1 hour ago, Engorged Onion said:

Ha! Me to, that would be a bit weird given the esteem that he is held in, I probably didn't explain myself - I wouldn't do it during the interview process.

I am an unhinged supporter and personalise EVERYTHING and forget nothing...

Adam Unhinged The God. Has a nice ring to it.

1 hour ago, Queanbeyan Demon said:

No one will be satisfactory enough to coach us - that much is clear.

1 hour ago, biggestred said:

craig bellamy would be satisfactory

This is how this plays out on the game day thread @biggestred.

Round 1, 2026: Melbourne v Collingwood — Official Game Day Thread

First Bounce

• Poster 1: “Why are we lining up like an NRL defensive set?”

• Poster 2: “Bellamy’s already got Viney playing dummy-half. Genius.”

• Poster 3: “Expected score after 30 seconds: 100. Actual score: 0.”

Quarter Time
Pies 4.2 (26) lead Dees 0.3 (3)

• Poster 4: “Can someone tell Bellamy we’re allowed to handball?”

• Poster 5: “Players look cooked already. He’s run them like Storm pre-season. They’ll be dead by half-time.”

• Poster 6: “Nah, this is a long game plan. Just wait until we grind them down in 6 months.”

Half Time
Pies 10.6 (66) lead Dees 1.5 (11)

• Poster 7: “What the hell is ‘fifth tackle option inside 50’?!”

• Poster 8: “At least Spargo’s finally been used properly. Bellamy’s made him waterboy.”

• Poster 9: “Conspiracy: AFL House sent Bellamy here to prepare us for Tasmania. WAKE UP PEOPLE.”

Three Quarter Time
Pies 14.8 (92) lead Dees 2.6 (18)

• Poster 10: “He just gave the boys a spray in rugby league terms. I think Trac’s been benched because he doesn’t know what a scrum is.”

• Poster 11: “Max Gawn looks like he’s about to retire mid-match. Bellamy’s cooked him.”

• Poster 12: “Sack him now. Bring back Goodwin. At least Goody believed in ‘connection.’”

Full Time
Collingwood 18.11 (119) d. Melbourne 3.8 (26)

• Poster 13: “Bellamy OUT. Season over.”

• Poster 14: “No, give him time. Premiership window opens in 2031 once we recruit three front-rowers.”

• Poster 15: “Reality: Demonland expected score 200 posts, actual score 3 insights.”

1 minute ago, Queanbeyan Demon said:

Full Time
Collingwood 18.11 (119) d. Melbourne 3.8 (26)

• Poster 13: “Bellamy OUT. Season over.”

• Poster 14: “No, give him time. Premiership window opens in 2031 once we recruit three front-rowers.”

• Poster 15: “Reality: Demonland expected score 200 posts, actual score 3 insights.”

Poster 16 (who shall remain anonymous): "This never would have happened if he just played Jeffo"

3 hours ago, Lucifers Hero said:

We got our revenge on Kelly and Geelong when we spoilt Corey Engright's 300th party, and twice in 2021: Max's goal after the siren to claim top spot and the shellacking we gave them in the 2021 PF.

Let bygones, be bygones!

Didn't we beat them 3 times in 2021?

57 minutes ago, Adam The God said:

Adam Unhinged The God. Has a nice ring to it.

YKYWT...

Misuse of stats has been discussed a bit recently on here. I think on On The Couch last night someone said 20 of the last 21 premiership coaches were coaching their first team. That proves first-timers can succeed but how many more are there compared to the 'second hand' ones? There are a lot of coaches that after 3 or 4 years every club has decided could never win a flag and he's moved on. Then very occasionally premiership coaches are tried at a new club. Only eleven are in this category this century. Honestly that's a pretty small sample especially given I could easily give four a mulligan: Sheedy with a brand new GWS club, Blight whose heart was never in it in his few months at St Kilda, Bomber Thompson forced to coach and Essendon team with a dozen plus drugs penalty suspension and our Roos probably doing as much as he could in three years with our completely rock bottom team.

I'm quite happy to see exact stats for the first-timers, second-timers and "flag-elsewhere" coaches. All I know is all are viable. And while statistically Buckey is probably our best option just if another candidate genuinely wows the board I'm very happy to believe he's the right choice.

2 hours ago, Adam The God said:

Adam Unhinged The God. Has a nice ring to it.

I’m starting to understand why you’re no longer binny’s PA

2 hours ago, Adam The God said:

Adam Unhinged The God. Has a nice ring to it.

I prefer Adam the unhinged god.

8 hours ago, Pulp Fritschon said:

Just get Bucks.

Get Caulfield.

CEO sounds good. Steve Smith.

Finally feel like we are getting serious as a footy club.

If all of those happen..

I thought the same thing during 2021; how great it was to finally be a serious and professional AFL team. Was very short-lived.

5 hours ago, Jack Vineys Anger Manager said:

Will we ask Kelly about all the times he was kept in detention at school as well? Geez.

Completely unrelated but sharing for a larf.

Years ago I went to a muso and footy star Q & A thing at the Corner Hotel with Cameron Ling and Paul Dempsey (Something for Kate).

Lingy said that James Kelly was notorious for starting tertiary courses but never finishing them, was pushing double figures apparently.

5 minutes ago, Ethan Tremblay said:

If all of those happen..

I thought the same thing during 2021; how great it was to finally be a serious and professional AFL team. Was very short-lived.

It feels like it takes an eternity to get there and a split second to knock it all down..

Listening to that reminded me of a discussion on how paint drys. What a load of waffle.

(My phone hasnt rung btw)

What's with the superfluous "it"?

7 minutes ago, Fritta and Turner said:

Listening to that reminded me of a discussion on how paint drys. What a load of waffle.

(My phone hasnt rung btw)

Have you checked if its on Silent Mode by mistake?

Caro on the Agenda Setters campaigning for Bucks to take the Tassie job and reckons people have advised him not to take the MFC gig.

1 minute ago, Bring-Back-Powell said:

Caro on the Agenda Setters campaigning for Bucks to take the Tassie job and reckons people have advised him not to take the MFC gig.

She's talking about herself.

4 minutes ago, Bring-Back-Powell said:

Caro on the Agenda Setters campaigning for Bucks to take the Tassie job and reckons people have advised him not to take the MFC gig.

I mean if Bucks doesn’t want to stand a chance of winning a premiership for a decade, go for it 🙄

Caro sounds like a dead set [censored]

Brendan Gale pulling some strings!

1 minute ago, adonski said:

Brendan Gale pulling some strings!

Seriously, how much are they paying her?

9 minutes ago, Bring-Back-Powell said:

Caro on the Agenda Setters campaigning for Bucks to take the Tassie job and reckons people have advised him not to take the MFC gig.

If that’s the case then why is he still involved in the coaching selection process.

Caro knows everything 🤮.

No one asked Caro 'why' people had advised Bux not to take the MFC job

Unbelievable from caro.

1 minute ago, Jack Vineys Anger Manager said:

Unbelievable from caro.

Well as of now he’s still in the process so Caro and Brendan gale might be telling him not to, that doesn’t mean he won’t listen.