The No T$ No B$ Thread

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

On ‎28‎/‎02‎/‎2016 at 11:04 AM, Dr John Dee said:

I presume you haven't quite got the hang of this virtual reality thing when you're practising your disciplinary techniques, BBO.

As for the local group, who pays fees until they're obliged to? They're looking forward to your efforts to pursue that obligation.

Arrgh, there's the rub, now I can see why you are a Dr Dr, and not just your standard garden variety alchemist.

You have spanked the nail on the head!!!

You see, my life is virtual reality - I think.

Edited February 29, 2016 by Bitter but optimistic
typo

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

Late breaking news!!! Apparently Biffen did get found out and was arrested when leaving the family day at luna Park!

[Redleg 40,198]

Went to the family day with Mrs. Redleg, our daughter and grand daughter number 1. Biggest crowd at a Dees family day in the last few years. 

[old dee 23,492]

26 minutes ago, Redleg said:

Went to the family day with Mrs. Redleg, our daughter and grand daughter number 1. Biggest crowd at a Dees family day in the last few years. 

My wife, daughter and GD were there Mr. Leg.

all enjoyed it. They were surprised at the numbers.

Mrs OD was impressed she saw no bogans and thought the supporters were nice.

I have been telling her that for 45 years obviously Pies supporters are slow learners.

 

[Whispering_Jack 29,203]

7 minutes ago, old dee said:

My wife, daughter and GD were there Mr. Leg.

all enjoyed it. They were surprised at the numbers.

Mrs OD was impressed she saw no bogans and thought the supporters were nice.

I have been telling her that for 45 years obviously Pies supporters are slow learners.

 

What did she expect when we have such fine upstanding supporters as BBO, Earl Hood and Biffen?

[beelzebub 23,198]

3 minutes ago, Whispering_Jack said:

What did she expect when we have such fine upstanding supporters as BBO, Earl Hood and Biffen?

Goes without saying really.... And yet we do 

[Earl Hood 6,057]

I am seeking advice from my fellow Dlanders. It has recently come to my attention an accusation that my favourite scullery maid, Conchita has been stealing from my wine collection! I have checked the cellar and yes there are bottles of Tempranillo, Sangiovese and Merlot missing ( could be BBO though) but then again my bookkeeping on these matters can be a bit erratic at times. I however feel betrayed, I brought my helper over from Columbia for her unique cleaning skills on a 457 Visa. I offered her the median wage of $55K per year and the usual requirement that she accompany my main Man, Hudson to the ATM to withdraw $500 every week to put back to our housekeeping fund. What more can I do? 

Edited March 1, 2016 by Earl Hood

[bjDee 1,249]

Fear not Earl. I can put you in touch with helpers who can take your wine for a far lower annual wage. I can have them drain the contents and return the bottles with an appropriate substitute. Might even do it myself.

 

[Biffen 12,829]

4 hours ago, Redleg said:

Went to the family day with Mrs. Redleg, our daughter and grand daughter number 1. Biggest crowd at a Dees family day in the last few years. 

I had to push many children aside to get on the free rides before 11am. Also had to shove some kids and grannies aside to get selfies with the players .I am surprised so many turned up to sunny St Kilda and next year I will be selling some merch to the kids from the famous Garwick. 

That is if we haven't been bulldozed by the white shoe brigade.

 

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

9 hours ago, Earl Hood said:

I am seeking advice from my fellow Dlanders. It has recently come to my attention an accusation that my favourite scullery maid, Conchita has been stealing from my wine collection! I have checked the cellar and yes there are bottles of Tempranillo, Sangiovese and Merlot missing ( could be BBO though) but then again my bookkeeping on these matters can be a bit erratic at times. I however feel betrayed, I brought my helper over from Columbia for her unique cleaning skills on a 457 Visa. I offered her the median wage of $55K per year and the usual requirement that she accompany my main Man, Hudson to the ATM to withdraw $500 every week to put back to our housekeeping fund. What more can I do? 

Well your pay is certainly reasonable Earl but does Conchita  adhere to the ..err .. "appropriate" dress code for one of her station?

As the for above "wines", you should be thankful they are gone from your collection. Fill the gaps with some decent shiraz.

[Moonshadow 17,542]

10 hours ago, Earl Hood said:

I am seeking advice from my fellow Dlanders. It has recently come to my attention an accusation that my favourite scullery maid, Conchita has been stealing from my wine collection! I have checked the cellar and yes there are bottles of Tempranillo, Sangiovese and Merlot missing ( could be BBO though) but then again my bookkeeping on these matters can be a bit erratic at times. I however feel betrayed, I brought my helper over from Columbia for her unique cleaning skills on a 457 Visa. I offered her the median wage of $55K per year and the usual requirement that she accompany my main Man, Hudson to the ATM to withdraw $500 every week to put back to our housekeeping fund. What more can I do? 

Conchita Wurst by any chance Earl?

[Redleg 40,198]

9 hours ago, Biffen said:

I had to push many children aside to get on the free rides before 11am. Also had to shove some kids and grannies aside to get selfies with the players .I am surprised so many turned up to sunny St Kilda and next year I will be selling some merch to the kids from the famous Garwick. 

That is if we haven't been bulldozed by the white shoe brigade.

 

I recall someone pushing Mrs. Redleg out of the way, it must have been you.

