Rory Sloane’s retirement announcement coming on top of the medical retirements of Angus Brayshaw and Nathan Murphy bring us to this year’s HATCH MATCH & DESPATCH thread. 

There will be many more to come over the next six months or so - here’s this year’s version of the ins and outs at the AFL Clubs ~

ADELAIDE 

IN Chris Burgess (re-listed rookie), Isaac Cumming (free agent, GWS Giants), Sid Draper (South Adelaide, SA), Alex Neal-Bullen (trade, Melbourne), James Peatling (trade, GWS Giants), Harry Schoenberg (re-listed rookie), Tyler Welsh (W West Torrens, SA)
 
OUT Chris Burgess* (delisted), Lachlan Gollant (delisted), Will Hamill (delisted), Elliott Himmelberg (free agent, Gold Coast), Ned McHenry (delisted), Patrick Parnell (delisted), Harry Schoenberg* (delisted), Rory Sloane (retired)

BRISBANE 

IN Levi Ashcroft (Sandringham Dragons),  Darcy Craven (re-listed rookie), Ty Gallop (Maroochydore, Q), Darragh Joyce (re-listed rookie), Sam Marshall (Sandringham Dragons)

OUT Darcy Craven* (delisted), Joe Daniher (retired), Darragh Joyce* (delisted), Kalin Lane (delisted), Jarryd Lyons (retired), James Madden (delisted), Carter Michael (delisted), Jaxon Prior (delisted), Harry Sharp (trade, Melbourne)
 
CARLTON 

IN Ben Camporeale (Glenelg, SA), Lucas Camporeale (Glenelg, SA), Harry Charelson (GWV Rebels, rookie), Matt Duffy (Category B rookie), Nick Haynes (free agent, GWS Giants), Harry O’Farrell (Calder Cannons), Jagga Smith (Oakleigh Chargers)
 
OUT Domanic Akuei (delisted), Jack Caroll (delisted), Matt Carroll (delisted), David Cuningham (delisted), Sam Durdin (delisted), Matt Kennedy (trade, Western Bulldogs), Caleb Marchbank (delisted), Jack Martin (delisted), Alex Mirkov (delisted), Matt Owies (trade, West Coast)

COLLINGWOOD 
 
IN Joel Cochran (Sydney Swans Academy), Will Hayes (Claremont, WA), Dan Houston (trade, Port Adelaide), Ash Johnson (re-listed rookie), Oleg Markov (re-listed rookie), Tim Membrey (delisted free agent), Harry Perryman (free agent, GWS Giants), Charlie West (W West Torrens, SA)
 
OUT Aiden Begg (delisted), Jack Bytel (delisted), Josh Carmichael (retired), Josh Eyre (delisted), Ash Johnson* (delisted), Nathan Kreuger (delisted), Oleg Markov* (delisted), Nathan Murphy (retired), John Noble (trade, Gold Coast), Joe Richards (trade, Port Adelaide)
 
ESSENDON

IN Angus Clarke (Glenelg, SA), Archer Day-Wicks (Bendigo Pioneers, rookie), Kayle Gerreyn (West Perth, WA), Isaac Kako (Calder Cannons), Jayden Nguyen (Category B rookie), Rhys Unwin (GWV Rebels)

OUT Kaine Baldwin (delisted), Jayden Davey (delisted), Dyson Heppell (retired), Nick Hind (delisted), Jaiden Hunter (delisted), Jake Kelly (retired), Jake Stringer (trade, Greater Western Sydney), Tex Wanganeen (delisted), Sam Weideman (delisted)

FREMANTLE 
 
IN Shai Bolton (trade, Richmond), Jarren Carr (South Fremantle, WA), Charlie Nicholls (Central District, SA), Murphy Reid (Sandringham Dragons), Aiden Riddle (Claremont WA, rookie)
 
OUT Josh Corbett (retired), Tom Emmett (delisted), Ethan Hughes (delisted), Max Knobel* (delisted), Sebit Kuek (delisted), Ethan Stanley (delisted), Matt Taberner (delisted), Conrad Williams (delisted)
 
