Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Demonland

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

22 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

I have to say that constantly being maligned and made the butt of jokes on this thread is wearing me down.

I'll admit I like a drink a bit overmuch .... and yes , I have a triple x gut ... but I'm really quite a sensitive chap. You know .... I'm basically a  if you [censored] me do I not bleed type of fellow.

 

I'm trying to understand why the word "cut" was censored. Perhaps I don't need an answer to that.

Oh, oh, oh, I've just read your entreaty again ....... are you Andrew O'Keefe? Not sure about the triple x gut but that could be to put everyone off the trail. He is of Irish descent but I'm not sure if he owns a Kaftan or three.

 
3 hours ago, WalkingCivilWar said:

I’ve never seen this, Daise. So I Google imaged it and found a better version of it…

5F50E84E-CF89-483A-A33A-A3E592E9F9F2.thumb.jpeg.74ceb94ab014ad4aced1aa70968d16b3.jpeg

😁

I tried dr google too, and this is what i got.....

Head Swollen GIF - Head Swollen - Discover & Share GIFs

21 minutes ago, dworship said:

I'm trying to understand why the word "cut" was censored. Perhaps I don't need an answer to that.

Oh, oh, oh, I've just read your entreaty again ....... are you Andrew O'Keefe? Not sure about the triple x gut but that could be to put everyone off the trail. He is of Irish descent but I'm not sure if he owns a Kaftan or three.

The quote I was referencing is from The Merchant of Venice . " if you [censored] us do we not bleed"

Edit. Even The Bard gets barred by the immoderators !

Edited by Bitter but optimistic

 
22 hours ago, WalkingCivilWar said:

Protection from Fritta that is. Everyone else thought it was funny, especially his parents. Fritta, not so much. He seemed most unimpressed. 

That might have been because you were sleeping in his room. What did Vonnie think, about the plush toy, not the sleeping in his room part.

Edited by dworship

6 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

The quote I was referencing is from The Merchant of Venice . " if you [censored] us do we not bleed"

 

Most edifying, I'm starting to think you are being maligned unjustly. A man of culture who refuses to misspell the work of Shakespeare in order to circumvent the censorship rules.


  • Author
3 hours ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

Congratulations Red for authoring the most vomit inducing post I've ever seen on Demonland.!

I am always happy to be announced as the best at something and this is another accolade for my scrap book. I am overwhelmed.

I would like to thank all those who have helped me along the way.

  • Author
2 hours ago, hemingway said:

Red would love Mary Poppins !

Who told you? That was only mentioned to my psychiatrist in a session.

  • Author
2 hours ago, hemingway said:

As you know Uncle, I’m not a well man. 

You are not alone on this thread.

 
  • Author
1 hour ago, dworship said:

You could always do a "Lawyer X"

What and hide in Uncle Bitter’s manor for the rest of my life?

  • Author
1 hour ago, Neil Crompton said:

Hang on. BBO is really my uncle?

Only by 🩸 blood. But we can keep the secret if you want.


  • Author
42 minutes ago, Bitter but optimistic said:

The quote I was referencing is from The Merchant of Venice . " 

Wasn’t he a used gondola salesman?

  • Author
26 minutes ago, dworship said:

Most edifying, I'm starting to think you are being maligned unjustly. 

No one unjustly maligns Uncle Bitter on here.

42 minutes ago, dworship said:

That might have been because you were sleeping in his room. What did Vonnie think, about the plush toy, not the sleeping in his room part.

I don’t know who Vonnie is. But whoever he/she is I’m sure he/she loved the mini Fritta bear because from what I saw Fritta was the only one not laughing and I think I even got a little eye roll from him. 

8 minutes ago, Redleg said:

What and hide in Uncle Bitter’s manor for the rest of my life?

Butlering is an admirable profession, if you play your cards right you might even be in charge of the maids.

  • Author
1 hour ago, dworship said:

Butlering is an admirable profession, if you play your cards right you might even be in charge of the maids.

That’s ok if you didn’t have to keep giving them money 💰 to feed the meters.


1 hour ago, Redleg said:

No one unjustly maligns Uncle Bitter on here.

Are you suggesting that any malgining of BBO is by definition just? 😆

  • Author
2 minutes ago, Red and Bluebeard said:

Are you suggesting that any malgining of BBO is by definition just? 😆

Do I have to spell it out?

Just now, Redleg said:

Do I have to spell it out?

I-T O-U-T. What is the issue? 😆

  • Author
5 minutes ago, Red and Bluebeard said:

I-T O-U-T. What is the issue? 😆

Have you been drinking Uncle Bitter’s turpentine?

Just now, Redleg said:

Have you been drinking Uncle Bitter’s turpentine?

Nah. I wouldn't clean the dunny with that stuff!


1 hour ago, Red and Bluebeard said:

Nah. I wouldn't clean the dunny with that stuff!

Eeew, I wouldn't want to clean BBO's dunny with anything.

8 hours ago, Redleg said:

Have you been drinking Uncle Bitter’s turpentine?

The Uncle prefers his with a glacé cherry topped with a tiny umbrella. What concerns me most is drinking it from a pint Guinness glass!

Rather tacky.

 
  • Author
25 minutes ago, ManDee said:

The Uncle prefers his with a glacé cherry topped with a tiny umbrella. What concerns me most is drinking it from a pint Guinness glass!

Rather tacky.

I am not sure about that, Uncle Bitter is a man’s man and he would probably drink it in a dirty and even cracked glass.

But by night at the manor you can find him with a brilliant shiraz in the finest glassware!


Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

Featured Content

  • DRAFT: The Next Generation

    It was not long after the announcement that Melbourne's former number 1 draft pick Tom Scully was departing the club following 31 games and two relatively unremarkable seasons to join expansion team, the Greater Western Giants, on a six-year contract worth about $6 million, that a parody song based on Adele's hit "Someone Like You" surfaced on social media. The artist expressed lament over Scully's departure in song, culminating in the promise, "Never mind, we'll find someone like you," although I suspect that the undertone of bitterness in this version exceeded that of the original.

      • Love
      • Thanks
      • Like
    • 9 replies
  • AFLW REPORT: Brisbane

    A steamy Springfield evening set the stage for a blockbuster top-four clash between two AFLW heavyweights. Brisbane, the bookies’ favourites, hosted Melbourne at a heaving Brighton Homes Arena, with 5,022 fans packing in—the biggest crowd for a Melbourne game this season. It was the 11th meeting between these fierce rivals, with the Dees holding a narrow 6–4 edge. But while the Lions brought the chaos and roared loudest, the Demons aren’t done yet.

      • Love
    • 5 replies
  • Welcome to Demonland: Picks 7 & 8

    The Demons have acquired two first round picks in Picks 7 & 8 in the 2025 AFL National Draft.

      • Haha
    • 535 replies
  • Farewell Clayton Oliver

    The Demons have traded 4 time Club Champion Clayton Oliver to the GWS Giants for a Future Third Rounder whilst paying a significant portion of his salary each year.

      • Sad
      • Clap
      • Like
    • 2,052 replies
  • Farewell Christian Petracca

    The Demons have traded Norm Smith Medalist Christian Petracca to the Gold Coast Suns for 3 First Round Draft Picks.

      • Shocked
      • Haha
    • 1,742 replies
  • Welcome to Demonland: Jack Steele

    In a late Trade the Demons have secured the services of St. Kilda Captain Jack Steele in a move to bolster their midfield in the absence of Christian Petracca and Clayton Oliver.

      • Haha
      • Like
    • 325 replies

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.