pantaloons

I think we'll get there (just) but have zero chance of reaching the second round. Just making the playoffs and avoiding the humiliation of missing out is enough for me after a disastrous campaign. Nice to see Golden State make it for just the second time in 19 years.

If Melbourne finish with four or less wins this year, then it must receive a priority pick or the priority system should be abandoned altogether. Personally, I think the priority pick system, while well-intentioned, must go. I can't believe the AFL didn't take the logical route at the end to the tanking fiasco and simply abolish the priority pick. That said, if the pick still exists and Melbourne qualify, to not award the Demons one would be malicious bordering on an AFL conspiracy. The reasons outlined by clubs, who obviously have a conflict of interest here, are ludicrous. By the same logic, we should never receive any draft picks given our penchant for destroying the careers of young AFL hopefuls for the last six years. In which case, we have no place in the competition.

Someone get these volunteers a medal. Or at least a commemorative stick pin. Thanks for the work, and the insight.

"There were only so many threads on Demonland about my position as CEO I could take..."

It's the annual salary the club will be paying pantaloons to take the helm as coach from 2014.

Look, I get the gist of the OP's point and that we're presently going nowhere. We also appointed an untried coach after Bailey when it was painfully obvious to all and sundry that an experienced head was required, but that's done now - we can only learn from it. But please, please. Any attempt to look at 186 or 148 as anything but the players putting in disgraceful bordering on mutinous efforts is sickening to me.

They will both end their careers as statistically two of the worst coaches in VFL/AFL history. There is no rationalising 186 either - it was an unmitigated flaming disgrace, as was last night.

More importantly, who would have thought that West Coast would start the season 0-3? Amazing!

I keep hearing people say how brave Paul Roos would be to take this job on. If that's what he says, tack on another zero to his wage. Debt Demolition wasn't undertaken so that we could employ more people to staple leaflets. The next coaching hire couldn't be more critical. He's perfect for the job. Melbourne, do what a good club does and make it happen.

I think they are important though. Not wanting to be too blunt, but he'd be one of the shortest priced favourites in AFL history to end up dead or in gaol before his career is out, and I'd imagine if we had drafted him and that eventuated then we'd have a 400 page thread on due diligence to endure.

After racing to get ready, driving close to an hour to get to the game including madly trying to find a park, eventually settling on one opposite the shrine and then running to the ground, I was literally about to take my seat when Nicholson violated this rule. You may argue that walking straight back to the car at that point would have been time better spent than staying for the game I suppose.

Flop me dead. This is like asking if Justin Leppitsch should ask Sofia Vergara out on a date. We are a festering toilet bowl at the moment and if we could click our fingers tomorrow and have Clarkson coach our Round 2 game and onwards it would be the greatest development this club has seen since writing the rules of the game. If there was any chance of this happening at the end of the season, we'd have to throw everything at him. No doubt we'd hire Jason Akermanis instead if his PowerPoint blew the interview panel away.

This all comes back to the coaching hire in the first place. People here will staunchly claim that we had no chance of landing Malthouse. That Roos would not have come back for anything. That an experienced coach with some clout like Eade or Sheedy before him was not worth pursuing. That we knew best. It's the attitude of losers. Great clubs make these things happen. At least if the team failed under a great coach you'd at least be able to identify the exact problem, run the team bus off a cliff and start afresh.

1.10 on Easter Sunday is the worst timeslot of the entire season. If it's a nice day, then 20,000 would be a fantastic result.

It's actually merciful that he doesn't do a top 100 list, as he could probably get away with just Jones in there on current output.

Love your work, gents. It was pretty much Murphy's Law for the first half of the season but the team has played well the last 20 games (14-6). The same record over the last 20 will see us make the playoffs. Once in there, we won't get past the first round, but would have a better shot against San An. Yesterday's game was ridiculous. Out scored them 25-2 over the last 8.30. With our generally dismal D, that's just crazy. Utah does have a tough run home and I don't know how they win so many games as it is.

