Tony Tea

Goosebumps.

Skilled, outside runner with real pace. EXACTLY what we need.

Prime Minister coup or Collingwood drug scandal? Herald Sun absolutely stumped for today's front page.

No need to import Goddard. I'm sure we can find someone amongst our current players who can sledge teammates, tip over food and point.

Chanel No.7 stinks.

See what I mean. "Fvcken biast Collingwood one because of the umpires nothing else!!! Port played better all day but time and gone again got screwed, port must make a stand against VFL! Let's sit out a year and just play SANFL, that'll teach them. We e the moat successful!!! #aflpiespower #pAfc ?"

The connection between Melbourne's cancelled camp and Melbourne's on-field performance has one significant upside: it is a perfect example of a non sequitur.

Port fans are much worse than Collingwood fans.

We clearly struggle most with Clarko Footy. Surely we could learn about finding a way through a zone defence with one of Clarko's senior assistants.

Robbo thinks it is WC or North. (I have heard it is WC or Melbourne.) "All-Australian Gaff clearly is in demand. The Kangaroos believe it’s between them and West Coast and while St Kilda is making noises about wanting to talk to Gaff — and any player who has a pulse, for that matter — they accept he isn’t going to call Moorabbin home."

Too many people went into Sunday's game expecting Melbourne would roll Sydney just because. Look at the facts. Sydney has an organised defence. Melbourne struggles against an organised defence. Ipso facto, Melbourne would struggle against Sydney.

On the upside, we are almost always in games against top sides. Only a few years ago, top sides almost always reamed us.

That's because the media is too busy talking up Collingwood as potential premiers. Even when the Pies lose, they win.

Yes, but if Spargo can improve his power and strength over the ball (as you would expect from a first year player), he will be a very good footballer because he has all the requisite natural talents.

Wallowing in filth is allegedly good for the soul. I beg to differ.

First time we've ever beaten the Crows twice in one season.

Like electric wicket in back yard cricket, the AFL should introduce electric goals so teams can score at both ends of the ground.

I always though Luther clicked the bottles too fast. Cats fans on that terrace are a bunch of bumpkins.

No, North had the highest "for".

We are doing just about everything right... except win.

We need outside pace and possibly another big defender.

Limping into 10th, more like.

As soon as opposition sides set up to block Melbourne's game plan, Melbourne goes to water. That said, if we can ever find a way to improve our efficiency going forward, we will win a lot of games. Our wasteful forward thrusts are absolutely killing us.

Probably not. He appears to be playing out time.

Fremantle lost Fyfe and Sandilands today, which at least gives us a chance next week. But I can't see us winning another game if we jag a win against The Dockers.