Jump to content

David Schwarz-isms


titan_uranus

Recommended Posts

Posted

He's the AFL's equivalent of George W. Bush. On yesterday's coverage he said: 'That's one thing about Andrew Welsh. You just can't question his courageousness'

Last week he said: 'He's just a former shadow of himself' (as opposed to a shadow of his former self)

I remember seeing someone's signature here which has Schwarz saying 'On what?' in regards to writing his autobiography.

Any more to add to the collection?

Posted
I remember seeing someone's signature here which has Schwarz saying 'On what?' in regards to writing his autobiography?

He might have been suggesting that his life isn't worthy of a book.

No excuse for the others, though :P

Posted

This probably isn't quite what you are looking for, but he tipped West Coast to beat Geelong last thursday night saying that WCE would apply good pressure to Geelong.

I don't think I've seen a team apply less pressure in an AFL match in my life.

Posted
He's the AFL's equivalent of George W. Bush. On yesterday's coverage he said: 'That's one thing about Andrew Welsh. You just can't question his courageousness'

In Ox's defence courageousness is a proper word describing the quality of being courageous. However I agree, 'you just can't question his courage' would have been better.

Posted

At Geelong vs Brisbane match, he said one of the stands at Skilled Stadium was 'the worst stand ever designed for spectators' (well who else would it be designed for?)

Posted
At Geelong vs Brisbane match, he said one of the stands at Skilled Stadium was 'the worst stand ever designed for spectators' (well who else would it be designed for?)

Now you're getting petty.

Posted

2 minutes in the Ess v Carl game, he said "Carlton have not touched it yet, have not got near it, not even laid a tackle", just after we watch Mcphee getting up from a high tackle.

he must have photos of someone at ch7. he is completely sh1thouse.

Posted
the man is a dead set legend, give him a break.

he is a good commentator to listen too aswell, in comparison to some of the shockers getting airtime these days

David Schwartz is the worst commentator I have ever heard in my life.

GL

Posted

once he was reading out an SMS

"You should bring in the US A boys more often onto your show. What's US A boys, Franka?"

*5 seconds later*

"Ohh USA"

Posted
Try talking into a microphone for hours on end and not saying something stupid. You people are pathetic

The unfortunate point is that he rarely says anything insightful or even interesting to make up for it. He is hands down the most pants special comments man going around right now, and there are some bad ones. Compare him to Nathan Buckley, Jason Dunstall or Garry Lyon. All brilliant special comments men who genuinely give you an innovative take on the game at times.

Just because he was a gun footy player doesn't mean you have to like him as a commentator. Its just not his strong suit.

Posted

Buckley, Dunstan and Lyon have a tad too much of the smugs for my liking. The Ox is down to earth and I have enjoyed his rise and rise post football. I like a lot of the individuals and teams on SEN and The Ox ranks high on my list because I admire him. There have always been a mixture of flavours in the footy press. I go back to Charlton, Dyer, Richards, Bietzal (spelling?), Davis, Casey, Williamson and a few of the ABC boys whose names escape me. There have always been clowns (Richards) and less educated formers (Dyer). I prefer to listen to ex-players, and I particularly enjoy listening to ex-MFC players because we haven't had many over the distance. The Ox stocks are on the rise... good luck to him... You can always listen to Rex if you can't stomach my boy!

Posted

Michael Christian on Saturday

"The Hawks look more dangerous when they're playing well"

Um....Errr...

Posted

Yeah... He's no Robert Walls with the annoyingly bad calls, but he does say some silly things...

But I can't hate him. He defends us at every opportunity, despite not having much to get excited about at MFC. And most of all he's worked out the magic formula to being a successful media personality/ex footballer: It's a game, and there is almost no aspect of footy that you CAN'T approach with a sense of humour. Newman and Kekovich have made a pretty penny by realising this fact...

Posted
2 minutes in the Ess v Carl game, he said "Carlton have not touched it yet, have not got near it, not even laid a tackle", just after we watch Mcphee getting up from a high tackle.

he must have photos of someone at ch7. he is completely sh1thouse.

he was probably right. the stat sheets dont count every time a player trys to tackle another player, they only count effective tackles that force the player to dispose of the ball or lose possession. if it was a high tackle it wouldnt have counted as one of those.

Posted
Try talking into a microphone for hours on end and not saying something stupid. You people are pathetic

Try talking into a microphone for hours on end and not saying something intelligent. It's tough, but Schwarter is the man for the job.

His 'umms' and 'ahhs' are the fitting accompaniment to the worst television broadcasting license ever whored.

Posted

I would listen to 10 Schwarz's before I would listen to 1 Malcom Blight.

He is better on radio than TV though for some reason. He clowns it up on radio and is quite funny sometimes. I guess you can't get away with that on TV...

Posted

I reckon that every commentator on the planet says stupid stuff that's much worse than that.

How many times do you hear something like "he likes to kick a goal" or "they'll want to win today"?

Posted

"he was probably right. the stat sheets dont count every time a player trys to tackle another player, they only count effective tackles that force the player to dispose of the ball or lose possession. if it was a high tackle it wouldnt have counted as one of those. "

thats a long bow to draw. I think he just f$cked up.

let's face it, he is not the smartest cookie in the packet and is lucky to be broadcasting. McAvaney must just ignore him in his own mind when he goes to work.

Posted
let's face it, he is not the smartest cookie in the packet and is lucky to be broadcasting. McAvaney must just ignore him in his own mind when he goes to work.

Your kidding me right ;) McAvaney only has two stock words...cleeevvvveeer, speeeecialll.

Certified card carrying F*&^wit.

