The No T$ No B$ Thread

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

Uncle Bitter is back!! Let it be said that I made an honest attempt at rehab but the gods simply conspired against me. Let me explain.

After being given the arse off this site I decided to sit down and contemplate my failings. Then Moonie appeared at Romsey Manor. Plenty to say but sans grog. The 'lads' picked him early but I didn't listen and Moonie proceeded to drink gargantuan amounts of my alcohol with apparently no concern for the old Aussie tradition of actually buying.

I decided that going to one of those "Zen" places might help me. There is one nearby. Now this seemed to be going quite well and I was ooomming along with the best of them . However, a leotard cladded young lady appeared to be in some difficulty. The ever chivalrous Uncle Bitter attempted to assist. This led to a number of accusations ( One being that I was I trying to find her "centre" rather than my own) so I decided the best policy was to remove myself from that particular organisation.

Funny really. It had bizarre similarities to my expulsion from the gym. Young women are quite confusing really. Then there was my visit to the Primary School. Apparently there was some churlish objection to the bag of lollies. Strange world.

Then .. foolish me. I took Biffen to a Grand Final lunch at one of my clubs. Suffice to say it is now a former club.

Had a few glances at Demonland along the the way.

Some things don't change. The Snitch was sniveling and whining continuously. No surprise there..

Apparently my time in Coventry could have been shorter but for a personal reference. I shall look into this matter.

[Redleg 40,958]

He's back just in time for 41.

[beelzebub 23,380]

Welcome back Bitter...hasn't been the same without you

[Biffen 12,944]

Let me address the recent short term memory loss that Uncle Bitters has conveniently suffered in his past months bender.

Firstly ,having met our unrepentant and irrepressible squire at a certain mens establishment in town for elevenses in the lobby, things were going well until I was hit up for the "Homeless naughty teenage girls fund" which at the time seemed a worthy cause.More of that later.

In the lifts i began to regret my decision to meet the recalcitrant one ,as ever,when i noticed similar country types in the lift displaying the uncouth coarseness we expect of unsophisticated hayseeds in the big smoke.Not to be outdone in the bad manners and non-existent grooming stakes,The Squire decided to release enough methane to power a small town as the lift took us to the banquet room.

After creating a scene and having our seats moved next to the bar,the squire,unhappy as ever with the vino,insisted on an upgrade of red,which our friendly barman agreed to,and pulled out the best Lindemans.

We plonked our way through inedible food and nonsensical speeches and were asked to leave the banquet room as the Romsey squire was approaching the bargirls with offers of short term farm work,the kind mostly done on stud farms.

As I managed to persuade the truculent host to adjourn to a more private area ,i recall Moonie pulling himself out of a demonstration that had gathered on Collins st to help me carry the Country Member back to his train stop.

It was a day that did little for my social standing,and even less for charity.

[daisycutter 29,621]

It was a day that did little for my social standing,and even less for charity.

it's an ill wind that blows nobody good, biffo

[Moonshadow 17,676]

Uncle Bitter being referred to as a Country Member. Ha!

As Gough once famously said, "yes, I remember"

[bjDee 1,249]

Uncle Bitter being referred to as a Country Member. Ha!

As Gough once famously said, "yes, I remember"

The Groucho Marx quip re clubs and membership also comes to mind.

[ManDee 7,162]

Good to see remorse from the bitter one, shows how big a man he is. I've heard quite large, but that may be bragging.

[Redleg 40,958]

40

[beelzebub 23,380]

Good to see remorse from the bitter one, shows how big a man he is. I've heard quite large, but that may be bragging.

yeah...when you can fake sincerity ............

[bjDee 1,249]

yeah...when you can fake sincerity ............

...and apparently that's another Groucho Marx quote!

[old dee 23,799]

yeah...when you can fake sincerity ............

" You have got it made"

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

Well [censored] you all , Bitter is back!!

What's been happening?

Biffen is full of it - his drunken behaviour resulted in me having to prove why I should remain a member of my club. FMD!!!

And ... as for Moonie ... [censored] me .... all he can do is drink free beer.

And what about the snivelling Snitch? FMD what a pissant.

I need some cultured company. OD , how about you invite me to your sister's winery and we drink free pinot?

And I'm still hunting down the class traitor who wouldn't give me a personal reference.

