Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Demonland

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

10 hours ago, Biffen said:

Your seedy lost weekends in the Seaside are safe with me.

I promise not to tell everyone what a twisted and  debauched glutton you can be when let loose on Fitzroy St.

No wonder why 2 out of every 3 shops on Fitzroy St are empty Biff... reputations lost when entertaining BBO, never to recover. It's why the dinosaurs no longer roam (outside of this thread, of course)

 
On 28 May 2016 at 8:24 PM, bjDee said:

I've recently found that a combined banana and chocolate protein shake is reasonably tasty - for a glutinous, artificially coloured and flavoured dose of Soylent Green.  But still not too pleased about the constipation effects.  Never experienced that before with REAL bananas and chocolate.

Woops - too much info?

and your initials bj stand for? No I suddenly understand, best left to ones imagination. 

1 minute ago, hemingway said:

and your initials bj stand for? No I suddenly understand, best left to ones imagination. 

banana juice obviously, ernest 

 
3 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

banana juice obviously, ernest 

Daisy your imagination is far better than mine or perhaps you are just a man with more varied and higher tastes. As one gets older, I find myself occasionally regressing to youthful thoughts and desires. It can get me into trouble particularly when I ask the lovely continental lass in the organic shop I attend whether she can help with a bj. I need to make it clear that I am asking for a banana juice thus avoiding the deep scratches she left me down both cheeks!

31 minutes ago, hemingway said:

Daisy your imagination is far better than mine or perhaps you are just a man with more varied and higher tastes. As one gets older, I find myself occasionally regressing to youthful thoughts and desires. It can get me into trouble particularly when I ask the lovely continental lass in the organic shop I attend whether she can help with a bj. I need to make it clear that I am asking for a banana juice thus avoiding the deep scratches she left me down both cheeks!

next time ernest you need to resist the urge to expose your banana. leave it in the bag unless the juice bar explicitly allows byo bananas


9 hours ago, hemingway said:

Daisy your imagination is far better than mine or perhaps you are just a man with more varied and higher tastes. As one gets older, I find myself occasionally regressing to youthful thoughts and desires. It can get me into trouble particularly when I ask the lovely continental lass in the organic shop I attend whether she can help with a bj. I need to make it clear that I am asking for a banana juice thus avoiding the deep scratches she left me down both cheeks!

Ernie you have haunted this thread for too long and allowed yourself to be seduced by the crass vulgarity of some posters. Your lofty moral standards have been torn asunder and your libertine self laid bare.

It becomes you.

Come now Bitters. Ernie was known to enjoy a tipple.....just saying :rolleyes: 

 

11 hours ago, hemingway said:

and your initials bj stand for? No I suddenly understand, best left to ones imagination. 

Not your best work Hem. 

 
2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Ernie you have haunted this thread for too long and allowed yourself to be seduced by the crass vulgarity of some posters. Your lofty moral standards have been torn asunder and your libertine self laid bare.

It becomes you.

Yes I have left myself down. I regret it and appreciate your sage advice. It's my unconscious Freudian mind getting the better of me

1 minute ago, hemingway said:

Yes I have left myself down. I regret it and appreciate your sage advice. It's my unconscious Freudian mind getting the better of me

Don't sweat it Ernest

We all have off days , mine tend to contain a Y :unsure:


19 minutes ago, bjDee said:

Not your best work Hem. 

Apologies Bj never again. I will take indefinite leave from this thread as punishment. 

 

On 5/28/2016 at 1:43 PM, Petraccattack said:

According to that moron Brad Scot, people are 'cowards' for calling out Lindsay Thomas for playing for free kicks.

Cant stand Scott, he regularly uses hyperbole and passive aggressive attacks every single week for the smallest of issues.  The irony is that he is the coward, nobody else.

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/afl/more-news/lindsay-thomas-draws-criticism-for-drawing-high-contact-free-kicks/news-story/4524389fc7155648048ba5dda5a3b022

Like to see Dermie return serve on this one. Derm called out Thomas on Friday night.