[old dee 23,492]

1 minute ago, Redleg said:

I recall someone pushing Mrs. Redleg out of the way, it must have been you.

Fortunately for Biff he did not push Mrs OD as the wrath of a Collingwood supporting grand mother would have been more than he could have defended.

With or without her umbrella!

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

23 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Conchita Wurst by any chance Earl?

Wouldn't think so Moon. One of Earl Hood's aristocratic background and breeding would insist on his maids being clean shaven, surely?

[Moonshadow 17,542]

2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Wouldn't think so Moon. One of Earl Hood's aristocratic background and breeding would insist on his maids being clean shaven, surely?

Yes, but Earl is a sophisticate with great taste in emerging music talent. Amongst other, er, how shall I say...... dutiful obligations, I reckon he'd like his servants to sing for their supper.

[Dr John Dee 1,057]

2 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Yes, but Earl is a sophisticate with great taste in emerging music talent. Amongst other, er, how shall I say...... dutiful obligations, I reckon he'd like his servants to sing for their supper.

Are you referring to Earl's droit de seigneur, Moonie? I'm sure tradition and bloodline would expect nothing less.

[jackaub 1,402]

5 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Wouldn't think so Moon. One of Earl Hood's aristocratic background and breeding would insist on his maids being clean shaven, surely?

Hey Bitter 

I was perusing the commercial real estate lists recently ( As I am sure many of us do ) and I NOTICE THE FREEHOLD OF THE GAT IS FOR SALE - VACANT POSSESSION!!!! TRUE OR JUST A RUMOUR? WHAT ABOUT THE IN-MATES, WHERE WILL THEY GO?

[daisycutter 29,336]

plenty of room at romsey manor. lads are quite excited

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

35 minutes ago, jackaub said:

Hey Bitter 

I was perusing the commercial real estate lists recently ( As I am sure many of us do ) and I NOTICE THE FREEHOLD OF THE GAT IS FOR SALE - VACANT POSSESSION!!!! TRUE OR JUST A RUMOUR? WHAT ABOUT THE IN-MATES, WHERE WILL THEY GO?

Well I have visited The Gat on occasion - purely business you understand - and as such business can be conducted elsewhere its sale will only impact on me for reasons of nostalgia. 

Biffen, however, as a resident of said establishment has not been the same since its sale was announced. If you wish to know more, I suggest you raise the subject (cautiously) with him.

[Bitter but optimistic 22,065]

1 hour ago, Dr John Dee said:

Are you referring to Earl's droit de seigneur, Moonie? I'm sure tradition and bloodline would expect nothing less.

A very civilised idea ( if you are of the male aristocracy).

Anyway doc who has the primae noctis   rights in Hopping Dicks? I imagine that would be just one of many arcane rituals prevalent in your neck of the backwoods.

[Moonshadow 17,542]

5 hours ago, Dr John Dee said:

Are you referring to Earl's droit de seigneur, Moonie? I'm sure tradition and bloodline would expect nothing less.

Good doctor, until same sex marriage is legal in this unfair land,  droit de seigneur is moot in so far as Earl's servants are concerned 

[Earl Hood 6,057]

On 3 March 2016 at 0:55 PM, Dr John Dee said:

Are you referring to Earl's droit de seigneur, Moonie? I'm sure tradition and bloodline would expect nothing less.

Good heavens a simple request for advice about one of my employees degenerates into smutty discussions, as if between a group of year 7 boys of transvestites and lords taking first dibs at the local village virgin. No wonder I try to limit my contact with the proletariat!

[Moonshadow 17,542]

2 minutes ago, Earl Hood said:

Good heavens a simple request for advice about one of my employees degenerates into smutty discussions, as if between a group of year 7 boys of transvestites and lords taking first dibs at the local village virgin. No wonder I try to limit my contact with the proletariat!

Perfect summary of BBOs ideal life earl.

[Biffen 12,829]

9 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

Perfect summary of BBOs ideal life earl.

 

9 hours ago, Earl Hood said:

Good heavens a simple request for advice about one of my employees degenerates into smutty discussions, as if between a group of year 7 boys of transvestites and lords taking first dibs at the local village virgin. No wonder I try to limit my contact with the proletariat!

I did not pick you for a Scotch Collegian Earl but now that you've revealed the boarding house rituals I suppose Le chat est libre de Le sac.

may as well reveal the truth about our democracy and the masons now. You've really given too much info to the peasants who are,as ever, revolting.

[Biffen 12,829]

On 3 March 2016 at 1:47 PM, jackaub said:

Hey Bitter 

I was perusing the commercial real estate lists recently ( As I am sure many of us do ) and I NOTICE THE FREEHOLD OF THE GAT IS FOR SALE - VACANT POSSESSION!!!! TRUE OR JUST A RUMOUR? WHAT ABOUT THE IN-MATES, WHERE WILL THEY GO?

Jackaub, 

fear not- yours truly will make my usual 7 cents in the dollar for every single transaction that involves actual money.my asset base, my lovely collegues here, have new digs arranged by moi. Many of them have organised pre payment and wisely deposit their down payments every second Thursday .the future of these wise and thrifty travellers is guaranteed. With the advent of global warming- the homeless need only fear the rising tides of the ocean and not the winds of change.