With Melbourne’s season hanging on a thread, Saturday night’s game against North Melbourne unfolded like a scene in a hospital emergency department. 

The patient presented to the ward in a bad way. Doctors and nurses pumped life-saving medication into his body and, in the ensuing half hour, he responded with blood returning to his cheeks as he stirred back to life. After a slight relapse, the nurses pumped further medication into the bloodstream and the prognosis started looking good as the next hour ticked by. The patient even sat up momentarily.

Suddenly, without warning, the vital signs displayed on his bedside screen went haywire and the patient was again in peril. It took all of the skills of the experienced ER ward surgeons, helped by a team of young interns, to step in and save the day. At last report, the patient was resting in a stable condition but still on life support. There’s a long way to go but he’s hanging on … for the time being.

Speaking of hospitals, welcome to Melbourne’s 2024 campaign in the post superstar phase. But it’s not just the fact that Christian Petracca‘s internal injuries will keep him out of the game for at least the rest of this home and away season that are keeping coach Simon Goodwin up at night. Leaving aside the usual media swarm and the naysayers who smell blood when a team’s going through hard times, Goody’s facing attack from all sides in the football world and not just about the unenviable task of mending the midfield in his star player’s absence and the fact that another of his superstars in Clayton Oliver is in a career slump. 

There’s the potential problem of overworking his skipper and champion ruckman who battles on with little support, the occasional defensive lapses and then, there’s the long-running matter of connection when going into attack which refuses to be resolved and rears its head with too many goalless (and scoreless) quarters and with most of the forwards also in a form slump. 

Add to this, the fact that a quiet rebuild is going on in the background. Of the teams competing in Round 15, Melbourne fielded the most players aged 22 and under with ten, compared to North Melbourne’s eight. Geelong had only four players in this category; Brisbane, Carlton, Essendon, Sydney and West Coast had five. It’s great to see so many young faces in the team working manfully but having plenty of youth and inexperience in the group also poses challenges in the heat of a tight battle. 

Granted that you can’t fix all of the issues surrounding a major form slump overnight, there are still some positive vibes out of all of this. The impending return of Jake Lever who is so important in the defensive structure, will help. Steven May kept Nick Larkey goalless in a peerless defensive performance and the return of his partner in crime in defence is timely in light of the do or die contest coming up on Friday night in Brizvegas.

Despite the fact that North’s up and coming midfield won the clearance battles, Goodwin’s first effort on the work in progress in this area produced some promising signs. Jack Viney was an absolute beast as he worked hard under the skipper’s gaze and while Oliver was shut out under the close watch of Will Phillips. 

Into the breach came Trent Rivers who had plenty of time and a reasonable return lining up in centre bounces. Tom Sparrow had some good moments as well and second gamer Koltyn Tholstrup was promising at half-forward. It will be a while before he can be considered in the same light as Petracca but there were some really great signs. And how about that great lifesaving cameo run down by Kynan Brown that virtually ensured the win for his team?

Despite the continuing relative dysfunction of the forward line, there was some signs of a pulse with Disco Turner kicking a couple and Harry Petty taking six marks and scoring a goal. Some more consistency and a return to goal scoring form from the likes of Bailey Fritsch, Kozzie Pickett and Kade Chandler are hopefully just around the corner. 

Indeed, a return to form of the likes of Oliver, Fritsch and co on the big stage up north next week is exactly what the doctor ordered.

MELBOURNE 5.2.32 6.4.40 11.4.70 11.4.70

NORTH MELBOURNE 1.2.8 3.7.25 5.7.37 10.7.67

GOALS 

MELBOURNE Turner 2 Chandler Gawn McDonald Petty Pickett Rivers Sparrow van Rooyen

NORTH MELBOURNE Zurhaar 4 Ford Sheezel 2 Davies-Uniacke Simpkin 

BEST

MELBOURNE Viney May Rivers Gawn Sparrow Neal-Bullen

NORTH MELBOURNE Davies-Uniacke Wardlaw Sheezel Zurhaar Phillips Simpkin

INJURIES 

MELBOURNE Christian Salem (knee)

NORTH MELBOURNE Nil

REPORTS

MELBOURNE Nil

NORTH MELBOURNE Nil

SUBSTITUTIONS 

MELBOURNE Kynan Brown (replaced Christian Salem in the fourth quarter)

NORTH MELBOURNE Dylan Stephens (replaced Toby Pink in the third quarter)

UMPIRES Donlon Haussen Heffernan Wallace

CROWD 28,774 at The MCG

Loved the extension of the ER metaphor. 
Here’s hoping that the team’s form can rise to similar heights. 

