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The No T$ No B$ Thread

Featured Replies

 
13 minutes ago, Whispering_Jack said:

I have a confession to make. 

I just started watching the latest series of X-files and I have no stomach for watching purely because Special Agent Mulder's sidekick has this funny name.

Ichabod Mudd?

 
15 hours ago, Maple Demon said:

Mr. Shadow, do you know if Uncle Bitter and Biffen have stayed out of trouble this summer?

I take it that's a rhetorical question Maple. Of course the answer is no.

Biffen was on a drug fuelled stupor for a month or two and has only just come back on board sober, and Bitters has been busy offending Demonland's own moral compass by going "boo!" In his face and poking a hallitosis riddled tounge out at him.

5 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

I take it that's a rhetorical question Maple. Of course the answer is no.

Biffen was on a drug fuelled stupor for a month or two and has only just come back on board sober, and Bitters has been busy offending Demonland's own moral compass by going "boo!" In his face and poking a hallitosis riddled tounge out at him.

So, all in all, a quiet summer for our impressionable young lads....


30 minutes ago, Maple Demon said:

So, all in all, a quiet summer for our impressionable young lads....

maple, i don't think uncle bitters has been a lad since many long years, he's just a lecherous old sozzled geezer now

Uncle Bitter, I read on here that you were in Canberra. Thought they would have kept you around as a political consultant.

On 15 March 2016 at 7:52 PM, Dr John Dee said:

I don’t know to which advertisement you refer, but lest it afford you any opportunity for further innuendo or vulgarity I should say in my defence that, as far as I am aware, all evidence* trace of my dealings with the nation’s leaders was removed by the Federal authorities many years ago. It is unlikely therefore to refer to my medical* therapeutic practices, although I would remind you that the stain on a reputation is far more indelible than any to be found on a mere, fading affiche in the gradually gentrifying location of Fyshwick (of course, were I the gentleman in question I presume I would have takes such stains as ample proof of the success of my potions).

Having escaped* decamped to the north and discovered the field generally occupied by mountebanks and hucksters of many stripes all claiming some impossible association with Byron Bay, I decided that there was little opportunity for a simple, honest apothecary* alchemist such as I to earn a living taking advantage of the miseries of those whose ambitions outstrip their capabilities in matters of the marital (or other) bed. I am now occupied in other pursuits which your insinuations can only begin to guess at.

Suffice it to say that, having recently taken over the presidency of the Hopping Dicks Progress Association in a well-drilled putsch, one project involves organising one of those twinning arrangements with a suitable village in the Rhône region. This may entail significant absences and substantial payments to suitable ‘advisors’ as negotiations unfold.

 

* amendments introduced on legal advice. As to any imputations about my criminal past, let me just say that no proceeding of a court has ever been successfully concluded in relation to allegations or indictments against me.

 

 

I've had a very busy and trying week Dr and have only now had the opportunity to ponder your eloquent obfuscations. However, let us not confuse eloquence with dissembling ! But .... I suppose past is past and I will not press the matter of you making further emissions admissions about your grubby history. 

I will be most interested to observe how your already debauched  little  hamlet will advance ( or not) under your stewardship. No doubt nepotism and corruption will rear their various heads and winners and losers will emerge.  And, speaking of nepotism, I also give fair warning that I intend to pursue your local BDSM club for payment of outstanding fees to the national body. This the corporate age and it  can no longer hide behind its sloganizing and rhetoric about being a family operated concern.

 
On ‎17‎/‎03‎/‎2016 at 6:41 PM, Maple Demon said:

Uncle Bitter, I read on here that you were in Canberra. Thought they would have kept you around as a political consultant.

Well I'm always open to suggestions Mable and since my marriage counselling business hasn't really taken off as yet .....

  • Author

I don't have to water the banana tree in the garden today, after all the rain. Can spend the free time thinking about the Dees.


8 hours ago, Redleg said:

I don't have to water the banana tree in the garden today, after all the rain. Can spend the free time thinking about the Dees.

After a sufficient dose of Redtube I'm guessing.

  • Author
4 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

After a sufficient dose of Redtube I'm guessing.

Were you at my place?

  • Author
2 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Jesus did your missus fess up?

Not yet, as I wouldn't have had to ask you if she had.


  • Author
4 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Bloody sneaky lawyer.

That's what it says on my business card.

1 minute ago, Redleg said:

That's what it says on my business card.

You could shorten it to "Lawyer" as the rest is virtually superfluous.

2 minutes ago, Biffen said:

You could shorten it to "Lawyer" as the rest is virtually superfluous.

I think you mean redundant?

2 minutes ago, Biffen said:

You could shorten it to "Lawyer" as the rest is virtually superfluous.

Was that sanctimonious dead bastard Hemingway ever a lawyer Biff?


2 minutes ago, Biffen said:

You could shorten it to "Lawyer" as the rest is virtually superfluous.

Was that sanctimonious dead bastard Hemingway ever a lawyer Biff?

2 minutes ago, Biffen said:

You could shorten it to "Lawyer" as the rest is virtually superfluous.

Was that sanctimonious dead bastard Hemingway ever a lawyer Biff?

3 minutes ago, Earl Hood said:

I think you mean redundant?

Extraneous.

 
17 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Bloody sneaky lawyer.

 
A man walks into a bar. 
 
He sees a beautiful, well-dressed woman sitting on a barstool alone. 
 
He sits down next to her and says, "Hi there, how's it going tonight?"
 
She turns to him, looks him straight in the eyes and says, "I'll screw anybody, any time, any where, any place, it doesn't matter to me."
 
The guy raises his eyebrows and says, "No kidding? What law firm do you work for?"
38 minutes ago, Biffen said:

Extraneous.

or hyperbolic

Edited by daisycutter


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