Biffen

I think a "Storm in a teacup" button and a "you really hurt my feelings" button are in order. To balance it out ,perhaps a "Man up" button . we also need to have "racist connotations" ,"deliberately racist" and "unintentionally racist" for those that like to pull the race card early. Also, I have personally noted a "Shut your Face Biffen" button would be useful for many . Also a "what the F%#k are you on about WYL" button ,"keep it clean"for BBO etc etc.

The team should be unchanged. Steve Smith should be rolling the arm over as should Clarke if his back is right. Every time we pick a spinner based on expectation or to "pressure "Lyon it backfires. Lyon seems to have confidence in himself now to be able to restrict runs . If Watto lays off the cake and beer he may be able to bowl. Let these batting all-rounders take some load off Harris. With Mitch Johnson-you dont stop a train .Let him bowl until he is finished. Pick Ahmed if and when he gets a big bag in Shield cricket. I would have Agar ahead of him anyway as he is a proven test performer,gets bounce,can bat,field and irritates the Poms with his niceness.

Please don't leap too high-it may cause controversy. I was thinking of going myself but I don't know whether to wear the tattered wife beater singlet in blue or red. Might leave my skinny jeans at home. look forward to hearing "the vibe".

They are related according to Johnathon. There was also mention of Ben Wardill being a mate who visited Trott at Kew asylum. There was a Wardill who played for Melbourne back in the day.

Harry Trott suffered mental seizures that may well been epilepsy or alcoholic in origin. He was in the prime of his career at 31-nearly the same age as his distant relative. He was Captain of Australia at the time ,having returned victorious from an ashes tour . He was born in Collingwood ,played for South Melbourne ,Victoria and Australia. He recovered from a long stint at Kew to captain his state again. His story is extremely sad. There was an oval named in his honour in Albert Park which has since been removed by parks Vic. There was also one named after him in Bendigo-where he played after his illness.

For the history buffs-this is not the first time a Trott has walked away from test cricket in his prime due to mental stress. Can anyone name the other time ,player, circumstances etc.

"Keato-the real story" part 3 tonight. Will be funny to watch. Smooth bastard. Abbott would have had his arse served to him by Keating in no time.

Man is not a camel passing through the eye of a needle. One often needs a bracing ale to fight the evils of this world.Often.

Lucky you weren't mentioned on here in the portly category. The guy who copped it here for carrying a bit had cancer drugs as an excuse. I'm afraid "all the Shiraz stocks are being drunk by the Chinese nouveau riche and there will be none left for me" is not an excuse anymore.

Bringing in the Sheep Dear Lord. What a unifying presence you are for us all.

Enough of this.This Whole thing is starting to Flounder.

There are too many shellfish remarks here. Sorry Redleg, but you are a plum duck in this case.

Jokes like that should be Black Beaned from the site.

Theres no need for Won ton pun abuse. Some of the jokes on here are battered enough.

Whispering Jack-Was that also the year the US released a very strong form of LSD on to the streets-just a thought. Colin-tell your friend I like his style-minimal as it is.

I don't need to come here to be insulted-I can go anywhere for that. you are a very sensitive soul and I wish you well with your blogging. There were one or two disagreements on here but it's hardly big time stuff.

Quite right-I was going to mention the McGrath incident as the exception. As far as the Monkey thing goes-I still dont think Symonds sooked so much as the stump cam gave up the culprits, from memory. What Warner did was prime-time trash talking.

I do . Warner wasn't complaining,just making an observation after a win. The English began their whinging after that. I expect the sledging to continue in earnest and hope it stays on the field. Do you think Warners comments were designed to send Trott packing? I doubt they were meant to be that malicious. I feel sympathy for Trott-none whatsoever for Peiterson,Broad,Swan,Cook,Root ,Prior,Anderson et al. Hope they can cop the abuse and try to win but they will lose and whinge .

I would never use race or personal attacks on the field and I am not sure Warner was privvy to Trotts mental state prior to the comments he made. It is quite laughable that we call a moratorium on sledging now because the Poms are feeling sooky. I would suggest they are big boys who were able to give it out over the last three series wins. Do you know-I don't think I have ever heard an Australian publicly complain about a sledge on the field to the media.Ever. The English are dreaming if they think they will not cop an increasing degree of mockery in the series. Get ready for a broken fuggin arm-and some badly hurt feelings old boys!

i am a big fan of effigy burning. Media stunts involving mock funerals or indeed fake funerals are a big part of my armory as well. The guy who makes the Uncle Sam effigies in the middle east could make a bit more effort with his creations. Also -if you are going to burn a bloody flag or an effigy ,I would like to see it light up in one go . Nothing more annoying than watching a three second news grab turn into a six second news grab because the effigy isn't flammable enough . You would think some of these oil rich nations could work it out .They give effigy burners everywhere a bad ,neigh ,incompetent ,name.

he was no Tony Campbell ,who was no Danny Hughes .

He might be open to a sleazy three way deal.

He's big and gruff on the outside but inside hes just a little boy with a huge collection of footy cards with "SPUD" written across most of their faces. I volunteer to help counsel Ben in to the new millennium. I will need some help of course- and I will be enlisting Lord Weaver and BBO for their famous retreat/re-birthing clinic. Ben isn't much into the new wave stuff but we will tell him it's a boot camp for the soul.

SOmetimes you really know how to push my buttons-in a manly way of course!