Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Demonland

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

2 minutes ago, Moonshadow said:

I suggest you take your helicopter and land on the ground, in the style of Peter Hudson, with a team of pompom waving cheerleaders escorting you to your seat.

The pink helicopter is being serviced, Bronnie may have a special offer on hers.

Image result for bronwyn helicopter

 
4 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

I suggest you take your helicopter and land on the ground, in the style of Peter Hudson, with a team of pompom waving cheerleaders escorting you to your seat.

 

7 hours ago, beelzebub said:

tram 109    stop 127

In your dressed down camouflage and assuming you will travel to Spencer Street; then pop across road and catch the Port Melbourne tram. There is a stop assigned for the oval. Should not trouble one such as yourself too much !!

Thank you bb! It is reassuring to know there are still gentlemen in this world who can give a lucid and polite reply to a genuine request.

 

Unlike others.

20 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

 

Thank you bb! It is reassuring to know there are still gentlemen in this world who can give a lucid and polite reply to a genuine request.

 

Unlike others.

Rare now Bbo. Like you I feel reassured that there still people of this quality left amongst us.

 
23 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

 

Thank you bb! It is reassuring to know there are still gentlemen in this world who can give a lucid and polite reply to a genuine request.

 

Unlike others.

I thought my suggestion to be practical as well as satisfying your fantasies. Sorry for being an ideas man and thinking outside the square

40 minutes ago, Moonshadow said:

I thought my suggestion to be practical as well as satisfying your fantasies. Sorry for being an ideas man and thinking outside the square

Well Moonie, you should have known that if anyone was to wear pompoms it would be me!

 


2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well Moonie, you should have known that if anyone was to wear pompoms it would be me!

 

I found myself thinking "what would jazza have made of that?" and it was hard not to laugh ... :)

12 hours ago, Red and Bluebeard said:

I found myself thinking "what would jazza have made of that?" and it was hard not to laugh ... :)

Yeah, cant help but miss old Jizza. Poor bastard, it can be a harsh world we live in.

I hate to get maudlin but having read the Sin and the Rage over breakfast, I can only feel more depressed at the state of the world we live in.

On 13/09/2016 at 9:41 AM, Bitter but optimistic said:

Yeah, cant help but miss old Jizza. Poor bastard, it can be a harsh world we live in.

I hate to get maudlin but having read the Sin and the Rage over breakfast, I can only feel more depressed at the state of the world we live in.

[Channelling my inner jazza]: Come off it you old grump! Go play with your pretend cows or something! Us real workers have had lunch before you are awake! I don't have time to read the papers, but if I did and they depressed me, I wouldn't read 'em! Man up, mate! :blink::lol:

 

 

 
42 minutes ago, Moonshadow said:

I reckon he'd say "toughen up!"

So let's do it (digitally).

Not sure where you're going there Moonie??  Do I detect a prostate awareness campaign coming on?

But it did bring to my mind that famous song by Olivia Neutron Bomb : Let's Get Digital....


2 minutes ago, bjDee said:

Not sure where you're going there Moonie??  Do I detect a prostate awareness campaign coming on?

But it did bring to my mind that famous song by Olivia Neutron Bomb : Let's Get Digital....

Whatever tickles your pickle bjd. Sounds like you're already there!

Well it is mission accomplished as far as I am concerned

Two months ago I conceived a cunning plan to derail the Hawk's 4peat campaign, they were on a 7 game winning streak, had beaten the Swans in Sydney, demolished the Tigers and had moved 2 games clear on top of the ladder and they were giving me the shytes no end. And as the wife and in-laws are all mad hawks supporters there was a high level of tension in the household every Dawks game night as I have a developed a pathological hatred for them over the years for obvious reasons.

My plan was simply to place a large bet on them to win the flag. I haven't placed a bet on anything for 20 years because I have never won so much as a football club raffle in years of buying raffle tickets for local causes and as for horses or tattslotto forget it. In short I had put the "Curse of The Hood" on the team.

Once the bet was laid at 4.5 to 1 in my new Sportsbet account, I found I was totally calm on game night and was quite happy for the Dawks to smash their opponents. It was quite therapeutic actually.  And I really did think the Dawks were a real chance to win the flag as their main competitors were looking to be in average form.  And the winnings would go toward my next project to buy a C3 corvette stingray that my wife believes is utter folly. She keeps saying it is impractical to buy a 40 year old, gas guzzling, 2 seater with barely enough luggage space to store a tennis racquet. I mean really what would she know! 

