Biffen

In other important news, my skid marks are a darker shade of brown during the heatwave.

Same-but I took em all. In the words of Mitch Hedberg..... I used to take a lot of drugs. Still do but I used to also.

I'm never wrong.Even when I'm wrong.

Jerome is his name.Bass player.

One of the Expensive Winos lives in Ringwood !! or did at least. What a great gig for him.

Top album. Shouldn't take it so hard is a killer.

Donvales greatest son. Doesn't say much for Donvale.

It takes time to get over the death of your father. It's an important stage of life . He's not up to the challenge yet so let him be.

You sound like s sports administrator.

Sporting administrators are the lowest form of human life on the planet ,particularly in Australia ,as sport is seen to be important here. Go to your local bowling or cricket club if you don't believe me. I have nearly zero respect for the off-field participants in our club. We win in spite of them and mostly we lose because of them. They are purely handicappers. They are not worth the steam. Every win we get is a slap in the face to them. They should really work for nothing, or just go home. The players know who can play. The hangers on are wasting everyones money and more importantly their time. Time is the only commodity worth worrying about and we have wasted so much of it.

BBO is organising the lighting of the flame. Apparently it involve a schoolgirls underwear purchased from a vending machine. He has been been travelling around Tokyo in ladies clothes on the train system. "Just trying to get a feel of the place" according to his postcard.

When I think of an injured calf I think of Veal scallopini. It's a cruel world.

We've blackballed him from The Melbourne Club . Standards.

I'll bring my Smug spray.

Totes

We are like Michael Diamond in the foot shooting category. We never miss.

Stephen Powell?

Thanks for the feedback. Biffen Industries values your opinion greatly and wishes to direct any unwanted suggestions to our Complaints officer Helen Waite. Please go to Helen Waite.

Not Quite Right and The Reject Shop might be suitable.

Aubrey Plaza naked in my boudoir with a rose between her teeth.

I'm expecting him to be an absolute dud who can barely scrape a game in the twos for the first three years. Once we've traded him to the Blues , along with a first round pick who goes on to be the next Dustin Martin ,we will watch him dominate the competition and applaud ourselves for our ability to develop raw talent. In return we'll get a brat with two [censored] knees and a drug problem, a chronic drunk and some geriatric has been.

Prince Phillip and I share a love a multicultural festivals. I am informed he caused quite an uproar when he requested the American perform a twerk for his entertainment.Despite the offer of a tenner.

My dog has a lump on his balls usually in odd years.Then he chews on his sack and it disappears for about 12 months then re-appears about 12 months later (in an odd year). I've noticed the MFC is following a fairly similar trajectory if you take into account 1964,1988,2000 and 2016. I think the club should employ my dog as an advisor.

Lewis is now in the role he should have been in last year.

That shouldn't damage the budget too much after you've processed the payments to her "management" and made the conversion back in to rupees. I'm sure you can chamber pot away without to much damage to the manors' budget. Oh the humanity!