Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Demonland

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (ā‹®) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

1 minute ago, beelzebub said:

thought for sure you'd paint him a picture Ā !!Ā :rolleyes:

Well if I was a painter bb, I certainly wouldn't use Biffen'sĀ  SCATtergun approach.Ā 

Ā 
56 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well if I was a painter bb, I certainly wouldn't use Biffen'sĀ  SCATtergun approach.Ā 

wouldnt have taken the G and G approach ? Ā I'm surprised :unsure:Ā 

On 20/12/2016 at 6:13 PM, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well if I was a painter bb, I certainly wouldn't use Biffen'sĀ  SCATtergun approach.Ā 

Wouldn't want to be around if he lets looseĀ :rolleyes:

Ā 

and now for something completely different......................(spoken with an american accent (lol).....

An engineer dies and goes to hell. After a while, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort there and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, hell has air conditioning, flushing toilets, water fountains and escalators - making the engineer a pretty popular guy.

One day God phones Satan up and asks with a sneer: ā€œHey buddy, how’s it goin down there?ā€

Satan snickered back, ā€œThings are going great actually. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, escalators and the works. Hell, there’s no telling what this engineer guy is gonna come up with next.ā€

God replies, ā€œWhat? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake - he should never have been sent there; send him back up.ā€

To which Satan replied, ā€œNo way dude. I like having an engineer on staff, I’m keepin him.ā€

God retorted, ā€œSend him up here or I’ll sue.ā€

Satan laughs loudly and answers, ā€œYeah, right. And just where are you gonna find a lawyer?ā€

31 minutes ago, daisycutter said:

and now for something completely different......................(spoken with an american accent (lol).....

An engineer dies and goes to hell. After a while, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort there and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, hell has air conditioning, flushing toilets, water fountains and escalators - making the engineer a pretty popular guy.

One day God phones Satan up and asks with a sneer: ā€œHey buddy, how’s it goin down there?ā€

Satan snickered back, ā€œThings are going great actually. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, escalators and the works. Hell, there’s no telling what this engineer guy is gonna come up with next.ā€

God replies, ā€œWhat? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake - he should never have been sent there; send him back up.ā€

To which Satan replied, ā€œNo way dude. I like having an engineer on staff, I’m keepin him.ā€

God retorted, ā€œSend him up here or I’ll sue.ā€

Satan laughs loudly and answers, ā€œYeah, right. And just where are you gonna find a lawyer?ā€

Ā Heaven sounds like Chadstone.

I think I'd prefer the other at this time of year .

At least Red will be able to shout lunch.


Chadstone is Hell

On ā€Ž12ā€Ž/ā€Ž22ā€Ž/ā€Ž2016 at 3:42 PM, beelzebub said:

Wouldn't want to be around if he lets looseĀ :rolleyes:

No sane person would bb.

At least not without the gear you would wear at a Chernobyl type of event.Ā 

Ā 
On 22 December 2016 at 8:18 PM, daisycutter said:

and now for something completely different......................(spoken with an american accent (lol).....

An engineer dies and goes to hell. After a while, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort there and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, hell has air conditioning, flushing toilets, water fountains and escalators - making the engineer a pretty popular guy.

One day God phones Satan up and asks with a sneer: ā€œHey buddy, how’s it goin down there?ā€

Satan snickered back, ā€œThings are going great actually. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, escalators and the works. Hell, there’s no telling what this engineer guy is gonna come up with next.ā€

God replies, ā€œWhat? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake - he should never have been sent there; send him back up.ā€

To which Satan replied, ā€œNo way dude. I like having an engineer on staff, I’m keepin him.ā€

God retorted, ā€œSend him up here or I’ll sue.ā€

Satan laughs loudly and answers, ā€œYeah, right. And just where are you gonna find a lawyer?ā€

DC where are the bean counters? Obviously they are not in hell because the engineer would normally be bogged down developing numerous cost benefit analyses and endless compliance paperwork and would end up buildingĀ nothing! I can't believe such types are in heaven, they must be in purgatory?Ā 

1 hour ago, Earl Hood said:

DC where are the bean counters? Obviously they are not in hell because the engineer would normally be bogged down developing numerous cost benefit analyses and endless compliance paperwork and would end up buildingĀ nothing! I can't believe such types are in heaven, they must be in purgatory?Ā 

earl, i'd imagine doing very nicely in one of many tax havens


  • Author

Merry Xmas guys and a happy and safe New Year to you all.

Go Dees.

To all my many friendsĀ Ā Ā  friend.

To whoever might GAF about what I say - Happy Christmas!