A few weeks later I watch the Dees beat them for the first time in 10 years, Stratton goes down, then the Weagles stitch them up and Ceglar goes down and all of a sudden the team looks old and slow but still has some fight left. And they certainly looked slow on Friday night as the Bulldogs ran all over them. Mitchell, Hodge and Gibson all seemed to be losing form over the last few weeks and they looked very human and battle scarred.

Poor Clarko must have been scratching his head and the sports journo's as to what went wrong but now you all know the real reason.

Looks like I will have to save a bit longer for the Corvette

But please remember to gamble responsibly!

 

Edited by Earl Hood

1 hour ago, Earl Hood said:

Well it is mission accomplished as far as I am concerned

Two months ago I conceived a cunning plan to derail the Hawk's 4peat campaign, they were on a 7 game winning streak, had beaten the Swans in Sydney, demolished the Tigers and had moved 2 games clear on top of the ladder and they were giving me the shytes no end. And as the wife and in-laws are all mad hawks supporters there was a high level of tension in the household every Dawks game night as I have a developed a pathological hatred for them over the years for obvious reasons.

My plan was simply to place a large bet on them to win the flag. I haven't placed a bet on anything for 20 years because I have never won so much as a football club raffle in years of buying raffle tickets for local causes and as for horses or tattslotto forget it. In short I had put the "Curse of The Hood" on the team.

Once the bet was laid at 4.5 to 1 in my new Sportsbet account, I found I was totally calm on game night and was quite happy for the Dawks to smash their opponents. It was quite therapeutic actually.  And I really did think the Dawks were a real chance to win the flag as there main competitors were looking to be in average form.  And the winnings would go toward my next project to buy a C3 corvette stingray that my wife believes is utter folly. She keeps saying it is impractical to buy a 40 year old, gas guzzling, 2 seater with barely enough luggage space to store a tennis racquet. Really.

A few weeks later I watch the Dees beat them for the first time in 10 years, Stratton goes down, then the Weagles stitch them up and Ceglar goes down and all of a sudden the team looks old and slow but still has some fight left. And they certainly looked slow on Friday night as the Bulldogs ran all over them. Mitchell, Hodge and Gibson all seemed to be losing form over the last few weeks and they looked very human and battle scarred.

Poor Clarko must have been scratching his head and the sports journo's as to what went wrong but now you all know the real reason.

Looks like I will have to save a bit longer for the Corvette

But please remember to gamble responsibly!

 

Well done Earl !!!! You've taken a hit to the wallet in a bid to topple the Evil Empire !!! And it's paid off.  I went to the game on Friday and was vociferous in my support for the doggies. I joined in in a tender moment by the crowd as we booed the Hawks from the field at half time. Right in front of the Hawthorn cheer squad which wasn't so much cheering the Hawks as sitting there mute. I called one of the maggots a criminal when he ignored a blatant free which should have gone Footscrays way and suggested at one point that they give Hodge a whistle. The Hawks fans around me didn't like my comment that Hill will enjoy Perth after his stuff up gifted the doggies a goal. I discovered today that my Hawthorn supporting doctor had been sitting behind me listening to my running commentary and he seemed a bit cool when taking my blood pressure. He will get over it eventually. I will probably get over the smugness and the arrogance of the average Hawks fan during these last several years but it might take somewhat longer. Right now I'm enjoying the derailment of the Hawthorn juggernaut like all right thinking footy fans will be. Let's hope the report of the death of the Hawthorn Football club has not been exaggerated.

2 hours ago, Earl Hood said:

Well it is mission accomplished as far as I am concerned

Two months ago I conceived a cunning plan to derail the Hawk's 4peat campaign, they were on a 7 game winning streak, had beaten the Swans in Sydney, demolished the Tigers and had moved 2 games clear on top of the ladder and they were giving me the shytes no end. And as the wife and in-laws are all mad hawks supporters there was a high level of tension in the household every Dawks game night as I have a developed a pathological hatred for them over the years for obvious reasons.

My plan was simply to place a large bet on them to win the flag. I haven't placed a bet on anything for 20 years because I have never won so much as a football club raffle in years of buying raffle tickets for local causes and as for horses or tattslotto forget it. In short I had put the "Curse of The Hood" on the team.

