More and more Fev trouble

[Guest Rojik of the Arctic]

So many tall poppy syndromers who are loving watching Fev flounder, but to me this is just a sad picture of a broken man. Gambling when he surely knows that's the worst possible idea, but what else has he got to do? The fact that he was there by himself tells the biggest story - where are his mates and his family? Does he have any left? I wonder where he went after he left Crown. With no friends or family in support and no job to keep him occupied, it's no wonder he ended up back there.

This is a guy with a serious problem and zero support. Having a hefty income stream only makes it worse - the sooner he runs out of money (or ideally, someone in the right frame of mine takes responsibility for his money) the better, because I expect this pattern will just continue until it can't any more.

That's a good post. It's getting a bit like kicking a cripple now with the way the media is with him and the way the public are enjoying his continuing fall from grace. Sure he is a goose and I don't want him anywhere near my club but it isn't pretty watching a man destroy himself so publicly.

[Steamin Demon 392]

So many tall poppy syndromers who are loving watching Fev flounder, but to me this is just a sad picture of a broken man. Gambling when he surely knows that's the worst possible idea, but what else has he got to do? The fact that he was there by himself tells the biggest story - where are his mates and his family? Does he have any left? I wonder where he went after he left Crown. With no friends or family in support and no job to keep him occupied, it's no wonder he ended up back there.

This is a guy with a serious problem and zero support. Having a hefty income stream only makes it worse - the sooner he runs out of money (or ideally, someone in the right frame of mine takes responsibility for his money) the better, because I expect this pattern will just continue until it can't any more.

His ex is probably gearing up for another launch party somewhere.

[Adzman 2,154]

I actually want to see Fev turn his career around. I was never someone with a god given talent for anything, but someone like Fev was gifted with the ability to play footy.

Footy is all he knows, and I hope Fev can dig in deep and put this shocking string of events behind him.

He needs help, not people shaking their fingers telling everyone "i told you so".

[dee-luded 2,959]

I actually want to see Fev turn his career around. I was never someone with a god given talent for anything, but someone like Fev was gifted with the ability to play footy.

Footy is all he knows, and I hope Fev can dig in deep and put this shocking string of events behind him.

He needs help, not people shaking their fingers telling everyone "i told you so".

I think he can,,, If he has constant support of highly qualified professionals, + the support of his family and siblings, + the understanding & Support from his Ex!

Footy to Fev is not a difficult thing to do, it's natural for him.

It seems his difficulty is more aroud socialising,,, & Especially Alcohol. to me he seems also like a attention Junkie. This is not an insult, but rather an observation of a type of personality complex. It may be that with an attention deficit disorder, that he has become needy of the excitement rush'...

With the right help, I reckon he can sort through this stuff and learn how to Manage these problems.

People bagging him isn't helping at all. This bloke is Not a big head... He just comes across that way. But it's not the case.

[Rhino Richards 1,467]

Being one of those blue sky merchants I don't really know what to think. Except for pity and pity doesn't help anyone. I'm not surprised by fall backs he encounters along the way, as you point out he is far from clean of his issues.

But I am surprised how quickly he fell. Being in such a public place it can only be a cry for help.

Fair enough DH. Its a sad case and I dont think the media have done anything but report his presence and exit at a place he should not have been at.

[Rhino Richards 1,467]

Footy to Fev is not a difficult thing to do, it's natural for him.

There are a few other activities he finds even easier. I dont think footy life has been good for Fev at all. Its merely provided a financial and unreal platform over 13 years for his public disintegration.

[Arrow 1,257]

I'm 100% going to go into bat for fev and i'm happy to have an intellectual conversation/ battle with anyone. but that said given its demonland apparently the new thing is to make low blows until the topic loses all credibility.

Fev has made some shocking mistakes in his life and I know an interview is only as good as the script put in front of them but if his didnt scream of lost opportunities and a life time of letting himself and his family down I don't know what did.

