Jump to content

Featured Replies

10 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Now to other matters.

In The Age this morning both Dimian Hardwicke and Nathan Fuckley were quoted as expecting their teams to make the eight in 2017!

Make of that what you will.

Serious news. I know I have said it before but I believe Biffen has finally OD'd ( nothing to do with you OD). He currently doesn't owe me money yet I cannot contact him.

Further news. It is possible that Uncle Bitter will going to the footy with young children next Saturday . (Take a breath Ernie)

Final big news. The squeeze has, for the moment, ( I think) given me the arse. So I shall be bunking with the lads.

Fear not Bitter One.

I am fully cognisant and alert.

My sympathy goes out to the lads .

I hope you can match their levels of hygiene .

They must be disappointed more than anyone at your matrimonial difficulties.

 
17 minutes ago, Biffen said:

Fear not Bitter One.

I am fully cognisant and alert.

My sympathy goes out to the lads .

I hope you can match their levels of hygiene .

They must be disappointed more than anyone at your matrimonial difficulties.

Well Biffen your continued existence is a matter of some mystery ... I doubt it can go on much longer.

As to "The lads" . Yes their lifestyle is mostly laudable but to assert (as you boldly do) that their habits are overall, in some way more hygienic than mine is generally  unsupportable. I mean to say, it is only on rare occasions of overindulgence , that I "snap one off" in my own stall!

 

Edited by Bitter but optimistic

53 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Final big news. The squeeze has, for the moment, ( I think) given me the arse. So I shall be bonking with the lads.

Edited for accuracy.

Your missus would probably describe it as 'good news' rather than 'big news'. With your dementia it's possible you may not find your way back.

 

This is an odd time on Demonland. The possibility of making the finals (remote in my view) seems to be hanging over the site - something like the sword of Damocles. Even I feel afflicted by some sort of malaise that makes me feel as though I am walking through honey.A number of the regular posters on this thread have gone quiet - same malaise I suspect.

There appears to both a horror and anticipation of what might happen over the next two weeks. No one really wants to commit because we have been let down so many times.

To more trivial matters. Biffen is apparently alive. Surprising but no doubt temporary. And who GAF anyway.

Another positive is that "The Lads" are being quite generous in sharing their accommodation with me - although they insist on choosing the tv programs. I'm still a bit short on cash but the wine cellar is well stocked so Ill survive. 

[censored] me, the quicker we are through the next two weeks the better!

28 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

This is an odd time on Demonland. The possibility of making the finals (remote in my view) seems to be hanging over the site - something like the sword of Damocles. Even I feel afflicted by some sort of malaise that makes me feel as though I am walking through honey.A number of the regular posters on this thread have gone quiet - same malaise I suspect.

There appears to both a horror and anticipation of what might happen over the next two weeks. No one really wants to commit because we have been let down so many times.

To more trivial matters. Biffen is apparently alive. Surprising but no doubt temporary. And who GAF anyway.

Another positive is that "The Lads" are being quite generous in sharing their accommodation with me - although they insist on choosing the tv programs. I'm still a bit short on cash but the wine cellar is well stocked so Ill survive. 

[censored] me, the quicker we are through the next two weeks the better!

Bitters, no offence intended but have you ever seen the movie Leon The Pig Farmer. I love your posts but you remind me so much of this movie.


24 minutes ago, Left Foot Snap said:

Bitters, no offence intended but have you ever seen the movie Leon The Pig Farmer. I love your posts but you remind me so much of this movie.

Post of the year, without question.

It is an odd time alright. When we were crap, we were all full of [censored], and made this thread quite lively. Now, when there is a chance of us playing finals with two rounds to go, we are all gobsmacked and wondering whether this is a dream or not, and not saying much in case we wake up!

20 hours ago, Left Foot Snap said:

Bitters, no offence intended but have you ever seen the movie Leon The Pig Farmer. I love your posts but you remind me so much of this movie.

Offence taken!

Pig Farmer! Pig Farmer!

Go and give yourself a merciless flogging you scoundrel!

 
  • Author

Apparently a banana shortage. Leon, forget the pigs, grow bananas.

16 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Offence taken!

Pig Farmer! Pig Farmer!

Go and give yourself a merciless flogging you scoundrel!

Well that is the point of the movie.

 


our fate is in the hands of zeus

i wonder if uncle bitters could "donate" one of those long-necked sheep to placate the gods

16 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

our fate is in the hands of zeus

i wonder if uncle bitters could "donate" one of those long-necked sheep to placate the gods

Well they are certainly more readily available than virgins dc.

