Melbourne's game plan has not changed this year!

Step 1 Handball to a fellow player close to an opposition player.

Step 2 If he still has the ball, handball to another fellow player close to another opposition player but ensure the ball is still in the same area it was at the start. On no account go forward nor kick the ball to a free player but simply ensure ball continues to go round in a small circle until an opposition player tackles you and takes the ball away. If that looks unlikely kick it backwards.

Step 3 If you happen to receive the ball with no opposition player in sight, stop look around,run a couple of slow steps but don't attempt to handball until the opposition player has tackled you.

Step 4 Don't play on when a fellow player is free. Wait until the oopposition player has caught up then kick the ball.

It is so depressing and I believe any person on this forum would have a better game plan than what we saw today (and every other week).

Well said Very amusing to read, but horrible to watch.

We are so reactive, it's frustrating to watch

when a team like Geelong get the ball three players down the line know exactly what they're going to do and start running into position

with Mfc we get the ball, sometimes we move it okay but we are so indecisive, don't run nearly hard enough to create options and seem to have almost no confidence

i can understand keeping it simple with a young group but i just can't for the life of me see a game plan or any sort of structure.

We are so reactive, it's frustrating to watch

when a team like Geelong get the ball three players down the line know exactly what they're going to do and start running into position

with Mfc we get the ball, sometimes we move it okay but we are so indecisive, don't run nearly hard enough to create options and seem to have almost no confidence

i can understand keeping it simple with a young group but i just can't for the life of me see a game plan or any sort of structure.

They dont spread its as simple as that.

I thought Rodan was good until he went off which was a pity.

Did Rodan do a knee? Sad if he did.

Melbourne's game plan has not changed this year!

Step 1 Handball to a fellow player close to an opposition player.

Step 2 If he still has the ball, handball to another fellow player close to another opposition player but ensure the ball is still in the same area it was at the start. On no account go forward nor kick the ball to a free player but simply ensure ball continues to go round in a small circle until an opposition player tackles you and takes the ball away. If that looks unlikely kick it backwards.

Step 3 If you happen to receive the ball with no opposition player in sight, stop look around,run a couple of slow steps but don't attempt to handball until the opposition player has tackled you.

Step 4 Don't play on when a fellow player is free. Wait until the oopposition player has caught up then kick the ball.

It is so depressing and I believe any person on this forum would have a better game plan than what we saw today (and every other week).

Clearly you haven't read any of Enyaw's posts.

Sylvia fumbles constantly under pressure. He's simply not a midfielder.

Watts won't use his body in a marking contest if he's half a chance of getting hurt.

Dunn piked it as usual.

Toumpas was OK, but is a mile off. Have a look at Crouch and the way he competes for the footy. Toumpas is a distributor, but he's not a ball winner - yet. Will be OK, and is feeling better about himself, but those getting a chubby would get a chubby over anything at the moment, such is our plight.

Grimes makes terrible decisions.

They were given 5 goals from undisciplined play or umpiring errors.

Not our worst performance. Get some more support in the middle and some more fire power up front and things can turn quicker than many think.

EDIT: Basil frigging Zempilas - if he said "Melbourne understands their role in this" one more time I'd hunt the ugly bast-ard down.

EDIT 2: For an ex-premiership captain Tom Harley is the most uninspiring commentator in the games. The annoying [censored] gives no insight whatsoever.

Edited August 24, 201312 yr by Ben-Hur

Have a happy birthday and forget about this season. It was a nightmare.

We'll win next week, just for Jaded, and she'll miss it!

Any chance someone at the club can tell jack grimes he's not quick & Dunn that when he is running out of defence not to turn around and handball it to a stationary player?

Frustrated!

Well they played 2goals better than I thought......where's the Bollinger !!!

Just listened to NC press conference - furious about our "lack of discipline" - giving away 50s etc. Couldn't help but think he was pretty frustrated by the umpiring.

If you haven't heard it, I reckon it's a pretty good listen.

