Chook

Hawthorn are better than people think (they have to be because they beat us), and the Crows are worse than people think (they have to be because we smashed them).

Your wish is my command. Excuse the analogue quality. I'm not Fox.

OHH BOO HOO HOW DID WE LOSE TO THIS HAWTHORN SIDE THEY'RE OBVIOUSLY PATHETIC 24/7!!!

Glad to see Stretchy back in. I thought it was a mistake when he was dropped...but then we started winning a whole bunch, so I guess the moral of the story is that the football department knows what its doing.

Some countries go to the moon. We watch sports. It's our thing.

If Trengove plays AFL (which he deserves on form) and fails, we get resolution that a former captain is not up to it. If any other player plays and doesn't perform, they'll still have another chance. I reckon the closure we'll get if Trengove gets a chance and fails is worth the risk that he comes in and doesn't perform.

This bloke is low-key one of our most important players. I'm talking Max Gawn levels of importance here.

I can see 1:05 happening again this week.

Jordie McKenzie played during that period, so...

Steady on! He hasn't even won us a premiership yet. Just cause we destroyed the dogs last week, let's not jump the gun!

So that's 1.25 votes per clanger. Now we know the formula for success!

...unprecedented.

A complement to Jack Trengove's tackling technique if ever there was one.

Thank god it's all rolled into one easy number. I don't know if I could comprehend more than one statistic in my life.

I think I heard this week that Simon Goodwin wants us to be a respectful footy club... Lucky that doesn't apply to supporters.

I would, but he's just not a good footy player.

I'll just leave this here.

Do we thank Neeldy for Pedersen though? #Pedoqueries

The Enemy (applies to everyone, all the time, whatever the circumstance).

Sam Frost is a ridiculous physical specimen. Surely he's wasted in the AFL. He should be winning gold medals in Sport X (whatever he's best suited to).

I think clubs just underestimated the effect of the bye + week off for the winners of the QF. This year I expect things will go back to normal. A week off is massive. Two weeks off at the end of a long hard season is even better if managed right. It would make or break us as a young team that will probably struggle to run out the year, let alone any finals we might have.

JKH, Weiderman, Wagner, Trengove. On this metric, we're probably at least 3-4 players off premiership contention then...

JACK WATTS (incredulously): "It's enjoyable playing footy after all these years."

I love you Jack Watts! Massive goal after the Dogs responded.

I tell you, Hannan is a nifty small forward, and we get another straight away. Loving this match. It's a shame we haven't been able to keep them goalless this half though.