GEELONG 
 
IN Cillian Burke (Category B rookie), Lennox Hofmann (Sandringham Dragons), Xavier Ivisic (Geelong Falcons, rookie), Jack Martin (delisted free agent), Keighton Matofei-Forbes (Western Jets), Jacob Molier Sturt, SA), Joe Pike (Geelong Falcons, rookie), Jay Polkinghorne (Norwood, SA), Patrick Retschko (Oakleigh Chargers, rookie), Bailey Smith (trade, Western Bulldogs)
 
OUT Phoenix Foster (delisted), Joe Furphy (delisted), Mitch Hardie (delisted), Tom Hawkins (retired), Emerson Jeka (delisted), Oscar Murdoch (delisted), Brandan Parfitt (delisted), Gary Rohan (delisted), Zach Tuohy (retired), James Willis (delisted)

GOLD COAST SUNS
 
IN Cooper Bell (GWS Giants Academy), Sam Day (relisted), Asher Eastham (Gippsland Power, rookie), Zak Evans (Category B rookie), Lachlan Gulbin (Category B rookie), Elliott Himmelberg (free agent, Adelaide), Max Knobel (Fremantle, rookie), Leonardo Lombard (GCS Academy), John Noble (trade, Collingwood), Daniel Rioli (trade, Richmond)
 
OUT Rory Atkins (trade, Port Adelaide), Sandy Brock (delisted), Levi Casboult (retired), Sam Day (delisted), Brandon Ellis (retired), Oskar Faulkhead (delisted), Jack Lukosius (trade, Port Adelaide), Darcy Macpherson (delisted), Jack Mahony (delisted), Hewago Oea (delisted), Will Rowlands (delisted), James Tsitas (delisted)
 
GWS GIANTS 

IN Cody Angove (Claremont WA), Josh Fahey (re-listed rookie), Ollie Hannaford (GWV Rebels), Lachie Keeffe (re-listed rookie), Harry Oliver (Sandringham Dragons), Logan Smith GWS Giants Academy), Jake Stringer (trade, Essendon), Jacob Wehr (re-listed rookie)
 
OUT Isaac Cumming (free agent, Adelaide), Josaia Delana (Category B rookie), Josh Fahey* (delisted), Cooper Hamilton (delisted), Nick Haynes (free agent, Carlton), Lachie Keeffe* (delisted), Adam Kennedy (retired), James Peatling (trade, Adelaide), Harry Perryman (free agent, Collingwood), Braydon Preuss (delisted), Jacob Wehr* (delisted)
 
HAWTHORN 
 
IN Cody Anderson (Eastern Ranges), Josh Battle (free agent, St Kilda), Tom Barrass (trade, West Coast), Jack Gunston (relisted), Matt Hill (Category B rookie), Noah Mraz (Dandenong Stingrays), Jaime Uhr-Henry (Category B rookie)
 
OUT Josh Bennetts (delisted), Denver Grainger-Barras (delisted), Jack Gunston* (delisted), Cooper Stephens (delisted), Jack O'Sullivan (delisted), Ethan Phillips (delisted), Clay Tucker (delisted), Chad Wingard (retired)

MELBOURNE 
 
IN Tom Campbell (free agent, St Kilda), Aidan Johnson (Werribee), Harvey Langford (Dandenong Stingrays), Xavier Lindsay (Gippsland Power), Ricky Mentha (Category B rookie), Harry Sharp (trade, Brisbane)
 
OUT Angus Brayshaw (retired), Ben Brown (retired), Kyah Farris-White (delisted), Lachie Hunter (retired), Alex Neal-Bullen (trade, Adelaide), Josh Schache (delisted), Joel Smith (delisted), Adam Tomlinson (delisted)
 
NORTH MELBOURNE 

IN Caleb Daniel (trade, Western Bulldogs), Jack Darling (trade, West Coast), Jacob Konstanty (trade, Sydney), Finn O’Sullivan (Oakleigh Chargers), Luke Parker (trade, Sydney), Toby Pink (re-listed rookie), Luke Urquhart (East Fremantle, WA), River Stevens (Geelong Falcons), Matt Whitlock (Murray Bushrangers)
 
OUT Blake Drury (delisted), Hamish Free (delisted), Hugh Greenwood (retired), Charlie Lazzaro (delisted), Bigoa Nyuon (delisted), Toby Pink* (delisted), Tyler Sellers (delisted), Liam Shiels (retired), Jaidyn Stephenson (retired), Curtis Taylor (delisted), Tarryn Thomas (delisted)

