The No T$ No B$ Thread

[daisycutter 29,621]

Channel 9 news said 80k expected and will be the biggest game of "football" seen in australia - F M D

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

Channel 9 news said 80k expected and will be the biggest game of "football" seen in australia - F M D

Yeah, I heard that too dc - you've got to be [censored] me!

[Earl Hood 6,086]

Eagerly awaiting news of Biffen.He managed to inveigle an invite to a (at least nominally respectable ) function last night. Quite a gathering of the "socially acceptable" I believe. Good Lord, Earl Hood may even have been present.

Anyway, I expect the lure of free grog will have seduced him quite easily and I just wonder whether or not was thrown out.

BBO not sure if I saw Biffen last night. Is he an artist at all, does he wear an eyepatch, wear leather and use a walking stick? I was doing my usual Friday early evening tour of the numerous art galleries of Fitzroy and Collingwood looking for the exhibition opening nights, plenty free booze and all you have to do is look at some second rate mixed media artwork or some collage of found objects stuck on canvas and pretend you understand the deeper meaning of it all, especially if there are a few good lookers about that I can impress with my vast knowledge of the arts.

Anyway after that it was off to the Robbie Burns Hotel for the best Spanish food in town and a few more wines. Does Biffen speak Spanish perhaps? The guy with the eye patch showed up later on with an entourage of women!

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

BBO not sure if I saw Biffen last night. Is he an artist at all, does he wear an eyepatch, wear leather and use a walking stick? I was doing my usual Friday early evening tour of the numerous art galleries of Fitzroy and Collingwood looking for the exhibition opening nights, plenty free booze and all you have to do is look at some second rate mixed media artwork or some collage of found objects stuck on canvas and pretend you understand the deeper meaning of it all, especially if there are a few good lookers about that I can impress with my vast knowledge of the arts.

Anyway after that it was off to the Robbie Burns Hotel for the best Spanish food in town and a few more wines. Does Biffen speak Spanish perhaps? The guy with the eye patch showed up later on with an entourage of women!

Well I think you've covered many of Biffen's aliases EH (excuse the familiarity) so you may have crossed paths. However, Biff would have finished with fish n chips and slags at the Gat.

[Moonshadow 17,676]

BBO not sure if I saw Biffen last night. Is he an artist at all, does he wear an eyepatch, wear leather and use a walking stick? I was doing my usual Friday early evening tour of the numerous art galleries of Fitzroy and Collingwood looking for the exhibition opening nights, plenty free booze and all you have to do is look at some second rate mixed media artwork or some collage of found objects stuck on canvas and pretend you understand the deeper meaning of it all, especially if there are a few good lookers about that I can impress with my vast knowledge of the arts.

Anyway after that it was off to the Robbie Burns Hotel for the best Spanish food in town and a few more wines. Does Biffen speak Spanish perhaps? The guy with the eye patch showed up later on with an entourage of women!

Earl, I saw Biff in a drunken stupor on the footpaths of Smith St last night. His vomit would have resembled a seafood paela, so it's quite possible you saw him at the Robbie Burns earlier. I know because I had a few ales at the Tote and witnessed through the window of the front bar the public nuisance that is our Biffen. Of course, I kept my head low. I did but see him passing by, but I avoid him till the day I die.

Edited July 18, 2015 by Moonshadow

[Skuit 10,031]

Boycott is a bit of a [censored]. 'Well, I think the Australians will have to bat again if they don't make 'em follow on'

[Skuit 10,031]

*K-nob. The filter should be lifted for at least this thread. Enter at you own sensibilities.

[Skuit 10,031]

But on banana-related issues I currently have hundreds of them. They all sprouted at the same time and I'm not sure what to do with such a cache (though I can definitively state that you should never wipe up the sap with a sponge). There's only so many smoothies a man can take. Contrary to common conceptions, banana trees are actually non-regenerating plants. I'm going to send off the scraps to the elephant up the road. The question is though, should I replant?

[Ethan Tremblay 30,876]

What is this bunch of overpaid sheilas playing on our home ground tonight? It is bad enough that we let ninthmond play there but these fags ...FMD!

What a [censored] poor excuse for a game it is.

One of the teams are staying on the same level as me at the Langham. Woke me up at 2am to some very strange noises.

[Biffen 12,944]

As Frank Thring once remarked (and was quoted recently by WYL),after they removed the gaffer tape and ball gag-"What a weekend!"

We had a reunion of St Kilda pimps to kick things off on Friday evening-canapes and bubbles followed by marvellous stories of years gone bye,and former employees,clients and legal run ins of course.

Many of my former rivals have moved on to bigger and better things in the public sector,child protection and what not while I still ply an old fashioned trade in a dwindling Fitzroy street ,a shadow of her former glory ,much like myself.

After canapés we sat down to speeches delivered by Long John,Shadow Man and The Chill.

