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Describing the Collingwood football club

The Emblem

By The Emblem
in Melbourne Demons

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The Emblem Mighty Demon

The Emblem   1

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Just had a conversation with a rugby mad bokka bokka who could'nt understand why it is that everyone hates the Collingwood football club so much.

He finally got the message via the following joke:

Q/ What do you call a Collingwood supporter with three teeth & two brain cells?

A/ "A catch"

What's your description?

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45HG Trident

45HG   1,539

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A primary teacher starts a new job at a school in Collingwood and, trying to make a good impression on her first day, explains to her class that she is a Collingwood fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they, too, are Collingwood fans.

Everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl.

The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says: "Mary, why didn't you raise your hand?"

"Because I'm not a Collingwood fan," she replied.

The teacher, still shocked, asked: "Well, if you're not a Collingwood fan, then who are you a fan of?"

"I'm a Richmond fan, and proud of it," Mary replied.

The teacher could not believe her ears. "Mary, why are you a Richmond fan?"

"My mum and dad were born and raised in Richmond, so my mum is a Richmond fan and my dad is a Richmond fan, and so I'm a Richmond fan too!"

"Well," said the teacher, in an obviously annoyed tone, "that's no reason for you to be a Richmond fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mum was a prostitute, your dad was a drug addict and your brother was a car thief, what would you be then?"

"Then," Mary said, "I'd be a Collingwood fan."

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My wife and I were having a few drinks and had a couple too many...she dragged me off to the bedroom and yelled.."humiliate me...humiliate me"...

So I went out and brought her a Collingwood jumper

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titan_uranus Legend

titan_uranus   24,873

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Q: "What do you call one group of people who thinks they're better than another group of people?"

A: "Prejudiced."

You're kidding right? You call yourself a football supporter and you don't like a Collingwood joke?

Seriously, though, why must everything be so PC these days? I take it then you wouldn't find jokes about blondes, red-heads, men, women, snobs or any other type of person funny then?

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Guest Schtacker  

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Q: "What do you call one group of people who thinks they're better than another group of people?"

A: "Prejudiced."

You're damn right I am prejudiced against Collingwood.

Whenever I hear the phrase 'level playing field' I think of them immediately. They have every single advantage that we don't - from a fully-funded footy department, to facilities and staff, to a RIGGED FIXTURE BOTH FINANCIALLY AND FOOTBALL-WISE, to larger crowds and advantages from the umpires, to their ability to recruit star players. Their existence is indirectly killing ours. Most of them you see at the ground are a pick of filthy cretins, and most of them would be happy to see developments like free agency come in to wipe us poor clubs out. Not to mention every time you meet a fairweather, bandwagoned DHead he is invariably a Collingwood or Essendon 'fan'. At least with all this, the pr!cks have only managed 1 flag in 50 years!

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Tigers Dayz Demon

Tigers Dayz   2

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You're damn right I am prejudiced against Collingwood.

Whenever I hear the phrase 'level playing field' I think of them immediately. They have every single advantage that we don't - from a fully-funded footy department, to facilities and staff, to a RIGGED FIXTURE BOTH FINANCIALLY AND FOOTBALL-WISE, to larger crowds and advantages from the umpires, to their ability to recruit star players. Their existence is indirectly killing ours. Most of them you see at the ground are a pick of filthy cretins, and most of them would be happy to see developments like free agency come in to wipe us poor clubs out. Not to mention every time you meet a fairweather, bandwagoned DHead he is invariably a Collingwood or Essendon 'fan'. At least with all this, the pr!cks have only managed 1 flag in 50 years!

Mate... you're, you're, you're bordering on oracle status. Love your work....

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45HG Trident

45HG   1,539

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Absolutely, if you don't hate Collingwood, find a new sport to follow.

All this reminds me of the Federal Minister found dead wearing a Collingwood jumper. His family had to quickly dress him in women's clothing to hide the embarrasment

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H_T Legend

H_T   3,038

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Absolutely, if you don't hate Collingwood, find a new sport to follow.

All this reminds me of the Federal Minister found dead wearing a Collingwood jumper. His family had to quickly dress him in women's clothing to hide the embarrasment

:lol: I Like it. I'll have to mention that one to my uncles who are Collingwood Filth.. :lol:

HERE'S SOME MORE

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beelzebub Legend

beelzebub   23,242

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There are three kinds of people on this world

Men, Women

and

Collingwood supporters !!

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45HG Trident

45HG   1,539

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Or the old classic, pretty sure I read it on these boards a few months ago.

You're locked into a room with a Tiger, a Lyon, a Snake and a Collingood supporter. You have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?

Shoot the Collingwood supporter...Twice!

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Chook Legend

Chook   15,001

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using the term retarded in a derogatory sense whilst preaching about prejudice... Ironic

Exactly. Shut up Chook.

Retarded, as in "not doing its job correctly," i.e. "the economy's growth was retarded by the advent of war."

I'm sorry if I don't think that filling a thread, which was supposed to give suggestions about how to educate a non-football follower about the Collingwood Football Club, with bad, insulting jokes, is something to be proud of.

But it's none of my business. I don't like what y'all are doing, but who cares? I'm not going to spoil your fun.

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45HG Trident

45HG   1,539

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Sorry Chook, but you can't be serious here.

The thread was designed entirely to pose ludicrous jokes. Of course the intention of the thread is not to "educate a non-football follower about the Collingwood Football club," this is emphasized by the thread originator using a "bad, insulting joke" to illustrate how he eventually got his point across.

Perhaps I.A.N. can tell us of his purpose, but I don't really think he needs to.

If his purpose is to share jokes about he Collingwood footy club, which most of us here believe, then the thread is only being "retarded" (impeded) by your good self

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Chook Legend

Chook   15,001

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Sorry Chook, but you can't be serious here.

The thread was designed entirely to pose ludicrous jokes. Of course the intention of the thread is not to "educate a non-football follower about the Collingwood Football club," this is emphasized by the thread originator using a "bad, insulting joke" to illustrate how he eventually got his point across.

Perhaps I.A.N. can tell us of his purpose, but I don't really think he needs to.

If his purpose is to share jokes about he Collingwood footy club, which most of us here believe, then the thread is only being "retarded" (impeded) by your good self

Yep, all right. I'll admit when I'm wrong. Re-reading the original post, my comments, and those of everyone else, I now totally agree with you all, and will promptly shut up, as suggested. Thank you and good night.

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The Emblem Mighty Demon

The Emblem   1

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Yep, all right. I'll admit when I'm wrong. Re-reading the original post, my comments, and those of everyone else, I now totally agree with you all, and will promptly shut up, as suggested. Thank you and good night.

Not a very serious thread at all, just sharing a moment "when the lights went on" for the South African. As for thread being described as retarded, considering the old jokes that were likely to be recycled, may I offer a compromise and we agree to describe the thread as "re-treaded".

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