The No T$ No B$ Thread

[special robert 438]

45 minutes ago, Earl Hood said:

Moons please I do not live in the burbs as that is how I regard Fitzroy North! I am Fitzroy central please and no I will not be lodging Special. As I have said elsewhere  living under a bridge is luxurious compared to my former circumstances growing up in a shoebox. Hardship can be character building and I am a shining example of  what it can produce, even if I say so myself. I do thank Special for living away out of sight, under a bridge, that is preferable to the ferals sleeping out at Flinders Street Station. Very untidy, and it upsets Robert Doyle so much. But don't bring your bedding to Fitzroy by the way. We have a zero tolerance rule here, Robert. 

Earl I used to beg outside the Smith St Safeway but it got very crowded....too many other bloody beggers....you know you'd be having a bong and they would want some....stuff like that! 

[daisycutter 29,622]

26 minutes ago, special robert said:

Oh I got it.....Bonham  ...John..... Awesome drummer.....my fav is Moby Dick   I get it so Biffen is a dick.

brilliant, special. now back on the medication before it's too late.......

[Earl Hood 6,086]

48 minutes ago, special robert said:

Earl I used to beg outside the Smith St Safeway but it got very crowded....too many other bloody beggers....you know you'd be having a bong and they would want some....stuff like that! 

I suspect the local indigenous tribe might have sent you on your way, that is very much their territory. They know they were dudded by J Batman, then Pascoe Fawkner so they would be very wary of another whitey intruding on their space, especially one who lives under a bridge! 

[dieter 3,325]

12 hours ago, special robert said:

Wow....does this mean i'm finally avante garde? Wait till I tell Biffen......he's a bohemian intellectual and I want to be like him.

I doubt very much that he is from Bohemia.

[Wrecker45 3,378]

15 hours ago, special robert said:

This having separate sex 'walk' symbols in the city will never work. Today I just ignored the female walk sign and crossed anyway. Nobody said anything.

 

I'll be doing the same when I come across them.

A bit like how I don't stop at traffic lights if I lived in or spent a lot of time in the suburb before they were there. It hasn't failed me yet.

[Biffen 12,944]

Special Robert,

There is more to joining the bohemian fraternity than wearing stained and dirty clothes .

One must be aiming at a certain libertine spirit to accompany the slightly worn and weathered attire And coiffure of the decadant and edgy  set. 

I'm concerned you may never attain this radical mindset Special,not because you are not Avante Garde enough,you clearly have that in spades,as your recent situational traffic light art attests.

The reason you may be shunned from bohemian society is related more to your prefèrence for bourbon and bongs over free wine and canapés ,usually purchased by wealthy benefactors known as art dealers.

Nobody in their right mind is going to allow you to enter their art gallery SR. Your best hope might be to run as a Greens candidate at the next election and just be happy living under the bridge or even the very nice doorways at St Paul's.

[special robert 438]

14 minutes ago, Biffen said:

Special Robert,

There is more to joining the bohemian fraternity than wearing stained and dirty clothes .

One must be aiming at a certain libertine spirit to accompany the slightly worn and weathered attire And coiffure of the decadant and edgy  set. 

I'm concerned you may never attain this radical mindset Special,not because you are not Avante Garde enough,you clearly have that in spades,as your recent situational traffic light art attests.

The reason you may be shunned from bohemian society is related more to your prefèrence for bourbon and bongs over free wine and canapés ,usually purchased by wealthy benefactors known as art dealers.

Nobody in their right mind is going to allow you to enter their art gallery SR. Your best hope might be to run as a Greens candidate at the next election and just be happy living under the bridge or even the very nice doorways at St Paul's.

Biff..are you still in Mandalay? I could learn you know. ....you could be Mr Higgins and me Eliza......can you sing? I know all the words to 'wouldn't it be loverly'. You could take me to Fitzroy to rub shoulders with the toffs. Is BBO a lord or something? How come he has a manor and servants?

[Biffen 12,944]

1 hour ago, special robert said:

Biff..are you still in Mandalay? I could learn you know. ....you could be Mr Higgins and me Eliza......can you sing? I know all the words to 'wouldn't it be loverly'. You could take me to Fitzroy to rub shoulders with the toffs. Is BBO a lord or something? How come he has a manor and servants?