May your wine be excellent, your fantasies unlikely and your wallet undamaged.

Oh but who needs all this sentimental bullshlt anyway !!Ā 

Bah ..humbug !!

Happy non-specific day to those who bother with it ...

:unsure:

Ā 

:rolleyes:

didn't buy it huh !!

Ok Ā Merry Christmas

can't wait for the really bad cracker jokes !!

Merry Christmas to all, and I hope we all get the present we are hoping for in late September, 2017!


6 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

To all my many friendsĀ Ā Ā  friend.

To whoever might GAF about what I say - Happy Christmas!

May your wine be excellent, your fantasies unlikely and your wallet undamaged.

To all my great pals on Demonland, Uncle, Daisy, Hemmingway, Redleg, Beezle, Earl Hood,Biffen and even Dazz;le man, and anyone else who I have not mentionedĀ 

Have a good one with Family and an even better 2017 cheers PF

"I wish I knew what I wanted to be, when a wanted to be what I am today"

Edited by picket fence

On 24/12/2016 at 1:16 PM, Red and Bluebeard said:

Merry Christmas to all, and I hope we all get the present we are hoping for in late September, 2017!

Are there actual AFL games in September?

Now a question - probably best answered by Moonie or Earl Hood..

One of Uncle's many admirers produced a voucher to an eatery called Bopha Devi and I'm wondering whether or not I need to bun up to attend such a place?


2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Now a question - probably best answered by Moonie or Earl Hood..

One of Uncle's many admirers produced a voucher to an eatery called Bopha Devi and I'm wondering whether or not I need to bun up to attend such a place?

Cambodian food done very nicely. Should be right up your alley Uncle, as Mrs Bitter tells me you like it hot n spicy.

2 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Now a question - probably best answered by Moonie or Earl Hood..

One of Uncle's many admirers produced a voucher to an eatery called Bopha Devi and I'm wondering whether or not I need to bun up to attend such a place?

uncle, just remember what faulty said "don't mention pol pot"

14 hours ago, DemonFrog said:

Are there actual AFL games in September?

Believe it or not, yes! I have even been to some, albeit many moons ago ...

Ā 
11 hours ago, daisycutter said:

uncle, just remember what faulty said "don't mention pol pot"

Sounds like the counter meal at the local rubbity ... :-)

Ā 

17 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Well hello Frogger! Been hiding in the swamp have you?

Hi Mr Bitters

Just been busy at work now that I am running the place for the next six months.

I hope everyone one has a safe and happy new year.Ā 

Keep up all your good work in Demonland.

Ā 


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • DRAFT: The Next Generation

    It was not long after the announcement that Melbourne's former number 1 draft pick Tom Scully was departing the club following 31 games and two relatively unremarkable seasons to join expansion team, the Greater Western Giants, on a six-year contract worth about $6 million, that a parody song based on Adele's hit "Someone Like You" surfaced on social media. The artist expressed lament over Scully's departure in song, culminating in the promise, "Never mind, we'll find someone like you," although I suspect that the undertone of bitterness in this version exceeded that of the original.

    • 7 replies
  • AFLW REPORT: Brisbane

    AĀ steamyĀ SpringfieldĀ evening set the stage for a blockbusterĀ top-fourĀ clash between two AFLW heavyweights.Ā Brisbane, the bookies’ favourites, hosted Melbourne at a heaving Brighton Homes Arena, with 5,022 fans packing in—the biggest crowd for a Melbourne game this season.Ā It was the 11th meeting between these fierce rivals, with the Dees holding a narrow 6–4 edge. ButĀ whileĀ the LionsĀ broughtĀ theĀ chaos andĀ roared loudest, the DemonsĀ aren’t doneĀ yet.

    • 5 replies
  • Welcome to Demonland: Picks 7 & 8

    The Demons have acquired two first round picks in Picks 7 & 8 in the 2025 AFL National Draft.

      • Like
    • 481 replies
  • Farewell Clayton Oliver

    The Demons have traded 4 time Club Champion Clayton Oliver to the GWS Giants for a Future Third Rounder whilst paying a significant portion of his salary each year.

      • Shocked
      • Like
    • 2,051 replies
  • Farewell Christian Petracca

    The Demons have traded Norm Smith Medalist Christian Petracca to the Gold Coast Suns for 3 First Round Draft Picks.

      • Haha
      • Like
    • 1,742 replies
  • Welcome to Demonland: Jack Steele

    In a late Trade the Demons have secured the services of St. Kilda Captain Jack Steele in a move to bolster their midfield in the absence of Christian Petracca and Clayton Oliver.

    • 325 replies

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.