Jump to content

Commentary "gems"

Featured Replies

Kudos to you, WYL. Wish I could have had the same opportunity!

How did he handle the criticism?

He didn't say anything. But he heard it alright!!

He is shorter than me i couldn't believe it....

Classic little man syndrome.

 

He didn't say anything. But he heard it alright!!

He is shorter than me i couldn't believe it....

Classic little man syndrome.

A little man with an enormous bonce

 

A little man with an enormous bonce

You are not wrong there.

Haven't seen him since. Such a shame. He has ruined so many games!!

  • 2 weeks later...

Today's commentary is usuaully full of matey, useless drivel.

Just like the cricket for about the last 20 years - since McGilvray retired

 

Basil Zempilas needs to be pulled aside and told to stop sticking the boots into under-performing teams and to pull his head in. He did it last year with us and now he has been requesting songs that sum up Carlton's fate. All very easy to mock other teams when you achieved nothing spectacular as a footballer yourself (and yes I know Zempilas played in the WAFL).

  • Author

Pretty sure it was him in the first quarter who said "this could be the quarter that kick starts Carlton's year."

Whoops.


I don't mind criticism and even what you said isn't unforgiveable. At least it was positive towards Carlton's chances. It's dopey crap like asking for song requests or carrying on like a tossah by repeating that the Dees are the Washington Generals ad nauseum (like he did last year when we got touched up by the Crows) which annoys me.

Just caught it on the news, not sure who the commentator was, but says about Ablett kicking a goal: "He only needs a little snifter".

Do they encourage drinking during the game at GCS?

During Saturday night's Gold Coast V Hawthorn game, Brian Taylor referred to Gary Ablett as "The Lingy Sipping Latte Man"

It was a dry and completely unfunny reference to some flack they'd been giving Cameron Ling for catching up with Ablett for a coffee during the week.

My television was promptly muted. Wish I'd found that button sooner.

I can't stand Dwayne Russell. Turn the volume off if he is commentating. Saw him and Gerard at the airport this morning. I seriously wanted to tell him how much I dislike the rubbish that comes out of his mouth.

I wrote to 3aw about 4 times complaining about Der Wayne. Got generic responses. In the end I haven't listened to their show for 5yrs. If he is commentating, I turn it off.

Disgraceful, condescending, snide, arrogant tossbag.

I heard Jack Dyer once say "he kicked it laterally across the ground at right angles".

You too can commentate like Bruce McAveney:

  • make "question-statements", like "He's a good player isn't he?" or "That was a great kick, wasn't it?", or "He's going to be something, isn't he?"
  • reserve a few special words like "special", "terrific", "caress" or "ooooooooh!" for players like Buddy, Cyril or Stevie J.
  • know the nicknames for the best players so you sound matey with them.
  • have lots of obtuse stats at your fingertips.
  • otherwise just link the play with "ta", like "Viney ta Cross ta Jones ta Dawes"

McAveney has this incredibly annoying habit of saying something like:

"He picks it up and kicks it beautifully"

Only to see the ball land right on the chest of an opponent. He does it several times a game.

Cometti is the best. Sylvia's smother, Koutafidies, more syllables than goals this evening. Accurate and funny. Ian Robertson was an idiot as is Brian Taylor. The ABC A team is the cream.

I'm pleased to say that in another thread chookfowler has correctly said "comparisons are odious".

Which reminds me of Andy Maher continually saying "comparisons are onerous".

And Rohan Connolly on the weekend said, "The proof is in the pudding". Never mind that the correct expression is "The proof of the pudding is in the eating".

It just seems that commentators (mainly Channel Seven) are talking about players in general terms as opposed to calling what is actually happening in the game now and analysing that game.

It annoys me to no end becuase I don't need Luke Darcy to tell me how he likes the way Nathan Jones goes about it, I want to find something out that I otherwise wouldn't know about the game unless I was there.

I think it was Hamo on Saturday who said "Melbourne look like the winners" in the THIRD quarter, then told off his co-commentator for "an early crow" when something similar was said midway through the last quarter.


The funny thing about TV football commentary is that 90% of it is pointless.

The last thing I need is a moron telling me what I am looking at.