PORT ADELAIDE

IN Rory Atkins (trade, Gold Coast), Benny Barrett (Category B rookie), Joe Berry (Murray Bushrangers), Tom Cochran (Central Districts, SA), Jack Lukosius (trade, Gold Coast), Christian Moraes (Eastern Ranges), Jacob Moss (Category B rookie), Joe Richards (trade, Collingwood), Jack Whitlock (Murray Bushrangers)
 
OUT Tom Clurey (delisted), Charlie Dixon (retired), Francis Evans (delisted), Dan Houston (trade, Collingwood), Kyle Marshall (delisted), Tom McCallum (delisted), Trent McKenzie (retired), Quinton Narkle (delisted), Tom Scully (delisted)
 
RICHMOND 

IN Harry Armstrong (Sandringham Dragons), Jonty Faull (GWV Rebels), Taj Hotton (Sandringham Dragons), Sam Lalor (GWV Rebels), Thomas Sims (Northern Knights), Josh Smillie (Eastern Ranges), Luke Trainor (Sandringham Dragons)

OUT Liam Baker (trade, West Coast), Shai Bolton (trade, Fremantle), Mate Colina* (delisted), Matthew Coulthard (delisted), Noah Cumberland (delisted), Jack Graham (free agent, West Coast), Dylan Grimes (retired), Dustin Martin (retired), Marlion Pickett (retired), Sam Naismith (retired), Daniel Rioli (trade, Gold Coast)

ST KILDA

IN Eamonn Armstrong (Category B rookie), James Barrat (Bendigo Pioneers), Hugh Boxshall (Claremont, WA), Brad Crouch (re-listed rookie), Alex Dodson (Sturt, SA), Jack Macrae (trade, Western Bulldogs), Alix Tauru (Gippsland Power), Tobie Travaglia (Bendigo Pioneers),
 
OUT Matthew Allison (delisted), Josh Battle (free agent, Hawthorn), Riley Bonner (delisted), Tom Campbell (free agent, Melbourne), Brad Crouch* (delisted), Brad Crouch (retired),Jack Hayes (delisted), Olli Hotton (delisted), Tim Membrey (delisted), Ben Paton (delisted), Seb Ross (delisted), James Van Es (delisted)
 
SYDNEY SWANS 
 
IN Riak Andrew (Dandenong Stingrays), Riley Bice (Werribee), Ned Bowman (Norwood, SA), Jesse Dattoli (Northern Knights), Aaron Francis (re-listed rookie), Joel Hamling (re-listed rookie), Blake Laidler (Oakleigh Chargers, rookie), Ben Paton (St Kilda, rookie)

OUT Harry Arnold (delisted), Aaron Francis* (delisted), Joel Hamling* (delisted), Jacob Konstanty (trade, North Melbourne), Jaiden Magor (delisted), Lachlan McAndrew (delisted), Luke Parker (trade, North Melbourne), Sam Reid (retired), Cooper Vickery (delisted)

WEST COAST EAGLES
 
IN Bo Allan (Peel Thunder WA), Liam Baker (trade, Richmond), Malakai Champion (Category B rookie), Hamish Davis (Claremont), Jack Graham (free agent, Richmond), Lucca Greggo (Western Jets), Tom Gross (Oakleigh Chargers), Matt Owies (trade, Carlton), Jobe Shanahan (Bendigo Pioneers)
 
OUT Jordyn Baker (delisted), Tom Barrass (trade, Hawthorn), Coby Burgiel (delisted), Jai Culley (delisted), Jack Darling (trade, North Melbourne), Luke Edwards (delisted), Andrew Gaff (retired), Jamaine Jones (delisted), Josh Rotham (delisted), Zane Trew (delisted), Alex Witherden (delisted)

WESTERN BULLDOGS 
 
IN Sam Davidson (Richmond VFL), Josh Dolan (Sandringham Dragons), Cooper Hynes (Dandenong Stingrays), Lachie Jaques (Geelong Falcons), Luke Kennedy (Sandringham Dragons), Matt Kennedy (trade, Carlton)

OUT Dominic Bedendo (delisted), Charlie Clarke (delisted), Caleb Daniel (trade, North Melbourne), Alex Keath (retired), Jack Macrae (trade, St Kilda), Aiden O'Driscoll (retired), Kelsey Rypstra (delisted), Bailey Smith (trade, Geelong)
 
 * = Club has committed to redrafting the player in the AFL and Rookie Drafts

Is this the earliest in a season that this equivalent thread has been started? If so, I guess it's a sign of the times.