Robert Im not willing or interested in educating you to become a socially acceptable member of society.

I might be able to set you up with a bucket and a squeegee so you can help clean motorists windows at the traffic lights.

I will give you a 3 week trial without pay and a sealed box to put my money in.I suggest you jump at this wonderful employment opportunity.

[Earl Hood 6,086]

1 hour ago, Biffen said:

Robert Im not willing or interested in educating you to become a socially acceptable member of society.

I might be able to set you up with a bucket and a squeegee so you can help clean motorists windows at the traffic lights.

I will give you a 3 week trial without pay and a sealed box to put my money in.I suggest you jump at this wonderful employment opportunity.

Biff I would prefer we put Robert to a more constructive task cleaning the graffiti around Fitzroy! It should keep him busy for some time and he could sleep in Edinburgh Park at night with the possums, better than a bridge I would think.

[daisycutter 29,622]

Just now, Earl Hood said:

Biff I would prefer we put Robert to a more constructive task cleaning the graffiti around Fitzroy! It should keep him busy for some time and he could sleep in Edinburgh Park at night with the possums, better than a bridge I would think.

earl, you just can't remove the graffiti from fitzroy. quite apart from the fact it represents the only indication of culture (albeit of the lesser variety) in fitzroy, but i fear if you remove the graffiti being the only binding matter holding the suburb together, the whole place will simply tumble down

[Maple Demon 449]

On Thursday, January 19, 2017 at 9:26 AM, Moonshadow said:

Back from your visit to see the relos in Cameroonia, Maple?

Was just checking in on the important news while I was there.

[Maple Demon 449]

6 hours ago, special robert said:

Biff..are you still in Mandalay? I could learn you know. ....you could be Mr Higgins and me Eliza......can you sing? I know all the words to 'wouldn't it be loverly'. You could take me to Fitzroy to rub shoulders with the toffs. Is BBO a lord or something? How come he has a manor and servants?

BBO has attained a unique level in society, Robert.  I'm afraid that he is very selective about whose shoulders he rubs.

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

3 hours ago, Maple Demon said:

BBO has attained a unique level in society, Robert.  I'm afraid that he is very selective about whose shoulders he rubs.

Couldn't have put it better myself Mable.

[Moonshadow 17,676]

On Thursday, March 09, 2017 at 8:05 PM, Maple Demon said:

BBO has attained a unique level in society, Robert.  I'm afraid that he is very selective about whose shoulders he rubs.

I've met the man (and I use that term very loosly, such was my confusion), so have Biffen and your fine self Maple. Can't be that picky. Matter of fact, I'd go so far as to say he was able to hold his head just a little bit higher in our company. 

[hemingway 7,628]

Who is Special Robert ?           Special Robert has a special complex or disorder best off ignoring.  Seek treatment Special Robert.  The other Special folks on this thread who don't call themselves Special although they may think they are, are either on treatment, not on treatment or so far off the spectrum they defy diagnosis. Like other special folks in the community they exist because they have special people that accept them.  But Special Robert the worst thing you can do is ingratiate yourself in the hope that you will be able to befriend them. They are very contrary and can turn on you in a second. Beware!  

[special robert 438]

On 3/9/2017 at 3:55 PM, Biffen said:

Robert Im not willing or interested in educating you to become a socially acceptable member of society.

I might be able to set you up with a bucket and a squeegee so you can help clean motorists windows at the traffic lights.

I will give you a 3 week trial without pay and a sealed box to put my money in.I suggest you jump at this wonderful employment opportunity.

I would like to give it a go but I think you're trying to rip me off. I checked at Bunnings..I can get a plastic bucket for $2.50 and at Coles a packet of 3 select brand heavy duty scourer sponges is only $3.

My mate Dingo reckons I can get 20c for each car (he gets a dollar but he's done it for a while.) So I think I could do about 2 or 3 cars and hour so over say 10 hrs ......................  .I would be ............I mean you would be .....making about say $6 a day...not bad. You would be getting a 100% return on your investment on the first day!

Multiply that by 3 weeks and we are looking at quite a haul. Dingo also reckons that making me do a 3 week unpaid trial sucks. Dingos mate Squirrel has also offered to help by looking after my bong and the sealed box.

