HATCH MATCH & DESPATCH 2024

[Demonland 71,081]

Rory Sloane’s retirement announcement coming on top of the medical retirements of Angus Brayshaw and Nathan Murphy bring us to this year’s HATCH MATCH & DESPATCH thread. 

There will be many more to come over the next six months or so - here’s this year’s version of the ins and outs at the AFL Clubs ~

ADELAIDE 

In: Isaac Cumming (GWS Giants) Alex Neal-Bullen (Melbourne) James Peatling (GWS Giants)

Out: Lachlan Gollant (delisted) Will Hamill (delisted) Elliott Himmelberg (Gold Coast Suns) Ned McHenry (delisted) Patrick Parnell (delisted) Rory Sloane (retired)

BRISBANE LIONS 

In:

Out: Darcy Craven (delisted) Joe Daniher (retired Darragh Joyce (delisted) Kalin Lane (delisted) Jarryd Lyons (retired) James Madden (delisted) Carter Michael (delisted) Jaxon Prior (delisted) Harry Sharp (Melbourne)

CARLTON 

In: Nick Haynes (GWS Giants)

Out: Dom Akuei (delisted) Jack Carroll (delisted) Matt Carroll (delisted) David Cuningham (delisted) Sam Durdin (delisted) Matt Kennedy (Western Bulldogs) Caleb Marchbank (delisted) Jack Martin (delisted) Alex Mirkov (delisted) Matt Owies (West Coast Eagles)

COLLINGWOOD

In: Dan Houston (Port Adelaide) Nathan Krueger (delisted) Tim Membrey (St Kilda) Harry Perryman (GWS Giants)

Out: Aiden Begg (delisted) Jack Bytel (delisted) Josh Carmichael (retired) Josh Eyre (delisted) Ash Johnson (delisted) Nathan Krueger (delisted) Oleg Markov (delisted) Nathan Murphy (retired) John Noble (Gold Coast Suns) Joe Richards (Port Adelaide)

ESSENDON

In:

Out: Kaine Baldwin (delisted) Jayden Davey (delisted) Dyson Heppell (retired) Nick Hind (delisted) Jaiden Hunter (delisted ®) Jake Kelly (retired) Jake Stringer (GWS Giants) Tex Wanganeen (delisted) Sam Weideman (delisted) 

FREMANTLE

In: Shai Bolton (Richmond)

Out: Josh Corbett (retired) Tom Emmett (delisted) Ethan Hughes (delisted) Max Knobel (delisted) Sebit Kuek (delisted) Ethan Stanley (delisted) Matt Taberner (delisted) Conrad Williams (delisted)

GEELONG

In: Bailey Smith (Western Bulldogs)

Out: Phoenix Foster (delisted) Joe Furphy (delisted) Mitch Hardie (delisted) Tom Hawkins (retired) Emerson Jeka (delisted) Oscar Murdoch (delisted) Brandan Parfitt (delisted) Gary Rohan (delisted) Zach Tuohy (retired) James Willis (delisted) 

GOLD COAST SUNS

In: Jack Graham (Richmond) Elliott Himmelberg (Adelaide) John Noble (Collingwood) Daniel Rioli (Richmond) 

Out: Rory Atkins (Port Adelaide) Sandy Brock (delisted) Levi Casboult (retired) Sam Day (delisted) Brandon Ellis (retired) Oskar Faulkhead (delisted ®) Jack Lukosius (Port Adelaide) Darcy Macpherson (delisted) Jack Mahony (delisted) Hewago Oea (delisted) Will Rowlands (delisted) James Tsitas (delisted)

GREATER WESTERN SYDNEY GIANTS

In: Jake Stringer (Essendon)

Out: Isaac Cumming (Adelaide)
Josh Fahey (delisted) Cooper Hamilton (delisted) Nick Haynes (Carlton) Lachlan Keeffe (delisted) Adam Kennedy (retired) James Peatling (Adelaide) Harry Perryman (Collingwood) Brayden Preuss (delisted) Jacob Wehr (delisted)

HAWTHORN 

In: Tom Barrass (West Coast Eagles) Josh Battle (St Kilda) Matt Hill (Category B®)

Out: Joshua Bennett (delisted ®) Denver Grainger-Barras (delisted) Jack Gunston (delisted) Jack O'Sullivan (delisted) Ethan Phillips (delisted) Cooper Stephens (delisted) Clay Tucker (delisted) Chad Wingard (retired)

MELBOURNE 

In: Tom Campbell (St Kilda) Harry Sharp (Brisbane) 

Out: Angus Brayshaw (retired) Ben Brown (retired) Kyah Farris-White (delisted ®) Lachie Hunter (retired) Alex Neal-Bullen (Adelaide) Josh Schache (retired) Joel Smith (delisted) Adam Tomlinson (delisted)

NORTH MELBOURNE 

In: Caleb Daniel (Western Bulldogs) Jack Darling (West Coast Eagles) Jacob Konstanty (Sydney Swans) Luke Parker (Sydney Swans)

Out: Blake Drury (delisted ®) Hamish Free (delisted) Hugh Greenwood (retired) Charlie Lazzaro (delisted) Bigoa Nyoun (delisted) Tyler Sellers (delisted) Liam Shiels (retired) Jaidyn Stephenson (retired) Curtis Taylor (delisted) Tarryn Thomas (delisted)

PORT ADELAIDE 

In: Rory Atkins (Gold Coast Suns) Jack Lukosius (Gold Coast Suns) Joe Richards (Collingwood)

Out: Tom Clurey (delisted) Charlie Dixon (retired) Francis Evans (delisted) Dan Houston (Collingwood) Tom McCallum (delisted) Trent McKenzie (retired) Kyle Marshall (delisted) Quinton Narkle (delisted) Tom Scully (delisted)