And dc - I 'm having some relationship difficulties ATM - could you toss a couple of greyrinsers my way please?

[old dee 23,799]

Well [censored] all , Bitter is back!!

What's been happening?

Biffen is full of it - his drunken behaviour resulted in me having to prove why I should remain a member of my club. FMD!!!

And ... as for Moonie ... [censored] me .... all he can do is drink free beer.

And what about the snivelling Snitch? FMD what a pissant.

I need some cultured company. OD , how about you invite me to your sister's winery and we drink free pinot?

And I'm still hunting down the class traitor who wouldn't give me a personal reference.

And dc - I 'm having some relationship difficulties ATM - could you toss a couple of greyrinsers my way please?

You wont believe your bad luck Bbo.

After no vintage this year the Pinot reserves are almost exhausted and their will be no more till 2017.

Even I cannot get a free bottle.

Sad but I guess we are used to disappointment being MFC followers.

[daisycutter 29,621]

And dc - I 'm having some relationship difficulties ATM - could you toss a couple of greyrinsers my way please?

stocks are a bit low, bitters. seem to have been to a lot of funerals lately

i've got a few ideas to replenish stock so check back in a few months

you'll just ave to tighten the belt (if you get my gist) for a little longer

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

Is Biffen still supplying You certain ... ahh performance enhancers dc?

[Moonshadow 17,676]

Er, shouldn't your sig read "bitterer than ever" or "more bitter than ever"?

The bigger bit is a given.

Edited October 15, 2015 by Moonshadow

[daisycutter 29,621]

Is Biffen still supplying You certain ... ahh performance enhancers dc?

alas no, bbo. since biffo got raided by the narcs i've had to.... ahh.. find alternate sauces

[Redleg 40,958]

BBO, I know why you wanted to come back so desperately, you missed the countdown.

39 just for you.

[Earl Hood 6,086]

Well [censored] all , Bitter is back!!

What's been happening?

Biffen is full of it - his drunken behaviour resulted in me having to prove why I should remain a member of my club. FMD!!!

And ... as for Moonie ... [censored] me .... all he can do is drink free beer.

And what about the snivelling Snitch? FMD what a pissant.

I need some cultured company. OD , how about you invite me to your sister's winery and we drink free pinot?

And I'm still hunting down the class traitor who wouldn't give me a personal reference.

And dc - I 'm having some relationship difficulties ATM - could you toss a couple of greyrinsers my way please?

Ahh BBO how good it is to read your dulcet tones again after your totally unfair enforced vacation. Only Biffen knows how many strings I tried to pull to overturn your ban and I more than anyone knows about the power of pulling strings! I battled strongly in your defence but the powers that be could not be swayed. Their demands were too much, you would not want to know the details.

So be it but you are back and all is well, as if nothing has happened. Remember in adversity we must all stick together, that is my motto!

[daisycutter 29,621]

Ahh BBO how good it is to read your dulcet tones again after your totally unfair enforced vacation. Only Biffen knows how many strings I tried to pull to overturn your ban and I more than anyone knows about the power of pulling strings! I battled strongly in your defence but the powers that be could not be swayed. Their demands were too much, you would not want to know the details.

So be it but you are back and all is well, as if nothing has happened. Remember in adversity we must all stick together, that is my motto!

earl, i suppose with the dumping of ex pm abbott your influence in matters of high state must be waning. you need to move on and get more into malcolm's circle of influence

[bjDee 1,249]

earl, i suppose with the dumping of ex pm abbott your influence in matters of high state must be waning. you need to move on and get more into malcolm's circle of influence

So an Earl and a Republican walk into a bar......

Nope, don't think that'll work. There's no punchline to match that.

[beelzebub 23,380]

And in Good News today there will be no Melbourne players amongst the International Rules squad taking on Ireland.

Any fears of injuries preventing any of Demons taking to the preseason training have been laid to rest..

in other news...

[H_T 3,049]

And in Good News today there will be no Melbourne players amongst the International Rules squad taking on Ireland.

Any fears of injuries preventing any of Demons taking to the preseason training have been laid to rest..

in other news...

Phew!

38

[daisycutter 29,621]

another exciting trade day

if the afl have any brains they will extend trade period to 3 weeks and start a trade tv channel in full hd