From what I saw Lyndun Dunn was good. Toumpus had plenty of it but panics and gives the ball to players in worse positions and creates turnover goals. Watts effort was up. Pedersen read the game well. Grimes tried to break the lines but lacks pace and awareness.. Dawes is a

Class above.. Jones is the example of beating a tag. Frawley looks tired. Garland looks like a future Scarlett. Matt jones, Tapscott, need a rest and another pre season.. Terlich is a god send. Dean Kent is going to be better next year (looking forward to that!) Tom MacDonald has a crack and his kicking has come on!

And Howe.. Must have a farkin sore face lol.

Feel sorry for Rodan, he won't be able to do what we recruited him for.. Dance like a boss on the grand final footy show!

I don't what to say? We are young.. Because we sacked Bruce Green James mcDonald pushed Moloney out the door.,

And the most frustrating thing was watching Scott Thompson treat us with contempt., just imagine if he never left..,

Melbourne's game plan has not changed this year!

Step 1 Handball to a fellow player close to an opposition player.

Step 2 If he still has the ball, handball to another fellow player close to another opposition player but ensure the ball is still in the same area it was at the start. On no account go forward nor kick the ball to a free player but simply ensure ball continues to go round in a small circle until an opposition player tackles you and takes the ball away. If that looks unlikely kick it backwards.

Step 3 If you happen to receive the ball with no opposition player in sight, stop look around,run a couple of slow steps but don't attempt to handball until the opposition player has tackled you.

Step 4 Don't play on when a fellow player is free. Wait until the oopposition player has caught up then kick the ball.

It is so depressing and I believe any person on this forum would have a better game plan than what we saw today (and every other week).

Step 5 when kicking in after an opposition point make sure you kick to either a contest with three opposition players and one dees player, or direct to an opposition player, out on the full, wait until all players are manned up, get tackled because you have waited so long or run outside the goal square and get penalized.

Step 6 when rucking tap it direct to the best opposition midfielder.

Step 7 when playing in the midfield make sure you head straight back into the pack and get brought to ground.

Step 8 when kicking to a forward player make sure you kick it so high that it touches the tips of their outstretched fingers

Step 9 when you take a mark or are awarded a free kick wait as long as possible so you get tacked, kick it into the man on the mark or kick it to a contest because the opposition has had time to man up.

- The major focus of the broadcast today was just how wonderful the crows, their venue and their supporters all are. I wish someone would have had the BALLS to tell the truth and mention how fitting it is to have the last game play out like that: with the crows getting prime quality silver service from the umpires. Ah the memories, so many dodgy frees, so many undeserved wins. Could you believe it when Pedo got a free in the last quarter and they all went nuts booing!? Absolute minimum of 6 goals they cost us, what a friggin disgrace. In the last there was a free against Frawley (it was never shown even in replay, and the commentators didn't even mention it all) and you could hear Chip say to the ump 'you're killing us mate, you're absolutely killing us'.

- I don't think I have ever wanted a commentary box to burst into flames as much as I did today. What a pack of douchebags. They offer no valuable insight or analysis, are incredibly biased against Melbourne and talk more carp than I have ever heard. 'Sloane's got the golden locks but he plays hard footy'.. 'who will be the last player to be falconed at this ground' 'did you kinow the record for most individual goalkickers is intact' .. of my favourite line of the day re: the Mexican wave.. it is good to see ppl support something in football that originated in Mexico.. yeah fantastic, brilliant, topical, amusing comments there fhead... OMG. If ever see 'Baz' in person I am going to kick him in the face that absolute tool.

- As usual we enjoyed not one but two periods of the books completely stopping to conceded an avalnche of goals. It must be part of our punishment for them to show they can match it with anyone for 50-75% of a football game and get absolutely murdered in the other parts. This is clearly a mental/emotional syndrome and that is all you need to know about whether or not Craig should be any chance of staying on.

