Little Goffy

Ugh. Even regular spas accumulate a layer of white fat residue on the sides just like stewpots do if you don't clean them out right away. Knew a guy who had to drain out and scrape the sides of the AIS heated spas once a fortnight. You wouldn't think all those athletes would leave behind so much fat. I... respect the necessity of very dark humour. #ganzersyndrome

The student association motto is 'Brest is best'. Also, what is going on with the departments there? sports and exercise science - okay science and technology - yep medicine and health - mm-hmm dentistry and law - WHAT?

On the bright side... No, I can't quite find a bright side. The most positive I can be is that he might be available and fresh late in the season, OR he will call it a day and we can pick up someone in the mid-season draft or even the pre-season supplementary which runs until mid Feb. Does anyone have some clarity about the latest changes to the 'inactive list' because if Brown is out for 6 to 8 weeks we may actually be eligible to put him on the inactive list right away without him retiring, which would let us snap a SSP selection. Perhaps the junior Van Rooyen can be ours after all?

Who is Zac Sharpe and why is he getting money to do what we would and could all cheerfully do better for free?

Highlights an old point about how young players need the 'protection' of an established core to help them develop and to be effective. Many players on that list we would happily say are AFL-level, but if you forced them into match ups on the opposition's very best with no counter-balance of our stars, they would get ground down and eventually destroyed. You could put together a list of the last 22 season's Rising Star winners and it would be mind-blowing viewed from a whole-career quality perspective (except for being a little thin for tall defenders) but if you had to play them all as if it was their first couple of seasons, you wouldn't necessarily have the ultimate team right away. In fact, you could even break them badly. And just for fun: B: Mills D Talia Sheezel HB: Rich Rivers Heppell C: Daicos O'meara Deledio HF: Serong Riewoldt Stephenson F: L Taylor Hogan Ko****knee FOLL: Jackson Selwood Walsh Interchange: McGrath, Palmer, Haselby, Hannebery

It is only when I look at these current training galleries that I really grasp the inadequacy shown in the training gallery shared from 2013. Even our skinny guys have clear definition. Like our team has upgraded to high resolution.

I love Jake Lever but I'm not sure he's a good choice as captain. It's a strange paradox - one of the smartest players on our list, but has also had some of the most spectacular brain farts I've ever seen on a football field! Another factor is that his effectiveness relies a bit much on others doing their job properly. In his role there's not a lot he can do to turn things around and lift morale and intensity if we are faltering. All that said, definitely a leader and definitely a super valuable player. Our next captain is going to be a whopper of a decision. Right now just about every candidate on our list is either almost as old as Gawn or in a dedicated role and persona that isn't quite captain-ish. It could be very interesting to see what happens if Brayshaw is given a more central game-defining role rather than the game-saving role he has often been in.

Generally abbreviated to SOB, DH or FW in preference over BM.

One core player 'almost leaves' - also known as... 'stays'. One fringe player dumb enough to be caught allegedly powdering during the season. One superstar player with personal issues related to ADHD and side effects of the related medications. I mean, throw in 'one of the shortest and mildest injury lists in the competition' and it doesn't seem so bad. Certainly better than any of Richmond's premiership year pre-seasons. This train of thought made me look back. I know we don't comment at all about Oliver's personal situation but my memory has been jogged; Lance Franklin, a player almost as good as Oliver, took indefinite leave from playing right at the start of the 2015 finals series citing mental health issues overwhelming him. Always worth remembering that these things happen and that players do recover and return to their absolute best. Franklin played every game and kicked 81 goals in 2016. Oliver, still just 26, remains on target for the ultimate records of most disposals, most tackles and most clearances in the history of the game. I plan to celebrate every Oliver milestone a little more knowing that he has had to get past some obstacles on the way.

Very exciting young player. Does the things expected of a key forward as far as kicking goals with good accuracy, taking marks in contests and on leads, and turning up to contest after contest. For all that, my favourite feature is his pressure efforts and pursuit of the ball and opponent even when it is going in the wrong direction. That's what made tom McDonald particularly valuable at his peak as a forward and it is great to now see a 20 year old embrace that part of the game so completely.

