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Behind closed doors

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Posted

I have been a demonland member for several years with modest involvement. I don't mind the regular argy bargy, although uncomfortable with the disrespect shone to some on our player list by overly emotional fans. However I encountered my first experience of a personal email recently. It looked good until I found someone had responded to a rather mid-range comment I had made in the flow of someones thread, but a comment that apparently had stood on someones toes. In trying to explain my comment the initiator moved from passive aggression, to open aggression to downright abuse. I've understood the forum to be a bit of fun for supporters of the club, and yes we are passionate so it has a therapeutic purpose. I imagine some have perhaps struck up some friendships. But it took me by surprise to discover someone could use the extra option of personally engaging with someone 'behind the closed door' of a personal email in a most unsavoury way. Does this happen regularly or did I just cop a bad apple in our midst?

 

I have been a demonland member for several years with modest involvement. I don't mind the regular argy bargy, although uncomfortable with the disrespect shone to some on our player list by overly emotional fans. However I encountered my first experience of a personal email recently. It looked good until I found someone had responded to a rather mid-range comment I had made in the flow of someones thread, but a comment that apparently had stood on someones toes. In trying to explain my comment the initiator moved from passive aggression, to open aggression to downright abuse. I've understood the forum to be a bit of fun for supporters of the club, and yes we are passionate so it has a therapeutic purpose. I imagine some have perhaps struck up some friendships. But it took me by surprise to discover someone could use the extra option of personally engaging with someone 'behind the closed door' of a personal email in a most unsavoury way. Does this happen regularly or did I just cop a bad apple in our midst?

You can block PMs from particular posters.

And in every society there are all types of people.

Why I have even rolled my eyes at posts of yours, hr...

I think it's fairly rare, but it does happen every now and then.

At least, I've experienced it a few times.

Sometimes passions run high.

I usually just give as good as I receive and leave it there.

I think after a little bit of time passes, those that originally engaged you realise they went overboard.

Don't expect any apologies though.

 

I have been a demonland member for several years with modest involvement. I don't mind the regular argy bargy, although uncomfortable with the disrespect shone to some on our player list by overly emotional fans. However I encountered my first experience of a personal email recently. It looked good until I found someone had responded to a rather mid-range comment I had made in the flow of someones thread, but a comment that apparently had stood on someones toes. In trying to explain my comment the initiator moved from passive aggression, to open aggression to downright abuse. I've understood the forum to be a bit of fun for supporters of the club, and yes we are passionate so it has a therapeutic purpose. I imagine some have perhaps struck up some friendships. But it took me by surprise to discover someone could use the extra option of personally engaging with someone 'behind the closed door' of a personal email in a most unsavoury way. Does this happen regularly or did I just cop a bad apple in our midst?

I havnt encountered such behavior myself, and am disappointed reading this HR...... my understanding was that this is a forum and if you have something to say then say it to everyone, unless it is personal communication of non-threatening variety.

And i would assume also that the demonland code of conduct would still apply, to this person if need be

And i would assume also that the demonland code of conduct would still apply, to this person if need be

Yes.

PM a mod if there are private messaging conversations that offend.

No-one has the right to denigrate in private any more than public.


Yeah, just PM a mod and get the moron banned or suspended. That sort of stuff is not on... just cause someone doesn't agree with your OPINION doesn't mean they have the right to berate you for it.

I have been a demonland member for several years with modest involvement. I don't mind the regular argy bargy, although uncomfortable with the disrespect shone to some on our player list by overly emotional fans. However I encountered my first experience of a personal email recently. It looked good until I found someone had responded to a rather mid-range comment I had made in the flow of someones thread, but a comment that apparently had stood on someones toes. In trying to explain my comment the initiator moved from passive aggression, to open aggression to downright abuse. I've understood the forum to be a bit of fun for supporters of the club, and yes we are passionate so it has a therapeutic purpose. I imagine some have perhaps struck up some friendships. But it took me by surprise to discover someone could use the extra option of personally engaging with someone 'behind the closed door' of a personal email in a most unsavoury way. Does this happen regularly or did I just cop a bad apple in our midst?

Set them on Fire H. That kind of interaction is not on.

I've only had a few in the last couple of years. One was downright threatening, so much so that there's a slim possibility it was 'tongue in cheek' ......... but why would anyone bother sending a threatening 'tongue in cheek' PM? I briefly contemplated reporting it, but ended up laughing it off.

 

I've only had a few in the last couple of years. One was downright threatening, so much so that there's a slim possibility it was 'tongue in cheek' ......... but why would anyone bother sending a threatening 'tongue in cheek' PM? I briefly contemplated reporting it, but ended up laughing it off.