Ritchie Benaud is a great commentator.

"My mantra is: put your brain into gear and if you can add to what's on the screen then do it, otherwise shut up" Ritchie Benaud

If only football commentators could do that.

The funny thing about TV football commentary is that 90% of it is pointless.

The last thing I need is a moron telling me what I am looking at.

Ritchie Benaud is a great commentator.

"My mantra is: put your brain into gear and if you can add to what's on the screen then do it, otherwise shut up" Ritchie Benaud

If only football commentators could do that.

The difference is for the most part they can see the whole ground, that's what you lose from watching on TV and so much happens off the ball that they could be telling us about.

The funny thing about TV football commentary is that 90% of it is pointless.

The last thing I need is a moron telling me what I am looking at.

Ritchie Benaud is a great commentator.

"My mantra is: put your brain into gear and if you can add to what's on the screen then do it, otherwise shut up" Ritchie Benaud

If only football commentators could do that.

You'd think so, but in the year when the ABC were the sole rights holder (in the mid 1980s?) they tried the then BBC soccer calling style where it was of the form "Cross..(delay)...to Tyson...(delay)...to Dawes" with little else. The viewers complained and asked for the more traditional commentary style which Channel 7 provides today.

 

i have a feeling the next goal will make a statement here,dont you dennis.

north have scored 4/3 from 9 inside 50s thats a lot isnt it richo,yes brian its 7 shots from 9 entries, a lot.

JB,Hammer,CHoo man,Darce -it's not a matey boys club you've formed but an ineloquent yell fest.

Brayshaw is one who should travel by light plane more often-hopefully during storms.

Perth twerp.


Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Featured Content

  • PREVIEW: North Melbourne

    Can you believe it? After a long period of years over which Melbourne has dominated in matches against North Melbourne, the Demons are looking down the barrel at two defeats at the hands of the Kangaroos in the same season. And if that eventuates, it will come hot on the heels of an identical result against the Gold Coast Suns. How have the might fallen? There is a slight difference in that North Melbourne are not yet in the same place as Gold Coast. Like Melbourne, they are currently situated in the lower half of the ladder and though they did achieve a significant upset when the teams met earlier in the season, their subsequent form has been equally unimpressive and inconsistent. 

      • Thanks
    • 1 reply
  • REPORT: Adelaide

    The atmosphere at the Melbourne Football Club at the beginning of the season was aspirational following an injury-plagued year in 2024. Coach Simon Goodwin had lofty expectations with the return of key players, the anticipated improvement from a maturing group with a few years of experience under their belts, and some exceptional young talent also joining the ranks. All of that went by the wayside as the team failed to click into action early on. It rallied briefly with a new strategy but has fallen again with five more  consecutive defeats. 

      • Clap
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 0 replies
  • CASEY: Coburg

    The Casey Demons returned to their home ground which was once a graveyard for opposing teams but they managed to gift the four points on offer to Coburg with yet another of their trademark displays of inaccuracy in front of goals and some undisciplined football that earned the displeasure of the umpires late in the game. The home team was welcomed by a small crowd at Casey Fields and looked right at home as it dominated the first three quarters and led for all bar the last five minutes of the game. In the end, they came away with nothing, despite winning everywhere but on the scoreboard and the free kick count.

      • Thanks
    • 0 replies
  • PREGAME: Rd 18 vs North Melbourne

    After four weeks on the road the Demons make their long awaited return to the MCG next Sunday to play in a classic late season dead rubber against the North Melbourne Kangaroos. Who comes in and who comes out?

      • Thanks
    • 269 replies
  • POSTGAME: Rd 17 vs Adelaide

    The Demons were wasteful early before putting the foot down early in the 2nd quarter but they chased tail for the remainder of the match. They could not get their first use of the footy after half time and when they did poor skills, execution and decision making let them down.

      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 246 replies
  • PODCAST: Rd 17 vs Adelaide

    The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on Monday, 7th July @ 8:00pm. Join Binman & I as we dissect the Dees disappointing loss to the Crows.
    Your questions and comments are a huge part of our podcast so please post anything you want to ask or say below and we'll give you a shout out on the show.
    Listen LIVE: https://demonland.com/

      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 28 replies