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Demonstone's and Flaubert's English Grammar for Demonlanders 101

Neil Crompton
Neil Crompton
in Melbourne Demons

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9 hours ago, Demons1858 said:

This topic wouldn't start on any other clubs fan forum ... not sure if that a good or bad

The closest thread I could find on the Collingwood fan forum was one which discussed the benefits of false teeth. On the Richmond one, they have a thread on the attributes of various knives. There's an old thread on the Geelong site which refers to handbags, but it's been superseded by one about aged care facilities.

Edited by La Dee-vina Comedia
typo

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    • Haha 8
    9 hours ago, Demons1858 said:

    This topic wouldn't start on any other clubs fan forum ... not sure if that a good or bad

    "Demonland - for the thinking footy fan!"

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    • Like 3
     
    16 minutes ago, Winners at last said:

    Past tense of bring = brang!!

    😁

    I worked with a woman who always said "everythink". Drove me crazy.

    Where did youse go to school, Winners, or did youse?  Surely the past tense of brought is brung, not brang!  😱

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    • Haha 1

    • Author
    25 minutes ago, Winners at last said:

    Past tense of bring = brang!!

    😁

    I worked with a woman who always said "everythink". Drove me crazy.

    Sing, sang, sung

    spring sprang sprung

    bring, brang, brung?

    why bring, brought?

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    1 hour ago, Winners at last said:

    Past tense of bring = brang!!

    😁

    I worked with a woman who always said "everythink". Drove me crazy.

    I work with a woman right now who does this. This same person says 'anaway' instead of anyway. She's not stupid either which is disappointing. 

     

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    43 minutes ago, Neil Crompton said:

    Sing, sang, sung

    spring sprang sprung

    bring, brang, brung?

    why bring, brought?

    What's the Demonland consensus view on the past tense of the verb dive as in "Clayton Oliver dived into the pack" or "Clayton Oliver dove into the pack"?. I prefer "dived" but I'm just biased against the use of American English.

    Note: Not to be confused with the noun, as in "Matthew Lloyd took a dive".

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    • Like 1
     

    Here’s one many on here will know, but just as many might not know:

    Affect - verb

    Effect - noun

    Effect - also a verb

     

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    Using numerals in sentences is wrong.  You should use the word.  For example;

    Clayton Oliver had 30 possessions.         WRONG

    Clayton Oliver had thirty possessions.    CORRECT

    If the number is 100 or greater then you can use the numeral but you can't start a sentence with a numeral no matter what the number is.  It's a common error everyone makes on Demonland.  They even make that mistake on the news. 

     

    Edited by one_demon

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    9 minutes ago, one_demon said:

    Using numerals in sentences is wrong.  You should use the word.  For example;

    Clayton Oliver had 30 possessions.         WRONG

    Clayton Oliver had thirty possessions.    CORRECT

    If the number is 100 or greater then you can use the numeral but you can't start a sentence with a numeral no matter what the number is.  It's a common error everyone makes even on the news. 

     

    It’s actually numbers from 10 upwards that are to be expressed in numerals. So Clayton Oliver had 30 possessions is correct.

    Although it’s highly likely he racked up more. But that’s beside the point. 😁

    Edited by WalkingCivilWar

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    I know somebody who pronounces "trough" as "tro" because that's what her mother did.

    Must ask her if her mum voted for Go Whitlam.

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    25 minutes ago, one_demon said:

    Using numerals in sentences is wrong.  You should use the word.  For example;

    Clayton Oliver had 30 possessions.         WRONG

    Clayton Oliver had thirty possessions.    CORRECT

    If the number is 100 or greater then you can use the numeral but you can't start a sentence with a numeral no matter what the number is.  It's a common error everyone makes on Demonland.  They even make that mistake on the news. 

     

    I personally reckon it's wrong to be typing words on a screen on Demonland. It's lazy and pedestrian.

    I think everyone should be handwriting in cursive on paper, then scanning it and posting the image of said cursive for every single post they make. 

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    • Haha 2
    36 minutes ago, La Dee-vina Comedia said:

    What's the Demonland consensus view on the past tense of the verb dive

    I always go with "dived".

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    • Like 1
    38 minutes ago, La Dee-vina Comedia said:

    What's the Demonland consensus view on the past tense of the verb dive as in "Clayton Oliver dived into the pack" or "Clayton Oliver dove into the pack"?. I prefer "dived" but I'm just biased against the use of American English.

    Note: Not to be confused with the noun, as in "Matthew Lloyd took a dive".

    I would say dived. Don't know where dove came from, usually it's the Americans who are lazy with this stuff. 