Definitely let one of the mods know if something like this occurs.


  • Author

You can block PMs from particular posters.

And in every society there are all types of people.

Why I have even rolled my eyes at posts of yours, hr...

have I personally attacked you, if so identify it and I will apologise

  • Author

What is this thread doing in the football forum?

The ethos of the forum community is important to its purpose. This way I can leave the person's monica out of it, and I certainly have not intention of reporting it to the Mods. Just interested in an unanticipated experience amongst fellow supporters.

Edited by Harrisonrules

The ethos of the forum community is important to its purpose. This way I can leave the person's monica out of it, and I certainly have not intention of reporting it to the Mods. Just interested in an unanticipated experience amongst fellow supporters.

Sure thing, I just thought the "general" section would be more appropriate, given that nobody is discussing the MFC in this thread.

Incidentally , I have received many PMs of that nature. Given that I am probably the most maligned figure on this website that is hardly surprising. For the most part I find them amusing.

have I personally attacked you, if so identify it and I will apologise

?

I don't think that's what rpfc was getting at, at all.

Fwiw, I think it's worth just forgetting and moving on from.

I don't look particularly kind on those either those sending abusive PMs or those whinging about it incessantly.

Not that I'm the arbiter of all that is good and bad on this forum.

Although I do think it's about time this thread was closed........................

Given that I am probably the most maligned figure on this website that is hardly surprising. For the most part I find them amusing.

What? That's a ronoesque comment if ever I've heard one. You blow in once every six months when the opportunity presents itself to grind your political axe. You're barely even a visible figure on this website, let alone being close to the most maligned.

Shame really, because I think you have a lot to offer this forum, but you choose to only turn up when you need to sink a slipper in to the club's administration.


Actually after some heated debate in public with ADC regarding Tom Scully , I had one or two private messages with him and it actually took a lot of tension out of the debate. We dont agree at all on that subject but the private messages I think helped.

I still think you are a looney ADC ( tongue in cheek emoticon)

What? That's a ronoesque comment if ever I've heard one. You blow in once every six months when the opportunity presents itself to grind your political axe. You're barely even a visible figure on this website, let alone being close to the most maligned.

Shame really, because I think you have a lot to offer this forum, but you choose to only turn up when you need to sink a slipper in to the club's administration.

You have just proven my point more eloquently than I could ever hope to.

Still no mention of the MFC in here.

Sure thing, I just thought the "general" section would be more appropriate, given that nobody is discussing the MFC in this thread.

Incidentally , I have received many PMs of that nature. Given that I am probably the most maligned figure on this website that is hardly surprising. For the most part I find them amusing.

You have also given a few PMs on your occasional visits...

And you would have to be a bit more relevant and prolific to be maligned on this site...

This is the big league.

Perform or move on.

I understand it's a tough gig, but people have a right to be critical. If you don't do your job, you are taking up someone else's place. We have a right to be critical seeing as though we invest time, money and emotion.

You have also given a few PMs on your occasional visits...

And you would have to be a bit more relevant and prolific to be maligned on this site...

And I might be a bit more prolific if I wasn't so maligned.

Speaking of relevance, you'll find more of it in my post than yours.


have I personally attacked you, if so identify it and I will apologise

You misread my post.

I was implying that I have disagreed with you in the past without the need to PM you.

I was also intimating that every society, of which Land is a microcosm, will have some, let's say, aggressive individuals who feel the need to bully/harass those that disagree with them.

And if it gets to a point that is uncomfortable - you can block them from 'PMing' you.

What? That's a ronoesque comment if ever I've heard one. You blow in once every six months when the opportunity presents itself to grind your political axe. You're barely even a visible figure on this website, let alone being close to the most maligned.

Shame really, because I think you have a lot to offer this forum, but you choose to only turn up when you need to sink a slipper in to the club's administration.

My sentiments exactly Nasher, well worded.

And I might be a bit more prolific if I wasn't so maligned.

Chicken and the egg.

You have a clear agenda.

You have some great points.

You are never around to discuss anything unless it is about the previous board, or problems with the current board.

Speaking of relevance, you'll find more of it in my post than yours.

That's rich coming from a poster whose relevance revolves around two topics.

Which makes me wonder why you are even posting in a thread such as this?

Are you ingratiating yourself?

We are a friendly bunch of people - why even BB59, who has had some disagreements with me in the past, thinks of rpfc as a lifelong friend and confidant.

 

I realise that my off the cuff remark about being maligned is what slead to this thread going off the rails but if you guys want to talk about me can we please not hijack someone else's thread to do it?


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