Three days on, for Pete's sake. If we are so enamoured with the scoreboard results of a couple of practice halves, the first game ended with Melbourne 5.6 to 5.5. North beat us with the same legitimacy that George Costanza beat Bubble Boy in Trvial Pursuit with the moops question.

That is like being given Brussels sprouts for dinner, complaining about it and then being handed a turd sandwich instead. I disagree with pretty much everything Kennett says about football.

Today has been a very sad one for the NBA and of course for the Lakers. I'll forever be grateful to Jerry Buss for all he did for the franchise, and for the enjoyment he brought to my life. Following this team has been immensely rewarding and he gets the credit for a lot of that. So many owners in US sports are more interested in making a profit than winning championships, but Buss had such a genuine understanding of the importance of winning, and the dollars followed. He was tremendously good and loyal to his own, a visionary, an entertainer, but most of all, a winner. Dr Jerry Buss, thank you.

And so it goes on. We can debate the level of Melbourne's debauchery in 2009 in comparison to other 'tankers' all we like, but whether you eat your vegetables pureed, with a knife and fork or with a sprinkling of garnish, you are still eating your vegetables. Personally, I don't care who did it worse, because I don't have a problem with tanking, list managing, or putting oneself in the best possible position for future success. It is an indisputable fact that three of the last seven premierships would not have been won without the aid of some level of tanking. All the AFL needs to say tomorrow is that they are taking investigations seriously by introducing a draft lottery system so that there is significantly less incentive to deliberately lose for cellar-dwellers at the end of a lost season.

We have to wait to hear the actual charges, but from the very spotty evidence we've been presented with, would the AFL not save face if they announced that there was insufficient evidence that Melbourne did anything in violation of league rules? Would it not also be better for the AFL's image to be able to say that they conducted an exhaustive examination into a tanking case and found that the club in question (and by default the AFL also) was clean?

I've never seen the appeal of illicit drugs and see first hand their adverse affects frequently in my line of work. However I believe that performance enhancing drugs are by far the bigger of the two drug issues for the AFL. PEDs impact on the integrity of the competition, other drugs don't. Recreational drugs are an issue for the individual, and the people who are affected by their habit. I don't want Melbourne or any club being told that their crack-loving player has to be sacked on the first finding of guilt. I can see the appeal for a club in quarantining the rest of the team from an addicted teammate, but friends will associate with each other regardless of whether they see each other at the club several times a week. Anyway, it's a sad issue. Very sad.

If there was any shred of evidence that we had breached rule 19(A5) or whatever it is, Caro would have been all over it and the AFL would have had our slacks down long ago. Basically, the negotiations may have gone like this condensed version: AFL: "We don't like what you did in 2009, here are some draft and monetary penalties." MFC: "On the basis of what evidence?" AFL: "Chris Connolly's lame joke book". MFC: "We'll see you in court. You do realise, you can't win this case in a court of law don't you?" AFL: "Monetary penalties then, and some slaps for some clowns we don't like. Don't worry, we'll give you the money back at the next handout". MFC: "We want complete exoneration. This whole thing is a farce. We can't lose this in court." AFL: "How would you enjoy the nice surrounds of Darwin on Queens Birthday weekend, and two games against the top five every year for the next twenty years?" MFC: "We'll take the cash thanks." Surely whatever is officially handed down next week is done with MFC approval after lengthy negotiation.

And just quietly, there's a slight talent gap between the two so we may show just a fraction more patience with Mitch, even in the unlikely event that the injury is worse than is being reported.

I don't know if it's because Caro is stupid or vindictive, but she continues to trot out the same tired arguments. One of these is that McLardy didn't address her issues. Perhaps this is because in nine articles lambasting Melbourne, she never once demonstrated that Melbourne actually violated AFL rules, and therefore anything she had to say was inconsequential.