MELBOURNE'S TOUGHEST TEST FOR 2006 - THE BYE

[Demonland 66,967]

MELBOURNE'S TOUGHEST TEST FOR 2006 - THE BYE by Randy M.M. Savage

Dejavu!

It's almost nine months since I left the country to do some valuable work for my country offshore (and for viewers of Prison Break - no, I have not been in Irak or in jail!) and, for the second time in three years, I arrive back home, the appetite whetted for a decent game of footy live in the flesh only to find out that the Demons have taken their annual leave this week.

Being jet lagged makes it hard to get up at some ungodly hour of the night to watch a game of soccer and besides, there was plenty of that where I've been and I'm sick of nil all draws and the sight of grown men fainting in broad daylight for no apparent reason at all.

So I take myself off to the local newsagent where I buy every available newspaper - especially Inside Football - where I discover that lo and behold, we're eight wins, four defeats and poised to grab a spot in the top four. Well, based on that information and what little video action I manage to catch since my return, I reckon they don't need a break at all and neither do I because who needs to spend their first weekend back home mowing the bloody lawn? And contrary to the image of the stereotypical Demon fan, I don't even know how to ski let alone how to locate Falls Creek or Thredbo, even with the aid of my outdated edition of the Melways.

I've spent the week enmeshing myself in the happenings of the season to date and I come to the same conclusion as I did last year and the year before that - Melbourne's biggest challenge is to get over the bye and to perform better after the break than before.

Really, that's what the premiership teams generally do. You only need to look at the 2005 premiers, the Sydney Swans. Prior to their bye last year they were sitting in sixth spot with seven wins and five losses before winning eight out of the last ten home and away matches to finish third. During that period their percentage soared from 98.9% to 116.4%. The rest of course is history.

The mid season break has been the bane of Melbourne's existence in recent years.

Back in 2003 when the team was going through the doldrums, it travelled to Adelaide before the break and was flogged mercilessly by 73 points giving it a 3-9 win-loss ratio and a percentage of 77.1, ahead only of the Western Bulldogs. The Demons returned refreshed to surprise St. Kilda by 7 goals at the G and Carlton by 7 points at Optus Oval but failed to win another game and finished 14th, thereby earning the priority pick that netted Colin Sylvia in that year's draft. Essendon was the only team outside the eight to break into finals action replacing the Kangaroos.

The following year saw Melbourne in second place at 10-3 after their 26-point victory over Essendon (ironically, they beat the Magpies on Queens Birthday a week earlier). They were just one game behind the pacemakers St. Kilda. After the break, the Demons faltered against the Crows, which had just sacked Garry Ayres as coach replacing him with the virtually unknown Neil Craig. The 12-goal defeat at AAMI Stadium saw Melbourne's percentage drop from 124.8 to 116 but it recovered with a 57-point victory over the Saints.

After that however, the Demons were unconvincing against some of the lowly teams but they still managed to grab top spot after 18 rounds before going into free fall and losing their remaining five games for the year including am elimination final against the Bombers. On their way down, they slipped to fifth after the home and away series and seventh after the finals. Fremantle was the only top eight team at the break to lose its place when the Eagles grabbed a finals berth with five wins on end late in the season.

Last year, the Demons were again in second place at the break with 9 wins and 4 losses having gone down by 15 points to the Eagles on the MCG, just five days after playing winning against the Pies on Queens Birthday. Before the West Coast game Melbourne had 36 premiership points and a percentage of 121.5. Seven defeats later they were still on 9 wins and their percentage had dropped to 94.4 after a horror run that saw them drop as low as tenth. A few last gasp victories saw them back into the eight but injuries took their toll and they were eliminated from the race by Geelong. Of the teams outside the eight after the break, only the fast finishing Saints made the finals displacing Richmond.

So what now?

I'm told that there's been something different about the Dees in 2006. I'm a believer so I'll go along with the theory put forward by many of the experts at Demonland and agree that this year the team will not falter, that it will win more than it's share of games for the remainder of the season and that it will finally have a big crack at winning the flag in September.

In the meantime, I'm that desperate for some footy that I'm going to turn up at the G on Sunday just to watch the grass grow on my favourite paddock. After all, I spent my hard earned cash on a membership ticket and have yet to watch the boys in action.

Here's my preview of this week's bye: -

THE GAME

Bye at M.C.G on Sunday, June 25 2004 at 2:10pm AEST

HEAD TO HEAD

OVERALL Byes 11 Melbourne drawn 11

AT THE MCG Byes 11 Melbourne drawn 11

THIS CENTURY Byes 6 Melbourne drawn 6

THE COACHES Played 6 Neale Daniher drawn 6

WANT A BET? Even money. Each of 2

THE MEDIA

TELEVISION - Channel 31 watch the fish and/or the pensioners go round.

RADIO Radio Moldova will be playing martial music followed by three hours of silence while the technicians attempt to effect repairs during a scheduled equipment breakdown.

RECENT HISTORY

Melbourne has done it a bit too easily when they have had the bye in recent years. Neale The Reverend Daniher will use all of his wily skills to motivate his charges for this week's inactivity.

LAST TIME THEY MET

I seriously can't remember last year's bye. It must have been pretty uneventful.

THE TEAMS

Melbourne - not selected at the time of writing

Umpires attending seeing eye dog training school all weekend.

THE TACTICS

Because of the bye, things will be very low key. The coach will not do any spruiking at all over the weekend, players will not be available for interviews with the media and Caroline Wilson will refrain from slagging off at any AFL club other than the one she supports and Sammy Newman won't complain about the umpires or about how the game has deteriorated since he retired.

SHOCK FACTOR

The AFL is always full of surprises. I wouldn't be surprised in the least if one or two of the clubs decided to sack their coach on the pretext of the team's failure to reach the required standard during the week of the bye.

THE TIP

Stay home, borrow tapes of all of the Demon victories so far this season, watch them and then check if you have enough fly buy points to book a flight to Brisbane in a couple of week's time.

[Demonland: there is a game on in town on Saturday. Sandringham v Bendigo Bombers at the Trevor Barker Beach Road Oval Sandringham at 1.10pm. The game will be televised on the ABC and broadcast on SEN. At least a dozen Demons will be in action. MFC members might get a discount as visiting members so bring your membership card. Demonland will bring you reports of all the action from Barry from Beach Road.]