Of course, the whole thing of 'player x needs to put on a few kegs' is actually a bit of a red herring. With the caveat that clearly you don't want unseasoned light bodies being thrown into the constant impacts and wrestling of clearance work or rucking. Tom Hawkins was a huge beast at 18, but took just as long to develop into an effective forward as any other. Aaron Naughton was 194cm and 84kg and was taking contested marks from day dot. Jye Amiss is outright skinny but kicked 40 goals as Fremantle's only full-time forward in 2023, and clunked more contested marks than Steven May in that time. Looking at recent rising stars; Nick Daicos won it at 184cm and about 75kg weght, which was 5cm taller but 10kg lighter than Serong, while Harry Sheezel basically split the difference between the two. So, yep, unless we're talking about a kid who nobody has seen play and who is so lightly built it is immediately obvious anyway, I'm not sure there's a lot of value to having weight in the big ol' spreadsheet. Anyway, while it seems like a pretty trivial thing to feel a need to do away with at the professional level, I can see the argument for not publishing weights at the non-professional and junior levels because weight is a leverage point for all kinds of social [censored][censored]-ery that has nothing to do with the game and we can't expect every person participating in Australian football to set aside all other social considerations!

Not once! I was going to make a joke about 'and these days they don't even have to deal with polio' but then I realised that the sulky tantrum crowd of modern day punters would have kept both polio and smallpox nicely incubated for a fresh appearance generation after generation, so... Here's the to 'That'll do, let's get on with it' attitude of the low-resolution era. 🥂 Personally I'd rather pay for a schnitzel at the pub than hand money over to Murdoch anyway! Once you remove free-to-air games, games attended in person, and games I couldn't watch anyway because things are going on, it works out about the same.

Any FIFO business that might be affecting it or if it just plain old 'to get here everything has to cross the Wastelands of AwfulDoom and battle the three wardens of Shmargenrock' cost problem?

Don't forget the 1.3 for Tim English.

So, how much would it cost to arrange a return charter flight in a light aircraft every second week during the season and a few extras during pre-season? Call it 20 return flights a year, at $10k per round trip. Probably get a discount for regular business. Bonus points we can collect the Tholstrups first and refuel at Wudinna on the way. Actually, it would probably work out cheaper for the club to just fork out $2m and buy ourselves a Cessna Grand Caravan and have a contracted pilot. Throw in a bit of fun with taking people on tours for the NT games, and we can even offer pilot's licence courses as a bonus for players and staff, we're golden. Would we be able to recoup the half million a year financing and operating costs? Um... maybe? I suggest we should name it the Petty Wagon.

The only solution is a series of 'hot or not' fan votes on the AFL website.

How would you feel if your scales just said [inappropriate]?

What's the bet Richmond will bid on him just for a laugh?

There's a man who has successfully graduated from the Nathan Jones Academy of Gradually Being Better Looking As You Age. If he is able to give Collegians' a transfusion of his attitude, they'll be in a very good position. I suspect I'm not the only one on here with enormous respect for Jordie.

There are only two leaps in our demographics which we need to overcome; Gawn and May. It is unfortunate that Jackson left (booooo) and that our veteran forwards stumbled enough to make Petty to forward a near-compulsory move in 2023. Otherwise I'd say succession for both positions is well covered. Ont he bright side, we have a wave of drafted talent coming through which would normally be associated with a bottom-4 team and I suspect an equally surprising salary cap position by the end of 2024. Given our recruiting record over the last 5 years I'm confident that we can rise to the challenge of targeting two very specific roles with perhaps a 3-year delay before any other positional needs become urgent.

"Good article could have been great but let down by lack of rhetorical questions. What could be the fallout between author and editor? This AFL Champion has the inside word."

I'm glad BBO went first (it was inevitable anyway), but now in honor of Moonshadow, oh Google, do your thing; How was Uranus discovered? Top 10 FUN Facts about Uranus. Why is Uranus tilted towards the sun? Why Is Uranus The Only Planet Without Interesting Features On It?

It was Biffen Lakes 5 posts ago. By the end of the day it'll be Biffen Puddles. That sounds like a delightful place, actually. 'I'm off to Biffen Puddles for the weekend'.

Lee Halfey Oswald?

Bob. Wormy. Eve. Newton. Steve Jobs &/or Mac. Toucan.