-Grimes FFS you clanger machine. M.Jones, Viney gave us zero. Another 2 kicks for Jordie. Tapscott, Pederson hopeless. With Rodan out early you can't have that much fail in one side.

hurry up and end you steaming terrd of a season

Did Rodan do a knee? Sad if he did.

I think he did as he had ice on it during the game I think but then in the match report it said his injury was an ankle. So not sure yet what is going on but was bad as he did not come back on and was subbed pretty much straight away.

I doubt that Rodan will play next year. Anywhere.

Sylvia fumbles constantly under pressure. He's simply not a midfielder.

Watts won't use his body in a marking contest if he's half a chance of getting hurt.

Dunn piked it as usual.

Toumpas was OK, but is a mile off. Have a look at Crouch and the way he competes for the footy. Toumpas is a distributor, but he's not a ball winner - yet. Will be OK, and is feeling better about himself, but those getting a chubby would get a chubby over anything at the moment, such is our plight.

Grimes makes terrible decisions.

They were given 5 goals from undisciplined play or umpiring errors.

Not our worst performance. Get some more support in the middle and some more fire power up front and things can turn quicker than many think.

EDIT: Basil frigging Zempilas - if he said "Melbourne understands their role in this" one more time I'd hunt the ugly bast-ard down.

EDIT 2: For an ex-premiership captain Tom Harley is the most uninspiring commentator in the games. The annoying [censored] gives no insight whatsoever.

I will join you in the hunting party. The only reason he gets a gig is because he looks and sounds a bit like Dennis, maybe some nepotism at 7.

As for Harley, he just doesn't do his homework. This is not unusual with a lot of commentators though. His call on Howe having a good season was way off the mark.

You are spot on with Col, he's never been a mid. He doesn't have enough awareness or football smarts and as you say his hands are not clean.

Crouch is a Joel Selwood type, really strong at the ball and any player that gets in his way. His brother is the same and it's why we should have a good look at him.

Edited August 24, 201312 yr by rjay

Adelaide had 11 individual goalkickers.

We had 4.

This is been a problem for far too long.

We need some quality delivery into our forward 50 as well as some goal kicking mid-fielders or we will be stuck scoring 6 to 7 goals a game for the foreseeable future.

- The major focus of the broadcast today was just how wonderful the crows, their venue and their supporters all are.

...................

- I don't think I have ever wanted a commentary box to burst into flames as much as I did today. What a pack of douchebags. They offer no valuable insight or analysis, are incredibly biased against Melbourne and talk more carp than I have ever heard. 'Sloane's got the golden locks but he plays hard footy'.. 'who will be the last player to be falconed at this ground' 'did you kinow the record for most individual goalkickers is intact' .. of my favourite line of the day re: the Mexican wave.. it is good to see ppl support something in football that originated in Mexico.. yeah fantastic, brilliant, topical, amusing comments there fhead... OMG. If ever see 'Baz' in person I am going to kick him in the face that absolute tool.

.......................

Clearly, you have never lived/stayed in Adelaide. The commentary is bogan...usually they don't know the opposition players names........

ABC commentary no better ....idiot Peter Walsh.

You just gotta turn the sound off.

Clearly, you have never lived/stayed in Adelaide. The commentary is bogan...usually they don't know the opposition players names........

ABC commentary no better ....[censored] Peter Walsh.

You just gotta turn the sound off.

Hamish McGlachlan has an Adelaide link doesn't he, besides that it was Baz Zemplis was it not and who knows who the special comments clowns were but either way I don't think they were from SA.

My point is it wasn't SA pump up SA it was channel 7 who are so stupid they actually think its fitting to celebrate like crazy how good a stadium is when it's about to be decommissioned from AFL. They also didn't realise Port play a huge game there next week!

They also got stuck into Watts for his trade mark goal celebration where he points and claps the guy who set the goal up for him. There are 100 bad things you can get stuck into Watts for yet they pick a good thing!