Ten players 22 or under is very sobering indeed but it will be a real lift if they all make the grade at some point.

15 minutes ago, DeeZone said:

Ten players 22 or under is very sobering indeed but it will be a real lift if they all make the grade at some point.

Has any one in the footy media noticed?

1 minute ago, sue said:

Has any one in the footy media noticed?

should be a talking point for daniel hoyne, you'd think

1 minute ago, sue said:

Has any one in the footy media noticed?

That would take some research sue so that’s not going to happen, it’s not the narrative that they are seeking.

2 hours ago, Whispering_Jack said:

Why was 22 chosen as the benchmark?

would the result differ much at 21 or 23 24 25 or is 22 the best for a compelling argument here?

im not disputing that we have a young list but how was that benchmark of young arrived at?

If we are on life support maybe we could be offered morphine at the ground, would certainly make the watching a more pleasant experience.

One of the best non-match report, match reports!

Thank you!

23 minutes ago, dino rover said:

Why was 22 chosen as the benchmark?

would the result differ much at 21 or 23 24 25 or is 22 the best for a compelling argument here?

im not disputing that we have a young list but how was that benchmark of young arrived at?

Hi dr every year the AFL post the best AFL team 22 and younger so I guess they have set the bench mark for what is considered young players.😁

To try to be positive 

Petty started to take some marks and worked up the ground 

Viney and Rivers were impressive 

I thought Salem had a good game

Steven May lead from the front and deserves an award perhaps an academy award

The Kolt showed enough and a goal assist to ANB showed he knows his limitations 

we converted our opportunities 

kangas may be on the bottom but they have some cattle which is reaching critical mass

we are missing Lever Petracca and more

coming off a bye maybe we were “loading” for better performances in future games beyond kangas

still I think Oliver consistently let his emotions disadvantage the team with downfield hits and penalties and being tagged is not an excuse 

Edited June 24, 20241 yr by dino rover

I can only name 9 22 and under, Kozzie turned 23.

Kolt
Brown
Rooter
Bowey
McVee
Howes
Windsor
Rivs
Disco

Who is the 10th?

1 hour ago, dino rover said:

Why was 22 chosen as the benchmark?

would the result differ much at 21 or 23 24 25 or is 22 the best for a compelling argument here?

im not disputing that we have a young list but how was that benchmark of young arrived at?

i presume cos it means that they have, generally speaking, less than 4 years worth of experience

koz must've been included cos he turned 23 the other week

Mmm then why “less than 4 years of experience”? It’s an arbitrary mark.

2 hours ago, Gorgoroth said:

I can only name 9 22 and under, Kozzie turned 23.

Kolt
Brown
Rooter
Bowey
McVee
Howes
Windsor
Rivs
Disco

Who is the 10th?

Is Rooter JVR?

10 minutes ago, Bombay Airconditioning said:

Is Rooter JVR?

Yeah 😁

Sorry it's a name we use in a group I'm in and I'm just use to writing that 🤣

Just now, Gorgoroth said:

Yeah 😁

Sorry it's a name we use in a group I'm in and I'm just use to writing that 🤣

All good, I’m on holiday and I’ve had a couple so just thought I’d clarify.

4 hours ago, Gorgoroth said:

I can only name 9 22 and under, Kozzie turned 23.

Kolt
Brown
Rooter
Bowey
McVee
Howes
Windsor
Rivs
Disco

Who is the 10th?

Could it be that the criterion is the age as at the start of the season?

 

1 hour ago, Chelly said:

Could it be that the criterion is the age as at the start of the season?

No the tweet to says for the round