Brendan and this is the saddest part, would have to be as close as being mentally classified retarded as you could get. He was born stupid and it will always be the case. The trouble is his friends 'Sam Newman' and the rest of the Footy Show have used him as they needed him and they toss him on his ass when he gets into trouble. My respect rose for Craig Hutchinson tonight and generally i find him to be an arrogant [censored], however he for once in his life showed empathy.

I truly hope Fev plays footy again, plays well, and proves everyone wrong.

*edit* changed bad language

Edited March 10, 2011 by Demon Land 7

[Sir Why You Little 37,039]

I'm 100% going to go into bat for fev and i'm happy to have an intellectual conversation/ battle with anyone. but that said given its demonland apparently the new thing is to make low blows until the topic loses all credibility.

Fev has made some shocking mistakes in his life and I know an interview is only as good as the script put in front of them but if his didnt scream of lost opportunities and a life time of letting himself and his family down I don't know what did.

Brendan and this is the saddest part, would have to be as close as being mentally classified retarded as you could get. He was born stupid and it will always be the case. The trouble is his friends 'Sam Newman' and the rest of the Footy Show have used him as they needed him and they toss him on his ass when he gets into trouble. My respect rose for Craig Hutchinson tonight and generally i find him to be an arrogant [censored], however he for once in his life showed empathy.

I truly hope Fev plays footy again, plays well and then shoves his fist right up Sam Newman's a55

I totally agree with you...The Footy show threw him out on Brownlow night.

The only thing i will possibly disagree with you on is that i don't think Brendon should play Football again. i do not think it's what he really needs, that said he probably will play again, and have the first of many relapses.

I think he genuinely wants to be a good person, but just has absolutely no idea how to do it.

Playing football in the spotlight getting paid wads of cash is NOT the answer. But he is still way off learning that.

[dee-luded 2,959]

I totally agree with you...The Footy show threw him out on Brownlow night.

The only thing i will possibly disagree with you on is that i don't think Brendon should play Football again. i do not think it's what he really needs, that said he probably will play again, and have the first of many relapses.

I think he genuinely wants to be a good person, but just has absolutely no idea how to do it.

Playing football in the spotlight getting paid wads of cash is NOT the answer. But he is still way off learning that.

He is a good person. But he has some issues with non violent self abuse.

If he didn't have these anti social issues, he'd probably be like David Neitz.

[Arrow 1,257]

I totally agree with you...The Footy show threw him out on Brownlow night.

The only thing i will possibly disagree with you on is that i don't think Brendon should play Football again. i do not think it's what he really needs, that said he probably will play again, and have the first of many relapses.

I think he genuinely wants to be a good person, but just has absolutely no idea how to do it.

Playing football in the spotlight getting paid wads of cash is NOT the answer. But he is still way off learning that.

Yeah it's a very interesting one. You can almost guarantee you'll get so many people strongly for or against I just feel looking in he's trying hard.

You can't sit 66 days in rehab and fake it. You can't say and do what he's mentioned without some backing. Like i said, it's unlikely but I hope he gets back somehow.

FWIW, and this is probably pushing it, never been addicted to anything but I personally don't think the casino problem is 7/8ths of the problem. The idea of it is bad but in principle it seems petty. The man's real problem was horse gambling and the fact he hasn't done that in 13 months whilst maintaining he spends 20$ a week on online poker games would have to prove they don't (in his brain) have a correlation and therefore urge him to gamble on horses.

I don't know maybe I'm just trying to look for the good in the lad but thats my opinion

[Rhino Richards 1,467]

You can't sit 66 days in rehab and fake it.

You can actually sit there longer and achieve the same outcome.

Its more important what he does after he leaves rehab rather than wht he does inside it.Rehab will not dry him out (and nor will a pill) nor does it stop him gambling. His post rehab efforts are not good so far.

Gambling and alcohol etc are symptoms of the cause(s) that Fevola has to deal with in his life. Its up to him what choices he makes in dealing with the causes. I am not sure he will ever make the correct choices.

And as Dr WYL has rightly said, I dont think footy has been or will assist him in that journey.

[Sir Why You Little 37,039]

Yeah it's a very interesting one. You can almost guarantee you'll get so many people strongly for or against I just feel looking in he's trying hard.

