Demonstone

Not the footy media, Nasher.

Riz and iz rhyme with quiz!

I agree that we need professional umpires managed by a competent director. However, it is not the umpire who is the problem here. Toby Greene's behaviour is the problem.

Spring is here, the grass is riz, it's still ten days until the Prelim iz. What better time to roll out another quiz? As usual, you need to work out the common factor with these players. Answers in a PM please so we can keep it going a bit longer. B: Marty (Tom) Gleeson John (Ronnie) Barker Ben (Woody) Allen H/B: Cameron (Lenny) Bruce Jared (Joan) Rivers Chris (Paul) McDermott C: Jordan (Jerry) Lewis Greg (Robin) Williams Marc (Eddie) Murphy H/F: Dustin (Steve) Martin Jesse (Paul) Hogan Chris (Billy) Connolly F: Anthony (Chris) Rock Peter "2MP" (Steven) Wright Michael (Ed) Byrne R: Jason (Lucille) Ball Patrick (Rodney) Dangerfield Sam (David) Mitchell I/C: Josh (Jimmy) Carr Nathan (Milton) Jones Tim (Frankie) Boyle James (Peter) Cook

I thought that was for the Trapezius muscle.

"Welcome to your Grand Final commentary. Max Gawn has won the toss and the Demons will be kicking to the Sea of Tranquility end here at Lunar Park. The atmosphere at the ground is severely lacking and the playing surface not only resembles a dust bowl but is also quite uneven and appears to be full of craters. Flags on top of the stand are completely limp but the view is out of the world. Thankfully, the lights are on and we can confirm that the half-time entertainment is Pink Floyd."

Craig McRae is widely known in footy by the nickname "Fly". Does this mean we can refer to his baby Magpies as "Maggots"?

He can consider himself lucky to only get three weeks.

As a painter, Ronnie makes a half-decent guitarist. More trivia - he had an older brother called Art Wood who was not only a singer, but a graphic artist!

I'm getting more confused by the minute here, IRW! Do you mean Bobby Keys? Or Jim Keays from the Masters Apprentices? Both are now sadly deceased. Trivia Time: Bobby was born on the same day as Keith Richards.

I've heard some serious damage was caused and the fence will need to be replaced.

My level of concern for all those poor Bomber fans ...

Brisbane wouldn't be unhappy watching these sides slog it out in the wet, heavy conditions.

I am a fan. Darryl Jones plays bass guitar, not sax.

Ever noticed how the commentators always call Easton Wood by both his names, never just "Wood"? It's as if there's a player out there called "Easternwood".

???

He was largely unsighted last night. You can cite me on that.

Wee are amused by this observation. However, in poker terms, he's more your pair of twos than a royal flush.

It was only a few weeks ago that it looked like he'd done his hamstring (can't think which game it was) and came off the ground, only to return and see out the match - much to everyone's surprise. Maybe he has had another episode of the classic "hamstring awareness" and will be fine to play next game.

It was pleasing to get the four points tonight.

Deserving of suspension for mine.

Love Greene, hate Papley. On that basis ... carna Jiants.

Does "under 22" refer to Jaidyn Stephenson's IQ?

Neil Balme has been appointed as Head of Football at the Adelaide Crows, which is a very good get for them.