Bitter but optimistic

You're not another bloody lawyer are you?

There's always room for one more in the swamp dpos.

I reckon Middle sex might be worse ( or better?) dc.

A fashion oversight for sure

Bah! The gown was a disappointment - no cleavage and too loose to show arse contours. Back to the footy for me.

I'm getting very excited!!!

I'm trying to read Demonland and watch The Wedding simultaneously - but I'm torn. The Lads are watching too and have promised to alert me when the bride arrives.

Bah! Vulgar doggerel which, unsurprisingly receives likes from a bloke who displays his underwear and a known pervert from Westralia.

You're a [censored] sicko Deemented.

Well good evening folks. Your good old Uncle Bitter has been very busy of late and thus neglected my faithful readership. Questions without notice for picket fence. Did you attend the recent man cave exhibition? If so, was it a life changing experience for you? To curious matters. Did anyone notice that today's Herald Sin was offering Megan face masks? I thought it a splendid idea and have obtained a number of the said items. I intend having the maid wear them during her ..... err ... extra curricula activities at The Manor. Oh and a PS to Ernie. For a person in a state of deceasedness you are becoming painfully sanctimonious. You're dead Ernie - live it up!

Been busy of late so I've just caught up with this thread. I must say, I believe that it is the only time in my life that thoughts of Justin Bieber have come to my mind.

Well I handed out a rather artistic flogging and received a rousing round of applause from the members.

Well clearly skinny, she needs a jolly good thrashing.

Rising again can be a problematic issue dc

Well I must say it's delightful to hear from the canuck correspondent. Both you and dc made quite reasonable suppositions about the said property, however, the truth of the matter is that Biffen was rejected as a potential occupant on the basis of his poor character and record of appalling behaviour in that area. And yes Mabel ...... I did survive Asia .... just .... but have barely survived recent encounters with Biffen. My financial health is particularly damaged.

Now on another matter. Even during my relatively short viewing of tv, I have been assailed by a flood of adds for a program called "married at first sight". Unless I have been overcome by shiraz and passed out, I don't believe I have ever watched a so called "reality" show. Do any of you fellow interlectuals watch this stuff? Could someone tell me who does? Am I making a harsh judgement based on little evidence in saying this stuff is rubbish? I just get the impression that it must be some sort of black hole that sucks out whatever brain cells remain. This whole concept of "reality" tv befuddles me. Perhaps I am totally out of touch with the world - a strong possibility I'll admit. Please enlighten me.

I'm pleased to hear the local pinot is a success this year. Sadly OD, I lack your contacts and am unable to guzzle it freely.

Bloody hell OD!! You must be hammering that single malt if you are resurrecting posts from 7 years back!

You are clearly a man of refined taste Col - a cut above the riff and raff with whom I appear to be increasingly surrounded. However, if I may be so bold as to one make one correction to your above epistle. Surely you meant to say " those who cast nasturtiums on you"?

Exactly! I fear my wit is wasted. Speaking of witch, I have noted that the immoderator vandals have been heavy handed with the red pencil to some of my recent most eloquent posts.

I'm back and now refreshed. Although I note that this interlectual thread has been sadly neglected in my absence. I did have to take have a few days rest after my sojourn to the colonial outposts. (Being fawned over for a week can be very arduous - even for one who is accustomed to flattery) I had little success in avoiding Biffen unfortunately. Though I must say he has a surprising and extensive network of contacts over there. Albeit among the drunken and drug addicted class. As I understand it, he is currently working his way through rural villages buying antiquities and funerary artefacts from the poor and ignorant. He makes the British Museum look like a philanthropic organisation. I have also noted some irregularities on my credit card statement and, as I had Biffen conduct a financial transaction for me, I fear he may have "Sylvia'd" me !

[censored] me !! Book reviews!! What is Demonland becoming ?

Just taking a break from spreading good will in the Far East colonies chanced upon biffen yesterday - he was drunk of course and invited uncle to a luncheon It was a surprisingly decent tavern and despite being surrounded by his shady associates and a poor choice of wine the tucker was rather good come bill paying time Biffen fell for the old chestnut that I'd left my wallet in my room safe bwahaha! One to uncle bitter!

Bah! As if I would share my Tanqueray Dry with one of your vulgar palate.

I shall think of you Ethan. I'm also into spooning.