48 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well they are certainly more readily available than virgins dc.

you make a very salient point, uncle..... ah, the problems of paganism.....


Sheesh.  Very unpalatable effort at the G.  Probably even more unpalatable than one of Red's black-spotted bananas.

Guess it's back to normal now for MFC.  Let the usual MFCSS programming resume.

On 19 August 2016 at 9:42 PM, Redleg said:

Apparently a banana shortage. Leon, forget the pigs, grow bananas.

Immunology article in the paper about reversing cancer.

Actually reversing it.

All that banana cake not in vain.

Anyhow-more importantly-I'm learning to grow "vegetables" hydroponically using urine as the nutrient.

Everyone at the Gat loves getting pi55ed and stoned so it's bound to take off.

 

On 19/08/2016 at 9:42 PM, Redleg said:

Apparently a banana shortage. Leon, forget the pigs, grow bananas.

Do you really want to give the racists more ammunition?


2 hours ago, Biffen said:

Anyhow-more importantly-I'm learning to grow "vegetables" hydroponically using urine as the nutrient.

Everyone at the Gat loves getting pi55ed and stoned so it's bound to take off.

 

Ah. I get it. Hydroponic stone fruit. Yep - that must be it.

  • Author

I don't like the bad publicity the banana is getting, because of some Port Power moron fan.

 
  • Author
50 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Tautology!

Tauto was one of my favourite racehorses. Around the time of Tobin Bronze, another favourite.

Dear Uncle Bitters, went passed palatial Romsey today ( on business) and spied a gent on the side of a hill on some acreage sunning himself on the Balcony of a palatial mansion with two cucumbers over his eyes sipping a beverage of some description in a state of absolute euphoria! 

Not sure why but i thought of you!!!


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • PODCAST: Essendon

    The Demonland Podcast will air LIVE on Monday, 14th April @ the all new time of 8:00pm. Join Binman, George & I as we dissect another Demons loss at Kardinia Park to the Cats in the Round 04. Your questions and comments are a huge part of our podcast so please post anything you want to ask or say below and we'll give you a shout out on the show. If you would like to leave us a voicemail please call 03 9016 3666 and don't worry no body answers so you don't have to talk to a human.

    • 10 replies
    Demonland
  • PREGAME: Fremantle

    The Demons return home to the MCG in search of their first win for the 2025 Premiership season when they take on the Fremantle Dockers on Saturday afternoon. Who comes in and who goes out?

      • Thanks
    • 31 replies
    Demonland
  • VOTES: Essendon

    Max Gawn leads the Demonland Player of the Year ahead of Clayton Oliver, Christian Petracca, Kade Chandler and Jake Bowey. Your votes please. 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 & 1.

      • Thanks
    • 17 replies
    Demonland
  • POSTGAME: Essendon

    Despite a spirited third quarter surge, the Demons have slumped to their worst start to a season since 2012, remaining winless and second last on the ladder after a 39-point defeat to Essendon at Adelaide Oval in Gather Round.

      • Vomit
      • Sad
      • Thanks
    • 208 replies
    Demonland
  • GAMEDAY: Essendon

    It’s Game Day, and the Demons are staring down the barrel of an 0-5 start for the first time since 2012 as they take on Essendon at Adelaide Oval for Gather Round. In that forgettable season, Melbourne finally broke their drought by toppling the Bombers. Can lightning strike twice? Will the Dees turn their nightmare start around and breathe life back into 2025?

      • Like
    • 723 replies
    Demonland
  • PREVIEW: Essendon

    As the focus of the AFL moves exclusively to South Australia for Gather Round, the question is raised as to what are we going to get from the  Melbourne Football Club this weekend? Will it be a repeat of the slop fest of the last three weeks that have seen the team score a measly 174 points and concede 310 or will a return to the City of Churches and the scene where they performed at their best in 2024 act as a wakeup call and bring them out of their early season reverie?  Or will the sleepy Dees treat their fans to a reenactment of their lazy effort from the first Gather Round of two years ago when they allowed the Bombers to trample all over them on a soggy and wet Adelaide Oval? The two examples from above tell us how fickle form can be in football. Last year, a committed group of players turned up in Adelaide with a businesslike mindset. They had a plan, went in confidently and hard for the football and kicked winning scores against both home teams in a difficult environment for visitors. And they repeated that sort of effort later in the season when they played Essendon at the MCG.

      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 0 replies
    Demonland