You can't sit 66 days in rehab and fake it. You can't say and do what he's mentioned without some backing. Like i said, it's unlikely but I hope he gets back somehow.

FWIW, and this is probably pushing it, never been addicted to anything but I personally don't think the casino problem is 7/8ths of the problem. The idea of it is bad but in principle it seems petty. The man's real problem was horse gambling and the fact he hasn't done that in 13 months whilst maintaining he spends 20$ a week on online poker games would have to prove they don't (in his brain) have a correlation and therefore urge him to gamble on horses.

I don't know maybe I'm just trying to look for the good in the lad but thats my opinion

Gambling is his problem, whether it is Horses or Casino-doesn't matter...that's why i don't believe he will even start to get to get better until he leaves that building alone.

A gambling win is an adrenelin high, maybe like kicking goals at AFL level. That's what Brendon Craves, and when he doesn't get it, he gets bored and self destructive.

What he said about rehab is spot on, and good on him-But he still needs 24/7 care at present because the big city is full of "tastes" that he must avoid (completely)

Those "Clockwork Orange" drugs he has been taking are full on, so i hope that has at least stopped the drinking for now, He won't get better-but i hope he learns to master the strength to manage it all daily.

Edited March 10, 2011 by why you little

[Sir Why You Little 37,039]

You can actually sit there longer and achieve the same outcome.

Its more important what he does after he leaves rehab rather than wht he does inside it.Rehab will not dry him out (and nor will a pill) nor does it stop him gambling. His post rehab efforts are not good so far.

Gambling and alcohol etc are symptoms of the cause(s) that Fevola has to deal with in his life. Its up to him what choices he makes in dealing with the causes. I am not sure he will ever make the correct choices.

And as Dr WYL has rightly said, I dont think footy has been or will assist him in that journey.

Those pills he has been taking will dry him out i assure you, it depends on whether he can change his environment on the outside as to whether he will relapse or not.

Catching up with old mates at Crown is not recommended sadly, but most addicts do relapse at least a couple of times before waking up. That's where the media are going to make it even harder.

I am not exactly sure of his medication, but it will be either this one, or part of that family...

Interesting reading ..... Detox Drugs

Edited March 10, 2011 by why you little

[Schneider 220]

what an idiot, he could of just gone on pokerstar's or 888 and not been caught by the media. now can i lend a few bucks, i swear im better then this guy, he just got lucky with a 7 and hit his 7, i had a q.

Clearly haven't had a problem yourself. Gambling with other addicts around feels like company, hard to believe I know. No one wants to be sitting at home doing it (well some do, probably not Fev)

Having said that, little sympathy for the guy. Wake up and sort yourself out, plenty of others do without the opportunities you have.

[H_T 3,047]

I'm no expert on depression, gambling, alcoholism or ADD, but Fev obviously needs support and help, ongoing - he may get some of that through football, but it's what he also does in his spare time that matters. His life to me is more important and should be the main priority - rather than footy, it's in the balance having been turned upside down through much fault of his own. This trip he is going on to LA, he may think he needs it but it could be the worst thing for him.

I hope he finds his feet for his sake, his wife's sake, his kids sake...

It's his choice.

[Fork 'em 6,983]

He's obviously far from in control of his problems .

I've changed my stance and now hope Casey continues to give him a go .

Taking football from him at this stage just may be the straw that breaks the camels back .

JMO .

[Demon 16 213]

Casey have egg on their faces already. Idiots.

[Rhino Richards 1,467]

Those pills he has been taking will dry him out i assure you...

I prefer the insights of those qualified and informed to make such statements. The pill does not stop his alcoholism.

http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-news/fevola-warned-pill-no-cure-20110309-1bo0f.html

"Disulfiram will help Fevola deal in the short-term with his alcohol issues but it may not be the long-term solution. ''It's really a matter of you weaning yourself off the reliance of alcohol. You are not actually curing the underlying position,'' Larkins said."