RICHMOND

In:

Out: Liam Baker (West Coast Eagles) Shai Bolton (Fremantle) Mate Colina (delisted ®) Matthew Coulthard (delisted) Noah Cumberland (delisted) Jack Graham (Gold Coast Suns) Dylan Grimes (retired) Dustin Martin (retired) Sam Naismith (retired) Marlion Pickett (retired) Daniel Rioli (Gold Coast Suns)

ST KILDA

In: Jack Macrae (Western Bulldogs)

Out: Matthew Allison (delisted) Josh Battle (Hawthorn) Riley Bonner (delisted) Tom Campbell (Melbourne) Brad Crouch (delisted) Jack Hayes (delisted) Olli Hotton (delisted) Tim Membrey (Collingwood) Ben Paton (delisted) Seb Ross (delisted) James Van Es (delisted)

SYDNEY SWANS

In:

Out: Harry Arnold (delisted) Aaron Francis (delisted) Joel Hamling (delisted) Lachlan McAndrew (delisted ®) Jacob Konstanty (North Melbourne) Jaiden Magor (delisted) Luke Parker (North Melbourne) Sam Reid (retired) Cooper Vickery (delisted)

WEST COAST EAGLES 

 In: Liam Baker (Richmond) Matt Owies (Carlton)

Out: Jordyn Baker (delisted) Tom Barrass (Hawthorn) Coby Burgiel (delisted) Jai Culley (delisted) Jack Darling (North Melbourne) Luke Edwards (retired) Andrew Gaff (retired) Jamaine Jones (delisted) Josh Rotham (delisted) Zane Trew (delisted) Alex Witherden (delisted)

WESTERN BULLDOGS

In: Matt Kennedy (Carlton)

Out: Dominic Bedendo (delisted) Charlie Clarke (delisted) Caleb Daniel (North Melbourne) Alex Keath (retired) Jack Macrae (St Kilda) Aiden O'Driscoll (retired) Kelsey Rypstra (delisted) Bailey Smith (Geelong)

[La Dee-vina Comedia 16,664]

Is this the earliest in a season that this equivalent thread has been started? If so, I guess it's a sign of the times.

[leave it to deever 17,506]

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

[Neil Crompton 5,426]

4 hours ago, leave it to deever said:

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

[leave it to deever 17,506]

7 minutes ago, Neil Crompton said:

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

Could whip up a good yarn about the father son rule demarcation lines etc. 

[Timothy Reddan-A'Blew 5,022]

12 minutes ago, Neil Crompton said:

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

[Guest]

34 minutes ago, Timothy Reddan-A'Blew said:

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

So, it’s a murder mystery then? If it’s not,  it will be should BBO be cast as the leading man.

#CastWisely

Reminds me of the time Pickett Fence told me he planned to write one of his very creative training reports and wanted to include me, Dazzle and BBO. I told him if either of them is my love interest, I’d track him down and they’d never find his body. He never mentioned it again. 😅

[leave it to deever 17,506]

1 hour ago, Timothy Reddan-A'Blew said:

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

Especially with his method acting.

Have I gone too far?

[monoccular 17,401]

We all know who caused the retirements of Murphy and Gus - was said #4💩 anywhere near Rory's eye perchance?

[Whispering_Jack 29,631]

Essendon rookie Jaiden Hunter returned home to WA today after the Bombers said he would not be offered a new contract. He becomes the first delisted player for the year.

[Demonstone 22,168]

Zach Tuohy has announced his retirement after a wonderful career.

I always admired the way he went about it and would have no hesitation in saying that he is the second best Irish recruit to ever play our game at the top level.

[whatwhat say what 22,531]

24 minutes ago, Demonstone said:

Zach Tuohy has announced his retirement after a wonderful career.

I always admired the way he went about it and would have no hesitation in saying that he is the second best Irish recruit to ever play our game at the top level.

i'll go tadgh kennelly at #2

[Demonstone 22,168]

Tadgh is a worthy candidate for the #2 spot, for sure.

Bonus points for his impromptu jig on the premiership podium.

[DeeZone 9,510]

Josh Schache and Kyah Farris- White just been delisted by the club.

[The Oracle 130]

3 hours ago, DeeZone said:

Josh Schache and Kyah Farris- White just been delisted by the club.

No doubt there are a few others who would be nervous about their positions on our list and those of a few others.

[Demonland 71,081]

https://x.com/1116sen/status/1831145610348761129

m/1116sen/status/1831145610348761129

[TRIGON 4,783]

On 30/04/2024 at 13:36, leave it to deever said:

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

[leave it to deever 17,506]

20 hours ago, TRIGON said:

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

That was very good.

 

[leave it to deever 17,506]

20 hours ago, TRIGON said:

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

I remember reading about the author of Goodfellas saying that he got a phone call from Scorcese telling him.." he'd be waiting ages for a book like this"

To which the writer replied"he'd be waiting forever for a phone call like this" 

[Kent 2,904]

Somebody please remind me why we let JJ go to sydney

[whatwhat say what 22,531]

6 minutes ago, Kent said:

Somebody please remind me why we let JJ go to sydney

to help drive content like this on demonland

[Kent 2,904]

21 minutes ago, whatwhat say what said:

to help drive content like this on demonland

Well that worked a treat

[Young Angus 768]

JJ was a good player would love to have kept him but oh well, our kids will be better than him soon I reckon

[TRIGON 4,783]

On 07/09/2024 at 10:35, leave it to deever said:

I remember reading about the author of Goodfellas saying that he got a phone call from Scorcese telling him.." he'd be waiting ages for a book like this"

To which the writer replied"he'd be waiting forever for a phone call like this" 

Best wishes @leave it to deever that your HATCH soon meets its MATCH.

[Demonland 71,081]