 

[special robert 438]

2 hours ago, hemingway said:

Who is Special Robert ?           Special Robert has a special complex or disorder best off ignoring.  Seek treatment Special Robert.  The other Special folks on this thread who don't call themselves Special although they may think they are, are either on treatment, not on treatment or so far off the spectrum they defy diagnosis. Like other special folks in the community they exist because they have special people that accept them.  But Special Robert the worst thing you can do is ingratiate yourself in the hope that you will be able to befriend them. They are very contrary and can turn on you in a second. Beware!  

Thanks for the heads up Hemingway ...but Squirrel reckons I've got Biffen right where I want him.

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

9 hours ago, hemingway said:

Who is Special Robert ?           Special Robert has a special complex or disorder best off ignoring.  Seek treatment Special Robert.  The other Special folks on this thread who don't call themselves Special although they may think they are, are either on treatment, not on treatment or so far off the spectrum they defy diagnosis. Like other special folks in the community they exist because they have special people that accept them.  But Special Robert the worst thing you can do is ingratiate yourself in the hope that you will be able to befriend them. They are very contrary and can turn on you in a second. Beware!  

Now listen here Ernie! Just because you're dead and Special's alive is no reason to be cruel to him and try to dash his social climbing aspirations.

He's poor and lives under a road FFS!  Knocking back Biffen's generous offer shows that he's unwilling to work so he needs to ingratiate himself.

 

PS Special! Handing over some of those laptops you filch off lawyers would be  wonderfully ingratiating.

PPS. I'd especially like a peek at Redleg's.

[Biffen 12,944]

Special,

Unless Squirrel and Dingo are acclaimed business consultants then I should think you will learn lots more working for me.

Nobody can give you a firm grounding in capitalism and the vagaries of market forces than I SR.

My 3 week trial gives you a chance to really earn your stripes and will give you self respect and a sense of purpose.Squirrel and Dingo only want to steal your money so that's why Id like you to use the sealed box I'm willing to provide for free.

I'm happy to give squirrel and dingo a sealed box and a different squeegee each to join the "team".

You can be team leader Robert.

This is a Special offer!!

[Redleg 40,973]

On 3/8/2017 at 9:26 PM, special robert said:

BBo ...free wi fi in the city and we often get  a different device depending on which gentlemen of the legal fraternity stray too far down William st....and lose their way and become our prey.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

21 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

I've met the man (and I use that term very loosly, such was my confusion), so have Biffen and your fine self Maple. Can't be that picky. Matter of fact, I'd go so far as to say he was able to hold his head just a little bit higher in our company. 

I'll bet you brag about meeting Uncle Bitter while sipping your inner city, no MSG  fair trade lattes Moon.

In fact, you probably get a freebie out of it.

[Moonshadow 17,676]

12 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

I'll bet you brag about meeting Uncle Bitter while sipping your inner city, no MSG  fair trade lattes Moon.

In fact, you probably get a freebie out of it.

No, I'd get no service if I mentioned Uncle Bitter. My morning deconstructed soy latte with a caramel twist is way too important to risk

[Moonshadow 17,676]

You're absolutely right Biffen, white men are hard done by these days. This guy, the chairman of Tesco, claims that white men are an endangered species in current day boardrooms. He'd know, he's, um... er, a privileged white male and he's in the boardroom of a major international company, so that, er, proves it I guess...

 

Edited March 11, 2017 by Moonshadow

[Guest]

Wow.

I thought Biffen would always be recognized as the most seedy and morally compromised yet endearingly (?) eccentric member of 'land but this Special Robert bloke is almost lobbying for a role as his Sith apprentice. This is the most entertainment I have had for quite some time.

 

[Biffen 12,944]

9 hours ago, Moonshadow said:

You're absolutely right Biffen, white men are hard done by these days. This guy, the chairman of Tesco, claims that white men are an endangered species in current day boardrooms. He'd know, he's, um... er, a privileged white male and he's in the boardroom of a major international company, so that, er, proves it I guess...

 

I'd sack him and give the job to a woman.Preferably of colour.

Men shouldn't be in supermarkets anyway.They should be killing buffalo or hunting whales,like real men.