[Chook 15,013]

Fev needs to be able to associate football with a life devoid of the things that are bad for him. By people around him removing stimuli such as alcohol and gambling, he will learn to be able to put playing football into a context that doesn't involve the things that are harming him. This is why it is so important that people he respects are able to display the kinds of behaviour that Fev should be displaying. Playing footy at a second-tier club could be a great move, as long as the guys he's playing with can earn his respect for things that don't involve the stuff that's hurting him. Positive role models are so important in situations like this, even for a guy his age.

The second important aspect that fading from the public's eye a little - but not entirely - will bring, is the vague fear or recognition that if he REALLY stuffs up, he'll be called on it and his reputation will be further damaged. This understanding will likely help stop him from continually reverting back to the behaviour that is so damaging for him, without being such a specter looming over him that he can't function properly. The media can be a very strict task-master at times - so strict in fact, that it makes it impossible for anyone caught under the microscope to act naturally. Living in constant fear of judgment is not a very good way to change behaviour at all. A little of that can be good, because it provides a framework of consequences for one's actions, but too much can become overwhelming.

[jayceebee31 761]

Fair enough DH. Its a sad case and I dont think the media have done anything but report his presence and exit at a place he should not have been at.

Who are you kidding re the media-the media pounds him instead of leaving him alone and letting him try to get his life back in some order. Now the football community should get behind him, take him away and sincerely try to help him. He needs lots of love and care at the moment and football is the no.1 factor to assist in his recovery outside his beloved family and friends.

[rpfc 28,433]

Who are you kidding re the media-the media pounds him instead of leaving him alone and letting him try to get his life back in some order. Now the football community should get behind him, take him away and sincerely try to help him. He needs lots of love and care at the moment and football is the no.1 factor to assist in his recovery outside his beloved family and friends.

Why is football the no.1 factor - which you immediately demote to the no.3 factor - but why is football the 'number three factor'?

[dee-luded 2,959]

Gambling is his problem, whether it is Horses or Casino-doesn't matter...that's why i don't believe he will even start to get to get better until he leaves that building alone.

A gambling win is an adrenelin high, maybe like kicking goals at AFL level. That's what Brendon Craves, and when he doesn't get it, he gets bored and self destructive.

What he said about rehab is spot on, and good on him-But he still needs 24/7 care at present because the big city is full of "tastes" that he must avoid (completely)

Those "Clockwork Orange" drugs he has been taking are full on, so i hope that has at least stopped the drinking for now, He won't get better-but i hope he learns to master the strength to manage it all daily.

I think it's too difficult to totally let go, the things you do in life,,, if there is nothing else. So, IMO, he has to do what he's doing without those big punts, whilst actively trying to create other interests/hobbies, pasttimes. when he has some fulfilling things to occupy his mind & time, then he should try to let go of all forms of gambling. But too cold turkey, without anything else in his life, could be a bad recipe.

He needs to get into a couple of "groups", weekly. And find what 'community issues', stir his emotions, & try to get involved.

This boy Is worth it.

Edited March 11, 2011 by dee-luded

[Rhino Richards 1,467]

Who are you kidding re the media-the media pounds him instead of leaving him alone and letting him try to get his life back in some order. Now the football community should get behind him, take him away and sincerely try to help him. He needs lots of love and care at the moment and football is the no.1 factor to assist in his recovery outside his beloved family and friends.

If he kept a low profile and did not stray with the alcohol and gambling then the media would reflect the general public sympathy and not hound a person who has just come out of rehab and trying to get his life together. Unfortunately Fev has undetaken a number of disturbing actions which has only brought the wrath on himself.

I think the football community has done more than enough for Fevola. Its time for Fev and his management and close aides to take responsibility for his issues and deal with them.

And why the hell is football a no 1 factor? Unbelievable. You must still be pining for him at MFC.

[Good Times Grimes 2,396]

Has there been any word from Casey regarding their views on his latest dramas?

[old55 23,577]

Football doesn't owe Fev anything, it's definitely the other way round. He's burned so many people who have spent so much time and effort on him he's run out of chances.

Fev needs to take responsibility for himself and if he can prove himself worthy football may decide to give him another go.

Agreed - I couldn't give a [censored] about Fev - just another loser with more to lose than most. I do care if he damages MFC.