54 minutes ago, beelzebub said:

Come now Bitters. Ernie was known to enjoy a tipple.....just saying :rolleyes: 

 

That is true and i admit that I have recently been a little excessive with my alcohol intake due to a number of problems. I am trying my best to maintain the women and song but avoid wine but I am struggling. I have moved into wine country in an attempt to get some peace and quiet and have another attempt at a final novel. However. the realisation that I have lost my desire to write and also listening to the game on the weekend, sent me in search of a bottle or two of my favourite claret. And as you know, I am not an agreeable person after a few drinks. 

7 hours ago, hemingway said:

That is true and i admit that I have recently been a little excessive with my alcohol intake due to a number of problems. I am trying my best to maintain the women and song but avoid wine but I am struggling. I have moved into wine country in an attempt to get some peace and quiet and have another attempt at a final novel. However. the realisation that I have lost my desire to write and also listening to the game on the weekend, sent me in search of a bottle or two of my favourite claret. And as you know, I am not an agreeable person after a few drinks

It seems we share some important traits Ernie. Laudable all of them. However, if I may be so bold as to make a further suggestion to one of your (late) stature.

Forget the singing.

Don't mind Bitters Ernesto.

Word is he had a rather delicate " procedure" today involving a camera and A Dr from Moldovia who took liberties in his film making.

Uncle Bitters has reported the poor quack and now wants a second opinion  from someone with a real degree.

He is seeking drinking partners in order to avoid paying for his own box of wine.

Have no sympathy Ern, today Bitters is a depraved and selfish fascist who loves the accoutrements  and crueltyof bondage as much as your enemies in Spain.

 


1 hour ago, Biffen said:

Don't mind Bitters Ernesto.

Word is he had a rather delicate " procedure" today involving a camera and A Dr from Moldovia who took liberties in his film making.

Uncle Bitters has reported the poor quack and now wants a second opinion  from someone with a real degree.

He is seeking drinking partners in order to avoid paying for his own box of wine.

Have no sympathy Ern, today Bitters is a depraved and selfish fascist who loves the accoutrements  and crueltyof bondage as much as your enemies in Spain.

 

As long as the footage doesn't appear in Australia's funniest home videos I should think he would breathe a sigh of relief!!

19 hours ago, Biffen said:

Don't mind Bitters Ernesto.

Word is he had a rather delicate " procedure" today involving a camera and A Dr from Moldovia who took liberties in his film making.

Uncle Bitters has reported the poor quack and now wants a second opinion  from someone with a real degree.

He is seeking drinking partners in order to avoid paying for his own box of wine.

Have no sympathy Ern, today Bitters is a depraved and selfish fascist who loves the accoutrements  and crueltyof bondage as much as your enemies in Spain.

 

Biffen, the soul of indiscretion and purveyor of personal information! Makes Julian Assange look like a mute.

Of course like all of your ilk you pay no regard to the facts. My surgeon was not from Moldavia at all. He hails from Albania and has degrees from the University of Eastern Punjab (Correspondence Campus).

My only objection was the camera - It was one of those "Movietone News" wind ups and I considered it maybe a little uncomfortable.

So in in future I suggest you mind your vile rumourmongering or you shall be hearing from my solicitors!

Edited by Bitter but optimistic

6 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Biffen, the soul of indiscretion and purveyor of personal information! Makes Julian Assange look like a mute.

Of course like all of your ilk you pay no regard to the facts. My surgeon was not from Moldavia at all. He hails from Albania and has degrees from the University of Eastern Punjab (Correspondence Campus).

My only objection was the camera - It was one of those "Movietone News" wind ups and I considered it maybe a little uncomfortable.

So in in future I suggest you mind your vile rumourmongering or you shall be hearing from my solicitors!

The old fashioned camera didn't ring and alarm bells?