Once the bet was laid at 4.5 to 1 in my new Sportsbet account, I found I was totally calm on game night and was quite happy for the Dawks to smash their opponents. It was quite therapeutic actually.  And I really did think the Dawks were a real chance to win the flag as there main competitors were looking to be in average form.  And the winnings would go toward my next project to buy a C3 corvette stingray that my wife believes is utter folly. She keeps saying it is impractical to buy a 40 year old, gas guzzling, 2 seater with barely enough luggage space to store a tennis racquet. Really.

A few weeks later I watch the Dees beat them for the first time in 10 years, Stratton goes down, then the Weagles stitch them up and Ceglar goes down and all of a sudden the team looks old and slow but still has some fight left. And they certainly looked slow on Friday night as the Bulldogs ran all over them. Mitchell, Hodge and Gibson all seemed to be losing form over the last few weeks and they looked very human and battle scarred.

Poor Clarko must have been scratching his head and the sports journo's as to what went wrong but now you all know the real reason.

Looks like I will have to save a bit longer for the Corvette

But please remember to gamble responsibly!

 

So when the Dees are struggling next year, Earl, can we pass around the hat so that you can put a few dollars on the Dees not making a preliminary final? :lol:


On ‎9‎/‎19‎/‎2016 at 6:09 PM, Earl Hood said:

Well it is mission accomplished as far as I am concerned

Two months ago I conceived a cunning plan to derail the Hawk's 4peat campaign, they were on a 7 game winning streak, had beaten the Swans in Sydney, demolished the Tigers and had moved 2 games clear on top of the ladder and they were giving me the shytes no end. And as the wife and in-laws are all mad hawks supporters there was a high level of tension in the household every Dawks game night as I have a developed a pathological hatred for them over the years for obvious reasons.

My plan was simply to place a large bet on them to win the flag. I haven't placed a bet on anything for 20 years because I have never won so much as a football club raffle in years of buying raffle tickets for local causes and as for horses or tattslotto forget it. In short I had put the "Curse of The Hood" on the team.

Once the bet was laid at 4.5 to 1 in my new Sportsbet account, I found I was totally calm on game night and was quite happy for the Dawks to smash their opponents. It was quite therapeutic actually.  And I really did think the Dawks were a real chance to win the flag as their main competitors were looking to be in average form.  And the winnings would go toward my next project to buy a C3 corvette stingray that my wife believes is utter folly. She keeps saying it is impractical to buy a 40 year old, gas guzzling, 2 seater with barely enough luggage space to store a tennis racquet. I mean really what would she know! 

A few weeks later I watch the Dees beat them for the first time in 10 years, Stratton goes down, then the Weagles stitch them up and Ceglar goes down and all of a sudden the team looks old and slow but still has some fight left. And they certainly looked slow on Friday night as the Bulldogs ran all over them. Mitchell, Hodge and Gibson all seemed to be losing form over the last few weeks and they looked very human and battle scarred.

Poor Clarko must have been scratching his head and the sports journo's as to what went wrong but now you all know the real reason.

Looks like I will have to save a bit longer for the Corvette

But please remember to gamble responsibly!

 

Jolly decent of you to take one for the team Earl - particularly since have suffered some other financial setbacks of late.

However a word of caution. It does not do for we of the well to do class to show signs of generosity. It leads to no good.

It can set an unwanted tone and before you know it exploited workers are seeking a pay rise. Next thing those numeric visa types will want to move out of the back shed and demand fresh water.

We don't want to sow the seeds of revolution do we?

On a personal note, perhaps the good "Lady Hood" would be more amenable to the corvette if she wasn't concerned that you may use it to parade the hirstute Conchita?

Oh well toodle pip. I think shall give some of the staff a jolly good flogging.

Edited by Bitter but optimistic

  • Author

Chance of a flag for some Demon players this weekend. Hope they are not affected by Etihad.

Just now, Redleg said:

Chance of a flag for some Demon players this weekend. Hope they are not affected by Etihad.

nervous times ahead, red. i hope they blitz them in the first quarter for the sake of my blood pressure

21 hours ago, daisycutter said:

nervous times ahead, red. i hope they blitz them in the first quarter for the sake of my blood pressure

Well if events become too stressful dc, I'm sure you'll find a bluerinser or two for some diversion therapy.

