HEAD TO HEAD - HANNABAL INTERVIEWS LETHAL LEIGH

[Demonland 70,312]

Following Leigh Matthews' comments on the 7 broadcast of the Essendon v Melbourne game at Etihad Stadium to the effect that, "I've been watching Watts closely for five minutes and I've seen nothing to suggest why he would be number one pick," we sent Hannabal out to get an interview. This is the result:

Hannabal: Thanks for your time, Leigh.

Leigh: You're vewy vewy welcome.

Hannabal: Leigh, you seem to have unnecessarily potted Jack Watts and the MFC over the weekend. Is there any particular reason?

Leigh: Alan Jawwott.

Hannabal:Alan Jarrott ? What did Alan do, Leigh?

Leigh: Jawwott whacked me at the MCG in 1984.

Hannabal: Hang on Leigh, I was there that day and Alan was remonstrating with you for your king hit on Steven Smith. In fact, you hit him that hard he lost his toupe.

Leigh: Wasn't it Peter Giles?

Hannabal: No, your king hit on Giles was another day.

Leigh: Oh. Didn't Smith lose all his hair from awa... awa... umm, err ...awa

Hannabal: Alopecia?

Leigh: That's it.

Hannabal: Let's move on. Leigh, what are your thoughts on Melbourne's list?

Leigh: I think they're in a lot of twubble. In fact, I think they'll be anchored to the bottom for years.

Hannabal: How many times have you seen them play this year?

Leigh: Once - once live.

Hannabal: Once? It must have been a real eye opener to make such a judgment after so little exposure to the team and list?

Leigh: Yes, they were vewy vewy bad.

Hannabal: It's a pity you missed the match against the Bulldogs. But what about Sammy Blease, Strauss, Garland, Maric, Aussie, Spencer and some of the other under 20's?

Leigh: Who? I'm not familwa with those players. But I liked the look of Juwwah and Gwimes.

Hannabal: Lucky we didn't do this interview a week ago or you wouldn't have heard of Jurrah either. Speaking of Grimes, you gave him to Melbourne.

Leigh: Weally? I did?

Hannabal: Yes, you gave Melbourne pick 14 for Twavis, err Travis Johnstone and Melbourne used that pick on young Jack..... Are you ok, Leigh ? Here, have some water. Speaking of young Jacks, do you think you were a bit harsh on Jack Watts the other night ?

Leigh: No, he looked like a schoolboy playing against men.

Hannabal: Leigh, he was a schoolboy playing against men. How did an 18 year old Jonathan Brown equip himself in his first few games ?

Leigh: I weally can't wemember, but he was a vewy vewy stwong boy Jonathan, so I expect he went pwetty well.

Hannabal: Let me refresh your memory. Brown had no possessions in his first game and one possession in his third. In fact, it took him until game 7 to kick his first goal.

Leigh: Weally ? Well, young key position players take longer to develop.

Hannabal: Leigh, I put it to you that you don't really know much about young Watts, or the Melbourne list at all.

Leigh: Well, I can only judge them on what I see and Fwiday night wasn't vewy impwessive.

Hannabal: No disputing that. Thanks for your time Leigh. But I must say I'm 99% certain that tomorrow I'll be 100% sure you're a dill.