Although knowing some of your Perversions and your propensity for trying new revolting experiences I'm surprised you didn't invite the whole film crew.

On 30 May 2016 at 7:57 PM, picket fence said:

As long as the footage doesn't appear in Australia's funniest home videos I should think he would breathe a sigh of relief!!

Would you like a copy picket?


Smoothie time ;)

14 hours ago, daisycutter said:

********* BANANA ALERT *********

$1.50 Kg at Woolies

Woolly bananas??!

Is that like a banana wearing a knitted peter heater?

 
12 minutes ago, bjDee said:

Woolly bananas??!

Is that like a banana wearing a knitted peter heater?

that's very seminal, bj

  • Author
On 31 May 2016 at 0:58 PM, Bitter but optimistic said:

Biffen, the soul of indiscretion and purveyor of personal information! Makes Julian Assange look like a mute.

Of course like all of your ilk you pay no regard to the facts. My surgeon was not from Moldavia at all. He hails from Albania and has degrees from the University of Eastern Punjab (Correspondence Campus).

My only objection was the camera - It was one of those "Movietone News" wind ups and I considered it maybe a little uncomfortable.

So in in future I suggest you mind your vile rumourmongering or you shall be hearing from my solicitors!

Did someone call for a lawyer?


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • AFLW REPORT: Collingwood

    Expectations of a comfortable win for Narrm at Victoria Park quickly evaporated as the match turned into a tense nail-biter. After a confident start by the Demons, the Pies piled on pressure and forced red and blue supporters to hold their collective breath until after the final siren. In a frenetic, physical contest, it was Captain Kate’s clutch last quarter goal and a missed shot from Collingwood’s Grace Campbell after the siren which sealed a thrilling 4-point win. Finally, Narrm supporters could breathe easy.

    • 1 reply
  • CASEY: Williamstown

    The Casey Demons issued a strong statement to the remaining teams in the VFL race with a thumping 76-point victory in their Elimination Final against Williamstown. This was the sixth consecutive win for the Demons, who stormed into the finals from a long way back with scalps including two of the teams still in flag contention. Senior Coach Taylor Whitford would have been delighted with the manner in which his team opened its finals campaign with high impact after securing the lead early in the game when Jai Culley delivered a precise pass to a lead from Noah Yze, who scored his first of seven straight goals for the day. Yze kicked his second on the quarter time siren, by which time the Demons were already in control. The youngster repeated the dose in the second term as the Seagulls were reduced to mere

    • 0 replies
  • AFLW PREVIEW: Collingwood

    Narrm time isn’t a standard concept—it’s the time within the traditional lands of Narrm, the Woiwurrung name for Melbourne. Indigenous Round runs for rounds 3 and 4 and is a powerful platform to recognise the contributions of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples in sport, community, and Australian culture. This week, suburban footy returns to the infamous Victoria Park as the mighty Narrm take on the Collingwood Magpies at 1:05pm Narrm time, Sunday 31 August. Come along if you can.

    • 9 replies
  • AFLW REPORT: St. Kilda

    The Dees demolished the Saints in a comprehensive 74-pointshellacking.  We filled our boots with percentage — now a whopping 520.7% — and sit atop the AFLW ladder. Melbourne’s game plan is on fire, and the competition is officially on notice.

    • 4 replies
  • REPORT: Collingwood

    It was yet another disappointing outcome in a disappointing year, with Melbourne missing the finals for the second consecutive season. Indeed, it wasn’t even close, as the Demons' tally of seven wins was less than half the number required to rank among the top eight teams in the competition. When the dust of the game settled and supporters reflected on Melbourne's  six-point defeat at the hands of close game specialists Collingwood, Max Gawn's words about his team’s unfulfilled potential rang true … well, almost. 

    • 1 reply
  • POSTGAME: Collingwood

    Thank god this season is over. Bring on 2026.

      • Vomit
      • Thumb Down
      • Love
      • Like
    • 379 replies

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.