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    Not grammar, but I suspect those paying attention to this thread might be intrigued by this language quirk noted in 'Elements of Eloquence' by Mark Forsyth. IMG_20201223_161622_768.jpg.f3d3ac82413883760e07b61b5149d286.jpg

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    • Love 5
    1 hour ago, Neil Crompton said:

    Sing, sang, sung

    spring sprang sprung

    bring, brang, brung?

    why bring, brought?

    That’s just one example of what makes the English language so hard to learn. But it’s not the only language that’s hard to learn…

    I lived in Warsaw for eight months in 2020 (cheers, Covid!) and during a period of vey harsh lockdown, to avoid early onset dementia, I taught myself the NATO phonetic alphabet, Semaphore, Morse Code and the sign language alphabet. 

    Ppl asked me why I didn’t use the time to learn the Polish language. 


    I said because…

    D68DD781-347A-40B7-AC74-4D5DC9784678.thumb.jpeg.dd3cb10d6977c2a1c4b8857276a71625.jpeg

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    1 hour ago, monoccular said:

    Where did youse go to school, Winners, or did youse?  Surely the past tense of brought is brung, not brang!  😱

    The "everythink' woman also said (and presumably still says) "youse" and was (and presumably remains) a frequent "double negative" user. 

     

    Edited by Winners at last

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    47 minutes ago, one_demon said:

    Using numerals in sentences is wrong.  You should use the word.  For example;

    Clayton Oliver had 30 possessions.         WRONG

    Clayton Oliver had thirty possessions.    CORRECT

    If the number is 100 or greater then you can use the numeral but you can't start a sentence with a numeral no matter what the number is.  It's a common error everyone makes on Demonland.  They even make that mistake on the news. 

     

    I always turn to the Australian Government Style Manual for clarification on matters of writing.

    In regard to numerals it just says "there can be no absolute rules to cover every possible contingency. In the absence of specific instructions, the decision whether to use figures or words in particular instances must be made by the editor ...". So nothing is "right" or "wrong". It does recommend words for numbers less than 10.

    Generally numerals are used in scientific, technical or mathematical work, and words are used in prose, descriptive or narrative work. But this isn't exclusive (see editor's choice above). I agree that numerals should never be used to start a sentence.

    Also, on a totally separate issue, the correct written term is per cent, not percent.
     

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    • Like 1

    1 minute ago, mauriesy said:

    I always turn to the Australian Government Style Manual for clarification on matters of writing.

    In regard to numerals it just says "there can be no absolute rules to cover every possible contingency. In the absence of specific instructions, the decision whether to use figures or words in particular instances must be made by the editor ...". So nothing is "right" or "wrong". It does recommend words for numbers less than 10.

    Generally numerals are used in scientific, technical or mathematical work, and words are used in prose, descriptive or narrative work. But this isn't exclusive (see editor's choice above). I agree that numerals should never be used to start a sentence.

    Also, on a totally separate issue, the correct written term is per cent, not percent.
     

    Does it say words for numbers "less than 10" or "lower than 10" or "fewer than 10" (or "less than ten" or "lower than ten" or "fewer than ten")?🙂

     

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    • Haha 3
    On 7/23/2022 at 6:31 PM, old55 said:

    At present these gems are spread out over hundreds of separate topics and that makes them too hard to reference in our time of need. 

    More succinctly as:

     

    Presently, these gems are spread out over hundreds of separate topics, making them too hard to reference in our time of need.

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    • Haha 1
    1 hour ago, WalkingCivilWar said:

    It’s actually numbers from 10 upwards that are to be expressed in numerals.

    You may be correct.  Some rules say it's ten others say it's 100. At school I was taught to always use the words not the numeral.  Numerals just look wrong. 

    Edited by one_demon

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    •  
    34 minutes ago, Demonstone said:

    That's not unheard of.

    She constantly used double negatives which gave her comments the opposite meaning to what was intended. 

    Double negatives are used in many songs ... "I ain't got no satisfaction". Which means the singer (Sir Mick) has indeed attained some degree of satisfaction. Should be "I don't have any satisfaction".

    Another example is Kiki Dee's (lol ... Dee) song I've got the Music in Me which starts "Ain't got no trouble in my life". Which literally means that she (unhappily) had trouble in her life because her status was not of a person with no trouble in her life. The following lyrics suggest that the opposite meaning was intended.

    I also hate "I seen the Demons play on Friday night". FFS. 

    I'm just warming up.

    Edited by Winners at last

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    • Like 1
    13 minutes ago, Winners at last said:

    Double negatives are used in many songs ... "I ain't got no satisfaction". Which means the singer (Sir Mick) has indeed attained some degree of satisfaction. Should be "I don't have any satisfaction".

    The line is "I can't get no satisfaction" but your point stands.

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