Edit: Actually it was Tom Harley, ex SA, ex Geelong, now in Sydney. Obvious a bloke who has no idea what a real city is and has managed to avoid Melbourne - which is probably a good thing for the rest of us!

They also got stuck into Watts for his trade mark goal celebration where he points and claps the guy who set the goal up for him.

I could not believe that. WTF is wrong with that? Go F yourself Harley you add absolutely zero to a commentary team.. why don't you and 'Baz' get a room you butt pirate

I will join you in the hunting party. The only reason he gets a gig is because he looks and sounds a bit like Dennis, maybe some nepotism at 7.

As for Harley, he just doesn't do his homework. This is not unusual with a lot of commentators though. His call on Howe having a good season was way off the mark.

You are spot on with Col, he's never been a mid. He doesn't have enough awareness or football smarts and as you say his hands are not clean.

Crouch is a Joel Selwood type, really strong at the ball and any player that gets in his way. His brother is the same and it's why we should have a good look at him.

Considering we can't hit targets to save ourselves, he'd need to slip - or we'd need to trade for a mid first rounder.

One thing about James Aish is that the kid can hit a target and as much as I rave on about Toumpas been soft, he can also hit targets.

Our kicking is woeful and I agree we need ball hunters, but we also need good users of the ball and Crouch has question marks in that area.

If we can draft some quality ball users early, like Aish and perhaps Kelly, then we should be able to get a ball winner at 20/21 in Dumont, Crouch, Sheed or Dunstan, whatever the case, there will be an in an under type around that pick, they can't all go in the first round.

I could not believe that. WTF is wrong with that? Go F yourself Harley you add absolutely zero to a commentary team.. why don't you and 'Baz' get a room you butt pirate

Tom "I can sum up my Port career in one second' Harley, then continues to describe his Geelong career for most of the next broad cast. Complete [censored]. And if Baz is the best commentator in Perth can you imagine the worst?

pederson is done at AFL level, would trade him back for gysberts in a heart beat

Would trade him back to North for nothing and would pay his contract for the next two years as well.

- The major focus of the broadcast today was just how wonderful the crows, their venue and their supporters all are. I wish someone would have had the BALLS to tell the truth and mention how fitting it is to have the last game play out like that: with the crows getting prime quality silver service from the umpires. Ah the memories, so many dodgy frees, so many undeserved wins. Could you believe it when Pedo got a free in the last quarter and they all went nuts booing!? Absolute minimum of 6 goals they cost us, what a friggin disgrace. In the last there was a free against Frawley (it was never shown even in replay, and the commentators didn't even mention it all) and you could hear Chip say to the ump 'you're killing us mate, you're absolutely killing us'.

- I don't think I have ever wanted a commentary box to burst into flames as much as I did today. What a pack of douchebags. They offer no valuable insight or analysis, are incredibly biased against Melbourne and talk more carp than I have ever heard. 'Sloane's got the golden locks but he plays hard footy'.. 'who will be the last player to be falconed at this ground' 'did you kinow the record for most individual goalkickers is intact' .. of my favourite line of the day re: the Mexican wave.. it is good to see ppl support something in football that originated in Mexico.. yeah fantastic, brilliant, topical, amusing comments there fhead... OMG. If ever see 'Baz' in person I am going to kick him in the face that absolute tool.

- As usual we enjoyed not one but two periods of the books completely stopping to conceded an avalnche of goals. It must be part of our punishment for them to show they can match it with anyone for 50-75% of a football game and get absolutely murdered in the other parts. This is clearly a mental/emotional syndrome and that is all you need to know about whether or not Craig should be any chance of staying on.

-Grimes FFS you clanger machine. M.Jones, Viney gave us zero. Another 2 kicks for Jordie. Tapscott, Pederson hopeless. With Rodan out early you can't have that much fail in one side.

hurry up and end you steaming terrd of a season

Never been a thief in my life, but,stole your second paragraph and sent it to the afl. Well hope I sent it to the afl, because it's probably the best paragraph I've read on here in two years.