Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Demonland

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

The No T$ No B$ Thread

Featured Replies

with a 66.6% winning rate, melbourne fc finish 2nd in the afl finals series

  • methos      100%
  • demons       66.6%
  • colonwood  50%
  • toiges          50%
 
49 minutes ago, DemonFrog said:

Old ages does mellow one down. But old habits are hard to change.

However, as a true friend, did you give him a membership form for the Mighty Dees?

Arh no DF that might have been going a little bit too far just a few hours after the loss. 

 

  • Author
58 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

with a 66.6% winning rate, melbourne fc finish 2nd in the afl finals series

  • methos      100%
  • demons       66.6%
  • colonwood  50%
  • toiges          50%

Is there a cup or flag for that?

 
1 hour ago, daisycutter said:

with a 66.6% winning rate, melbourne fc finish 2nd in the afl finals series

  • methos      100%
  • demons       66.6%
  • colonwood  50%
  • toiges          50%

We did it!

13 minutes ago, Redleg said:

Is there a cup or flag for that?

i'm still constructing it, mr. leg


14 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

i'm still constructing it, mr. leg

I would not bother dc the MCC would probably lose it!

57 minutes ago, Redleg said:

Is there a cup or flag for that?

I sure you could buy something from the Demons Shop.

  • Author
2 minutes ago, DemonFrog said:

I sure you could buy something from the Demons Shop.

Now at a big end of season discount.

 

So many Dee supporters real hate Collingwood and all those who sail on her.

I have really received SMS from Beagle supporters bragging about their win. Maybe I can they they cheated with a sheaping off the mark. That comment seems to upset Collingwood people.

Oh well off to make a banana smoothie for breakfast.

  • Author

Have we got anyone yet? No, well we are f....d.


11 hours ago, Whispering_Jack said:

We’re in a restaurant and Redleg is about to order the banana fritters. After he eats it, he’ll be f.....d.

Two lawyers in a restaurant FMD! I couldn't come up with a joke for that but here's a true story.

I recently read that the major research universities are removing rats from laboratory experiments and replacing them with lawyers.

They gave three reasons for this-

        There are more lawyers than rats

        Laboratory assistants grieve when a rat dies.

        There are some things even a rat won't do.

 

  • Author
4 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Two lawyers in a restaurant FMD! I couldn't come up with a joke for that but here's a true story.

I recently read that the major research universities are removing rats from laboratory experiments and replacing them with lawyers.

They gave three reasons for this-

        There are more lawyers than rats

        Laboratory assistants grieve when a rat dies.

        There are some things even a rat won't do.

 

Next you will tell me about the joke, what is a ship load of lawyers sunk on the bottom of the ocean? Answer " a good start".

What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.

 

(fate in the balence...?)


  • Author
19 minutes ago, Moonshadow said:

What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.

 

(fate in the balence...?)

Someone has made a big Gaff here starting this crap.

I am torn between staying at DL or moving to BigFooty, who have promised me a huge stipend.

 

 

 

  • Author
15 minutes ago, beelzebub said:

 

 

 

Your best post in some time.

40 minutes ago, Redleg said:

Your best post in some time.

Couldn't think of anything to add... So I did :)


2 hours ago, Redleg said:

Someone has made a big Gaff here starting this crap.

I am torn between staying at DL or moving to BigFooty, who have promised me a huge stipend.

As a free agent, its now your choice if you move.

At is unless Mr Bitters can match their offer.

This may be blasphemy in this thread, but I need to confess my sins, I've moved on from banana bread and taken a liking to pear-and-raspberry bread!

Why am I sharing this? I think just to keep the thread bumped up, as it clearly has more useful information in it than certain other overactive threads around here.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 120?

Your Honour

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?

Senator.

 
  • Author
1 hour ago, Little Goffy said:

This may be blasphemy in this thread, but I need to confess my sins, I've moved on from banana bread and taken a liking to pear-and-raspberry bread!

 

One of the more disgusting things I have seen posted on Demonlander.

  • Author
1 hour ago, Moonshadow said:

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 120?

Your Honour

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?

Senator.

It is so easy for people to pick on the defenceless minorities. You should be ashamed of yourself.

Edited by Redleg


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • NON-MFC: Round 01

    With Opening Round done and dusted, Round 1 sees the full AFL competition finally swing into action for 2026. Discuss all the games this week that do not involve the Dees, share your tips, and let us know which results would suit Demons best.

      • Like
    • 173 replies
  • PODCAST: 2026 Season Preview

    The boys previewed the 2026 Season sharing their early impressions of the new coach, the new players, observations from preseason training, and what they've made of the new game style. They also look ahead to the season with their predictions, the players they expect to rise, their expectations for the team, and what they see as a realistic pass mark for Melbourne in 2026.

      • Clap
      • Love
      • Like
    • 14 replies
  • PREVIEW: St. Kilda

    When the Demons blew their 46-point lead at Marvel Stadium in Round 20 last year, the fallout was enormous. Like an event straight out of a Shakespearean tragedy, Melbourne’s final-quarter collapse left fans reeling and the club grappling with the aftermath. 

      • Clap
      • Love
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 10 replies
  • PREGAME: St. Kilda

    With just over two weeks until their opening match of the 2026 AFL Premiership season, the Demons are already well on the path to redemption and have the Saints firmly in their sights ahead of their mid-March clash at the MCG. What do you think the team will look like when they run out on to the G?

      • Clap
      • Love
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 612 replies
  • NON-MFC: 2026 Opening Round

    Finally the 2026 AFL Premiership Season is upon us. While Melbourne sits out Opening Round, there is still plenty of footy to enjoy with five non-MFC clashes to kick off the new season. It all begins on Thursday night with a blockbuster at the SCG as Sydney hosts Carlton in what should be a strong early test for both sides. On Friday night, Gold Coast gets its chance to open the season in front of a home crowd when the Suns and Christian Petracca take on Geelong at People First Stadium. Saturday features a double-header, starting in the afternoon with Greater Western Sydney and Clayton Oliver meeting the Hawks at Engie Stadium. That is followed on Saturday night by Brisbane Lions hosting the Western Bulldogs at the Gabba, with the Lions embarking on their campaign to win the Threepeat. Opening Round wraps up on Sunday night at the MCG, where St Kilda takes on Collingwood in the only game in town in the first week of the season. There is no shortage of storylines across the round, so discuss all the action from the non-MFC games of Opening Round.

      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 557 replies
  • REPORT: Richmond

    Mars is not usually a place known for lighting strikes but on Friday evening it happened twice in the vicinity of the stadium in Ballarat that carries the name and is a half completed building site with limited capacity for spectators.

      • Love
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 4 replies

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.