Wonderful raconteurs all with strong memories of our shenanigans,and despite missing many teeth ,they all spoke quite well and surprisingly ,though many of their staff are no longer with us,they look in robust,nearly rude good health .We retired to the Former Windsor hotel(in Windsor) for drinkies and I was engaged answering questions about how to manipulate the minds of the fairer sex till nearly dawn.First Class

Saturday Night was not so brilliant and the shine was removed further by the throngs of newly emerged Euro soccer fans gathering in Richmond ,blocking my way to the All Nations where I was meeting colleagues to discuss price fixing,market control,and other business ideas.

The food has slipped terribly there,but not nearly as badly as the clientele.

There was a Blonde hosting some sort of unimportant milestone(first deep thought perhaps),who felt it necessary to scream at full lung as each of her guests arrived.

Luckily,I was armed only with a butter knife and a roaring headache so she remained safe.Idid not make it to the galleries in Smith St as the drinks are getting more watery and cheap by the day.I put this down to the ever present Earl Hood schmoozing his way through the galleries.

If any new bohemian tries to serve my cocktail in a pickle jar I take offence-some things are too important to tinker with.

I ended the evening quite early ,was home at the Gat and into a good book (American Psycho) before too late and woke feeling refreshingly superior and haughty,with no remorse ,shame or care-much like the lady speaker of Parliament!

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

Just read Biffen's Bowdlerised version of his weekend . Rather different to my recent information! Also it was quite unnecessary to besmirch Earl Hood's freeloading.

I rarely endorse Moonshadow's trivia,however, I believe his technicolor image of Biffen in Smith Street is closer to the truth of the matter.

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

One of the teams are staying on the same level as me at the Langham. Woke me up at 2am to some very strange noises.

Come on Ethan 'fess up! You were lurking in the corridors and listening at doorways!

Now go and give yourself a jolly good flo gging!

Edited July 18, 2015 by Bitter but optimistic

[daisycutter 29,621]

But on banana-related issues I currently have hundreds of them. They all sprouted at the same time and I'm not sure what to do with such a cache (though I can definitively state that you should never wipe up the sap with a sponge). There's only so many smoothies a man can take. Contrary to common conceptions, banana trees are actually non-regenerating plants. I'm going to send off the scraps to the elephant up the road. The question is though, should I replant?

i wish i had the problem of a banana tree in the backyard....................

[Bitter but optimistic 22,242]

i wish i had the problem of a banana tree in the backyard....................

The way things are going in your part of world dc, you won't have a backyard.

[Redleg 40,963]

A win, forgot what they were.

[Skuit 10,031]

They're a bit like a banana - peel off the skin and . . . (insert comment here).

[old dee 23,799]

A win, forgot what they were.

I guess it does not pay to look a gift horse in the mouth however that game may be the perfect fit for " winning Ulgy"

A decent side would have buried both teams by ten goals.

[Earl Hood 6,086]

What can I say here I am in the cold back room at home tuning into my old television to look at not the ashes but the SBS series on Byzantium while SWMBO and several other female relatives have commandeered the main TV to watch that abomination, The Voice! Barbarians! Anyway it is a bit cold but I have a bottle of red to keep me company.

Edited July 19, 2015 by Earl Hood

[Moonshadow 17,676]

What can I say here I am in the cold back room at home tuning into my old television to look at not the ashes but the SBS series on Byzantium while SWMBO and several other female relatives have commandeered the main TV to watch that abomination, The Voice! Barbarians! Anyway it is a bit cold but I have a bottle of red to keep me company.

Grounds for divoice, I would have thought Earl.

[daisycutter 29,621]

What can I say here I am in the cold back room at home tuning into my old television to look at not the ashes but the SBS series on Byzantium while SWMBO and several other female relatives have commandeered the main TV to watch that abomination, The Voice! Barbarians! Anyway it is a bit cold but I have a bottle of red to keep me company.

just for you earl

[Biffen 12,944]

Am I to understand the Barbarians conquered the Byzantines?

[Earl Hood 6,086]

Am I to understand the Barbarians conquered the Byzantines?

Well yes but it took 1100 years to do it. But I don't think you have a feel for history some how Biff. You are referring to something else perhaps?

Edited July 19, 2015 by Earl Hood

[Biffen 12,944]

Well yes but it took 1100 years to do it. But I don't think you have a feel for history some how Biff. You are referring to something else perhaps?

I'm a student of history Earl.

Mostly specialising in The Vandals.

[Earl Hood 6,086]

I'm a student of history Earl.

Mostly specialising in The Vandals.

Oh I see. I am a big Visigoth fan myself but Belerserius stitched them up big time. Pity! I don't remember the Vandals adding much to history except trouble. But I am impressed that you are a student of history, BBO never told me about that.

[Biffen 12,944]

Oh I see. I am a big Visigoth fan myself but Belerserius stitched them up big time. Pity! I don't remember the Vandals adding much to history except trouble. But I am impressed that you are a student of history, BBO never told me about that.

Let's just say it's all in the past now.