1 hour ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well if events become too stressful dc, I'm sure you'll find a bluerinser or two for some diversion therapy.

that would be doubly climactic, uncle. definitely a coronary overload to be avoided on sunday.    sat night?......well that's a different story


1 hour ago, daisycutter said:

that would be doubly climactic, uncle. definitely a coronary overload to be avoided on sunday.    sat night?......well that's a different story

Well at least you would be ... err ... going down in the line of duty dc. Who knows you might even equal (or better) the formidable record set by Sir Billy!

2 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well at least you would be ... err ... going down in the line of duty dc. Who knows you might even equal (or better) the formidable record set by Sir Billy!

I  don't know, I added a starsky and Hutch stripe to a white HT Holden in the late seventies and the girls thought I was a sensation!! Plenty wanted to do a round with the FENCE!! No strings attached!!

43 minutes ago, picket fence said:

I  don't know, I added a starsky and Hutch stripe to a white HT Holden in the late seventies and the girls thought I was a sensation!! Plenty wanted to do a round with the FENCE!! No strings attached!!

Bwahaha Bwahahaha! Thanks picket that's comedy gold!!! You a "sensation " !!!!!  Bwahaha!!!!

I haven't laughed so much since the peacock went under the ride on mower.

 
3 hours ago, picket fence said:

I  don't know, I added a starsky and Hutch stripe to a white HT Holden in the late seventies and the girls thought I was a sensation!! Plenty wanted to do a round with the FENCE!! No strings attached!!

Couldn't get your hand off the old Picket gear stick, eh? Careful of reverse!

5 hours ago, picket fence said:

I  don't know, I added a starsky and Hutch stripe to a white HT Holden in the late seventies and the girls thought I was a sensation!! Plenty wanted to do a round with the FENCE!! No strings attached!!

A round with The Fence in a white HT Holden. The tastes suggest that the girls were all class. Even if you take the Holden or the Fence out of the picture.  


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • AFLW REPORT: Collingwood

    Expectations of a comfortable win for Narrm at Victoria Park quickly evaporated as the match turned into a tense nail-biter. After a confident start by the Demons, the Pies piled on pressure and forced red and blue supporters to hold their collective breath until after the final siren. In a frenetic, physical contest, it was Captain Kate’s clutch last quarter goal and a missed shot from Collingwood’s Grace Campbell after the siren which sealed a thrilling 4-point win. Finally, Narrm supporters could breathe easy.

      • Thumb Down
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 1 reply
  • CASEY: Williamstown

    The Casey Demons issued a strong statement to the remaining teams in the VFL race with a thumping 76-point victory in their Elimination Final against Williamstown. This was the sixth consecutive win for the Demons, who stormed into the finals from a long way back with scalps including two of the teams still in flag contention. Senior Coach Taylor Whitford would have been delighted with the manner in which his team opened its finals campaign with high impact after securing the lead early in the game when Jai Culley delivered a precise pass to a lead from Noah Yze, who scored his first of seven straight goals for the day. Yze kicked his second on the quarter time siren, by which time the Demons were already in control. The youngster repeated the dose in the second term as the Seagulls were reduced to mere

      • Thanks
    • 0 replies
  • AFLW PREVIEW: Collingwood

    Narrm time isn’t a standard concept—it’s the time within the traditional lands of Narrm, the Woiwurrung name for Melbourne. Indigenous Round runs for rounds 3 and 4 and is a powerful platform to recognise the contributions of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples in sport, community, and Australian culture. This week, suburban footy returns to the infamous Victoria Park as the mighty Narrm take on the Collingwood Magpies at 1:05pm Narrm time, Sunday 31 August. Come along if you can.

      • Thumb Down
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 9 replies
  • AFLW REPORT: St. Kilda

    The Dees demolished the Saints in a comprehensive 74-pointshellacking.  We filled our boots with percentage — now a whopping 520.7% — and sit atop the AFLW ladder. Melbourne’s game plan is on fire, and the competition is officially on notice.

      • Clap
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 4 replies
  • REPORT: Collingwood

    It was yet another disappointing outcome in a disappointing year, with Melbourne missing the finals for the second consecutive season. Indeed, it wasn’t even close, as the Demons' tally of seven wins was less than half the number required to rank among the top eight teams in the competition. When the dust of the game settled and supporters reflected on Melbourne's  six-point defeat at the hands of close game specialists Collingwood, Max Gawn's words about his team’s unfulfilled potential rang true … well, almost. 

      • Thanks
    • 1 reply
  • POSTGAME: Collingwood

    Thank god this season is over. Bring on 2026.

      • Clap
      • Like
    • 379 replies

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.