Mazer Rackham

Two players who hired a sprint coach and got faster. Bob Skilton Kevin Bartlett Some of you may have heard of them.

Scene: AFL house. Gillon McLaughlin is sitting in an enormous leather chair, cradling a large brandy balloon. At the foot of the chair, crouching on all fours, is Paul Marsh, AFLPA CEO. McLaughlin's feet are on his back. GM: Ahhhh ... nothing like a brandy to settle the tum after a long lunch, eh Geoff? PM: I suppose so Mr McLaughlin. I've never actually had a-- GM: And a roaring open fire. Takes the winter chill off. PM: Yes Mr McLaughlin. Could we move away from it a bit? It's very hot and I'm starting to-- GM: I'm pleased with you, Rod. I think we get on exceptionally well. You and your player co-op thingy, and me with my international standard sporting competition. PM: Yes, Mr McL-- GM: I mean, we hardly ever have a disagreement. It's very unusual in the business world to be as harmonious as we are. PM: Yes Mr McLaughlin. GM: It pleases me. PM: Thank you Mr McLaughlin. GM: Those player agents though. I'm hearing that some players aren't happy with the way we're handling the Essendon situation. PM: That's right Mr McLaughlin! GM: We're not going to hear any more from them, are we Shaun? PM: Well actually Mr McLaughlin, the other players are-- GM: I said, we're not going to hear any more from them, are we? PM: (pause) No Mr McLaughlin. GM: The alpacas need a wash this weekend. See to it. And while I'm at the Hawthorn game, get the Bentley waxed. PM: Yes Mr McLaughlin. GM: Not many people have it as good as we do, eh Graham? Put another log on the fire. PM: Yes Mr McLaughlin.

So ... anyone up for a bit of in-depth discussion and banter about percentages?

Melbourne Football Club - Jesus F***in' Christ!!!!!!

I recall you were supposed to streak across the ground. Where were you when we needed you?

Weather radar looks like there will be some showers during the game but it should mostly be rain free. Does mean the ball will be wet though. Carlton's best shot is to turn the game into a low-skill close in slog. Like other teams have done to us, and beaten us doing so. We need to blow them off the park early to deny them any sniff.

Don't forget to keep your end of the bargain by refusing to go to Pies games.

Because the AFL is a wholly disinterested, impartial, arms-length organisation that prides itself on being even-handed, won't bow to vested interests, never plays favourites and is not at all arbitrary or vindictive.

Yes, Ethan made every effort to alert team management that he was going to p!ss all over a gas station.

Well as an omen, my CAT caught a MAGPIE this afternoon.

Maybe my imagination is playing tricks on me but it seemed like he for a long time was playing third fiddle to Brown and Lynch. Anyway, point is Pedo is good depth and deserves to stay.

No, we have to win big tomorrow. Otherwise it becomes very difficult in the last round.

Even Scully may yet have his part to play. Like the guy in lord of the rings. He may bite off Brent Harvey's finger in the last minute to get the win.

Serbia? They must be sh!t at AFL. Just as well they're good at basketball.

Prefer finals for your reason #1 but will sleep well either way, provided we don't disgrace ourselves in the next two rounds.

He deserves to (Pedo that is) as he has proved to be excellent depth. If you can remember Bradshaw for the Brions, at one stage he hardly got a game but whenever he did he performed. Pedo not quite in that class but he knows what to do and usually does it.

African or European percentage?

@petracca attack, I want to like your post more than once!

They're probably trying right now to think of a way for Essendon to make the 8.

Yes.

Not quite. The more North score, the more GWS have to win by to have the same impact. A low scoring game makes it easier for them to drive North's percentage down.

On another note ... I did enjoy seeing Scott seething quietly in the box after the siren. He was probably thinking: "those f@ckin' umps!!!"

Let's say North lose by a point next week, scores 80 to 81. their percentage drops to 107.3. We have to make the big inroads tomorrow.

I'm just showing roughly the magnitude of the task to match North's current percentage. We can't assume it will drop by much next week if they lose, and we can't assume our game against Geelong will be a percentage booster either. We have to make the biggest impact tomorrow.

What you say is right but do the maths and you will see that Watts the matter is also right.