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

  On 30/04/2024 at 03:36, leave it to deever said:

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

  On 30/04/2024 at 08:39, Neil Crompton said:

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

Could whip up a good yarn about the father son rule demarcation lines etc. 

  On 30/04/2024 at 08:39, Neil Crompton said:

Time to update the screenplay deevs. Instead of a GP, change that to a marquee footballer. Also, you’d have to have WCW in in there as a big support character, (comic relief?). Suddenly you have something that is going to resonate with a bigger audience I would have thought.

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

  On 30/04/2024 at 08:55, Timothy Reddan-A'Blew said:

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

So, it’s a murder mystery then? If it’s not,  it will be should BBO be cast as the leading man.

#CastWisely

Reminds me of the time Pickett Fence told me he planned to write one of his very creative training reports and wanted to include me, Dazzle and BBO. I told him if either of them is my love interest, I’d track him down and they’d never find his body. He never mentioned it again. 😅

  On 30/04/2024 at 08:55, Timothy Reddan-A'Blew said:

@WalkingCivilWar a walk-up start, naturally.

And o what tensions, of myriad forms, would be created with @Bitter but optimistic in the leading man role.

 

Especially with his method acting.

Have I gone too far?

We all know who caused the retirements of Murphy and Gus - was said #4💩 anywhere near Rory's eye perchance?

Essendon rookie Jaiden Hunter returned home to WA today after the Bombers said he would not be offered a new contract. He becomes the first delisted player for the year.

Zach Tuohy has announced his retirement after a wonderful career.

I always admired the way he went about it and would have no hesitation in saying that he is the second best Irish recruit to ever play our game at the top level.

  On 21/08/2024 at 04:43, Demonstone said:

Zach Tuohy has announced his retirement after a wonderful career.

I always admired the way he went about it and would have no hesitation in saying that he is the second best Irish recruit to ever play our game at the top level.

i'll go tadgh kennelly at #2

Tadgh is a worthy candidate for the #2 spot, for sure.

Bonus points for his impromptu jig on the premiership podium.

Josh Schache and Kyah Farris- White just been delisted by the club.

  On 27/08/2024 at 01:06, DeeZone said:

Josh Schache and Kyah Farris- White just been delisted by the club.

No doubt there are a few others who would be nervous about their positions on our list and those of a few others.

https://x.com/1116sen/status/1831145610348761129

m/1116sen/status/1831145610348761129

  On 30/04/2024 at 03:36, leave it to deever said:

I once wrote a screenplay with the same name as this thread.

A lovely little story about a quaint Victorian trout fishing town whose Mayor tries to lure a GP to it with his daughter as the bait.

Over 20 years later still waiting for that big phone call.

Won't be long now 😭 

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

  On 06/09/2024 at 04:15, TRIGON said:

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

That was very good.

 

  On 06/09/2024 at 04:15, TRIGON said:

Hmmm, it's only getting tougher. She'll be in her 40s by now.

I remember reading about the author of Goodfellas saying that he got a phone call from Scorcese telling him.." he'd be waiting ages for a book like this"

To which the writer replied"he'd be waiting forever for a phone call like this" 

Somebody please remind me why we let JJ go to sydney

  On 07/09/2024 at 05:28, Kent said:

Somebody please remind me why we let JJ go to sydney

to help drive content like this on demonland

  On 07/09/2024 at 05:35, whatwhat say what said:

to help drive content like this on demonland

Well that worked a treat

JJ was a good player would love to have kept him but oh well, our kids will be better than him soon I reckon

  On 07/09/2024 at 00:35, leave it to deever said:

I remember reading about the author of Goodfellas saying that he got a phone call from Scorcese telling him.." he'd be waiting ages for a book like this"

To which the writer replied"he'd be waiting forever for a phone call like this" 

Best wishes @leave it to deever that your HATCH soon meets its MATCH.