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THE FAT CHRONICLES - FREE AGENCY by The Oracle

Life was so much simpler ten years ago when we had a trade week that lasted, erm, well ... a week. Representatives of the sixteen AFL clubs would meet in the sponsors' boxes at Pricefixer Park on the Monday and that would be followed by seven days of argy bargy mixed with a little subterfuge and deception, stories would abound of players and draft picks changing places and in the end, perhaps a dozen or possibly twenty deals would get done, most of them singularly unspectacular. The result was often one of boredom mixed with disappointment met with a shrug of the shoulders and it was on to the next thing which was the national draft meeting in November.

I must have missed something because, while this has been going on, those of us who have carefully watched the shenanigans of trade week have openly advocated that the entire process dragged on over too many days. Everybody was waiting for the action to hot up and reach a hectic, dramatic climax in the last day and a half. The pundits were all saying that the AFL should cut the player exchange period down to three days simply to restore some sanity into the picture. 

Well, the AFL, being the AFL, has suddenly taken a mysterious U turn following the introduction of free agency and has co-joined that concept with the trade period and extended it out to close on to the whole of the month of October. That's why I call it the "FAT" period, which stands for "Free Agency & Trade". The official AFL Free Agency Period runs from 1 October to 5pm on 19 October while the AFL Trade Period runs from 8 October to 2pm on 26 October.

By the time we get to the end of the line on that last Friday of next month many of you will risk being left emotionally and physically wrecked by the twists and turns of the FAT period unless you are properly prepared for the ordeal.

I'm here to help you get through this difficult time and to ensure that life remains as uncomplicated as possible during this time.

The first thing to remember is the "much ado about nothing" rule which applies to a lot of the AFL's business. Despite the warnings of doom and all the hype about free agency, it's not really going to make a difference to most of our lives. One or two big names might change clubs, a number of hopefuls and lesser lights will get involved and a few of them could find new homes and some aging players will boost their pensions. 

That's it folks. No great dramas!

If you don't believe me, here's the latest list of players available as free agents -

Complete list of Free Agents:

Restricted Free Agents

Angus Monfries (Essendon); Brent Moloney (Melbourne); Troy Chaplin, Danyle Pearce (Port Adelaide); Luke McGuane (Richmond); Brendon Goddard (St Kilda).

Unrestricted Free Agents

Chris Knights (Adel Crows); Jordan Russell, Bret Thornton (Carlton); Ben Johnson (Collingwood); Ricky Dyson, Dustin Fletcher, David Hille, Nathan Lovett-Murray, Henry Slattery (Essendon); Luke McPharlin (Fremantle); Shannon Byrnes, Josh Hunt (Geelong Cats); Thomas Murphy, Michael Osborne, Clinton Young (Hawthorn); Matthew Bate, Lynden Dunn, Jared Rivers (Melbourne); Brett Ebert, Steven Salopek, Jacob Surjan (Port Adelaide); Jason Blake, Raphael Clarke (St Kilda); Jude Bolton, Jarred Moore (Sydney Swans); Quinten Lynch, Mark Nicoski (West Coast); Will Minson (Western Bulldogs).

At a guess, no more than about half of this list is likely to change clubs. The rest will either stay put or retire. With a few exceptions (Brendon Goddard mooted to go to the Bombers very early in the proceedings) the changes are unlikely to represent much more than a blip on the radar although hundreds of articles will be written and thousands of discussions and arguments started on the subject with much time of that time wasted. The rumours, innuendo and scuttlebutt have already been flying around the media and the Internet for several weeks. Fear not and remember "much ado about nothing".

Now, I've gone all this way without explaining Free Agency and that is because much of the information about the topic has been released by the AFL in dribs and drabs and if I didn't know better (and I actually don't) I would be saying that they're making it all up as they go. However, for a better understanding of the process, I refer you to FA explained by Luke Holmesby of the AFL's own site. He makes a good fist of it and I'll be back from time to time on an irregular basis to discuss the latest developments of this year's FAT Period.

Sit back and enjoy the ride!

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Can someone clever point out a few of next years end of season free agents?

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