME RECENT ONES I COULD NAME.) It's a lot simpler than that.

I give David credit for attempting to answer without going straight to the back of the book to look it up.

In '22 we got too careful with our ball movement. Having no Tommy and a barely mobile Brown led to us being static and unimaginative up forward. Defenders were comfortable instead of panicked. If I can see these things then our coaching panel certainly can. GO DEMONS!

Italian, Spanish and French, mostly

"The new ground will surfaced with cannabis plants. The boundary ropes, gazebos, and gear bags made of hemp. Free hashish provided to all affiliated teams, minorites and the underprivileged. Also a new electric scooter to every MP who votes for this." You've just gotta think outside the square. (MLC, I know)

Yeah, they'd probably say "don't let the door hit you on the way out", rename us the Burnie Demons, and make a brand new club called the Melbourne Knicks or Jets or Yankees and set them up in a giant indoor facility built over the newly-razed AAMI and Gosch's precincts.

Kossie can't even crack their seconds?

FINALLY our upgraded facilities came through! Thank you MFC and thank you Vic govt!

"Good morning, Minister." "Morning. You new here? A nice cuppa, thanks love. One lump. And a biscuit too." "Er, minister, we are the delegation from Melbourne." "From ..... ?" "Melbourne." " ......... Melbourne?" "Melbourne Football Club." "Right. Right. Melbourne Football Club. Erm ... siddown. What can I do for you?" "Thank you for meeting us, Minister. We'd like to discuss and advance our mutual plans for the Gosch's Paddock redevelopment." "The Gosch's ...... oh, right! NOW I know who you are! Nup." ".... 'nup'?" "Yeah. Nup. CAROL! See in my next appointment." "I ... we ... thank you Minis-- THANK YOU MIN--" *Later* "What a disaster. How are we going to spin that?" "Let say something like, 'The Club continued discussions regarding', etc etc."

It's to confuse his enemies. "I told you to tag Langdon!" "Duh ... gee coach." "You know who is he is, don't you?" "Nah ... yeah .... nah. I dunno." "The one with the long hair!" "Duh ... okay coach." *thinks* "I fought he went to Freo? Better book me plane ticket now."

Rolling Stones in some shape or form seem to pop up as putative answers in every D'land quiz.

Oh, come on. Think "Rolling Stones guitar players".

What do these players have in common? Be effusive. B: L.Birch T.Gillard HB: S.Heath M.Gay S.Goldrick C: S.Lampard T.Hanks B.Mackin HF: A.Bannan K.Paxman K.Hore F: D.Pearce T.Harris Foll: L.Pearce O.Purcell E.West I/C: M.Chaplin C.Sherriff L.Mithen E.Zanker M.Fitzsimon

OMG!!!!! How remiss of me. The winners. Gold @La Dee-vina Comedia Silver @Demonstone [email protected] Pitted aluminium @Timothy Reddan-A'Blew