Oh, did I mention I don't like Bruce McAvaney's commentary style. :angry:

Posted
Your kidding me right ;) McAvaney only has two stock words...cleeevvvveeer, speeeecialll.

Certified card carrying F*&^wit.

Oh, did I mention I don't like Bruce McAvaney's commentary style. :angry:

McAvaney: "....he can play the boy.." this comment makes me cringe, I need to go to the fridge for a beer every time he says this! :angry:

Posted
McAvaney: "....he can play the boy.." this comment makes me cringe, I need to go to the fridge for a beer every time he says this! :angry:

equal best caller in the business with Commetti, as he does not always say the obvious and actually talks tactics and football during a game. Schwartz next to him however, sounds like a punch drunk wannabe commentator who keeps saying "If he thinks he can. blah blah...then he needs to have good hard look at himself", or the most overused phrase by footballers commentating - "Thats an absolute disgrace".

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Demonland Forums  

  • Match Previews, Reports & Articles  

    THE ACCIDENTAL DEMONS by The Oracle

    In the space of eight days, the Melbourne Football Club’s plans for the coming year were turned upside down by two season-ending injuries to players who were contending strongly for places in its opening round match against the GWS Giants. Shane McAdam was first player to go down with injury when he ruptured an Achilles tendon at Friday afternoon training, a week before the cut-off date for the AFL’s pre-season supplemental selection period (“SSP”). McAdam was beginning to get some real mom

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Special Features

    PREGAME: Practice Match vs Fremantle

    The Demons hit the road for what will be their first of 8 interstate trips this year when they play their final practice match before the 2025 AFL Premiership Season against the Fremantle Dockers in Perth on Sunday, 2nd March @ 6:10pm (AEDT). 2025 AAMI Community Series Sun Mar 2 Fremantle v Melbourne, Rushton Oval, Mandurah, 3.10pm AWST (6.10pm AEDT)

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 95

    RETURN TO NORMAL by Whispering Jack

    One of my prized possessions is a framed, autographed guernsey bearing the number 31 worn by my childhood hero, Melbourne’s champion six time premiership player Ronald Dale Barassi who passed away on 16 September 2023, aged 87. The former captain who went on to a successful coaching career, mainly with other clubs, came back to the fold in his later years as a staunch Demon supporter who often sat across the way from me in the Northern Stand of the MCG cheering on the team. Barassi died the

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Match Reports

    PODCAST: Match SIM vs North Melbourne

    Join us LIVE on Monday night at 8:30pm—note that this special time is just for this week due to prior commitments. We'll break down the Match SIM against North Melbourne and wrap up the preseason with insights into training and our latest recruits. I apologize for skipping our annual season review show at the end of last season. After a disapponting season filled with off-field antics and a heated trade week, I needed a break. Thankfully, the offseason has recharged me, and I’m back—ready t

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 42

    GAMEDAY: Match SIM vs North Melbourne

    After an agonizingly long off-season the 2025 AFL Premiership Season is almost upon us and the Demons have their first practice hit out against the Kangaroos in a match simulation out at Arden Street. The Demons will take on the Kangaroos in match simulation play, starting from 10am AEDT and broadcast live on Foxtel and Kayo. The play start time was brought forward from the initial 11am bounce, due to the high temperatures forecast.  The match sim will consist of four 25-minute qu

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Melbourne Demons 465

    TRAINING: Friday 21st February 2025

    Demonland Trackwatchers beat the Friday heat to bring you their observations from this morning's Captain's Run out at Gosch's Paddock in the lead up to their first hit out in a Practice Match tomorrow against the Kangaroos. TRAVY14'S PRESEASON TRAINING OBSERVATIONS On the park: Trac Spargo Gawn Viney Langdon May Fritsch Salem Henderson Rehab: McVee (updated to include Melk, Kolt, AMW and Kentfield) Spoke to "Gus" the trainer, he said these are the guys no

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports

    TRAINING: Wednesday 19th February 2025

    Demonlander The Analyser was the sole Trackwatcher out at Casey Fields today to bring you the following observations from this mornings preseason training session. Training  was at Casey today. It consisted of a match simulation for one half  and then a free choice activity time. Activities included kicking for goal,  aerial , contest work etc. I noticed the following players not in match simulation Jack Viney  running laps and looks fine for round one . I think Kolt looks like he’s im

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports 1

    TRAINING: Monday 17th February 2025

    Demonland Trackwatchers were on hand at Monday morning's preseason training at Gosch's Paddock to bring you their brief observations of the session. HARVEY WALLBANGER'S PRESEASON TRAINING OBSERVATIONS Gentle flush session at Gosch's this morning. Absent: May, Pickett (All Stars) McVee, McAdam. Rehabbing: Great to see Kentfield back (much slimmer), walking with Tholstrup, TMac (suspect just a management thing), Viney (still being cautious with that rib cartilage?), Melksham (

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports

    MATCH SIM: Friday 14th February 2025

    A couple of Demonland Trackwatchers made their way out to Casey Field's for the Melbourne Football Club's Family Series day to bring you their observations on the Match Simulation. HARVEY WALLBANGER'S MATCH SIMULATION OBSERVATIONS Absent: May, Pickett (All Stars), McVee, Windor, Kentfield, Mentha Present but not playing: Petracca, Viney, Spargo, Tholstrup, Melksham Starting Blue 18 (+ just 2 interchange): B: Petty, TMac, Lever, Howes, Bowey Salem M: Gawn, Oliver, La

    Demonland
    Demonland |
    Training Reports
  • Tell a friend

    Love Demonland? Tell a friend!
×
×
  • Create New...