Deestroy All

Lockhart is the [censored] worst. Looks like he’s having a laugh though so that’s the important part.

Lockhart got a game how?

Great zone defence this. Leave gigantic gaps for this boring 15m [censored] to consistently chip through us. Get rid of this [censored] coach.

Count the easy goals for them. That’s 1.

Pretty much the only reason I tune in in the first place is to watch Oliver. Not much else excites me. Trac has joined him, though.

Is this one of those we’re all being too negative so I’ll post any old positive garbage threads? Carlton came out in social distance mode. I’ve rarely seen a worse quarter from any team. If anything we should’ve put 8 goals minimum on the board in the first quarter. If Goody gave Carlton their pre game rev up, then sure, great coaching. Unless we can beat teams in a shoot out, we’ll lose every week. We’re too easy to score against, and no team will ever give us a 7 goal head start again.

Sung the song without the Captain. Yikes.

Positives. Petracca, Rivers. Negatives. Melbourne Football Club

A win is a loss I guess.

Oooo here comes Goody, don’t worry boys, he’s come down to turn it around, crisis over.

Lever and May are the biggest frauds in the game.

5 defenders jumping for 1 ball. Just unwatchable this [censored] defence.

Kicking goals would help, but we’ve been slaughtered defensively since Roos walked out the door. Can recruit all the defenders in the world, makes no difference when whatever the team structure is just let’s them waltz down the field at their leisure. 10 haphazard inside 50s v a few open forward line entries with no pressure. Same old same old.

I’d take Black Plague with pick 3. If Spanish flu lasts until pick 21 you’ll be getting that for sure.

No respect for a defender who thought he was a star forward* Roos knew he was only a defender. Howe and Buckley thought otherwise. Took Buckley 10 minutes to realise Roos was right.

Biggest positive of the night was how [censored] Hawthorn were. I doubt they missed that many targets in the whole of 2014. If it wasn’t for Ceglar they wouldn’t have touched the ball. Long may it continue.

lol he said Hibberd was one of the best. Glad nothing has changed. Anyway, horrible footy for a lot of the time. I felt it last year, across all games, and lost interest for the first time in my life. But this time last year we were visibly unfit and outrun in these practice matches, it’s been the opposite this preseason. Langdon and Tomlinson look to be perfect pickups. Fritsch having 2 years wasted out of position will annoy me every time he kicks a goal now. Viney was excellent, easy to forget how good he is when he hits a form slump. So important that he stays fit. Lockhart looked good early last year too, so I’m not sure he’ll keep this up but I’m hoping he does. Backline looks solid. Overall; fitness and the wings are the biggest takeaway.

VDB went to the Matthew Bate school of below the knees.

Just popping in to tell @Satyriconhome his city is red.

Abandon all hope ye who enter here. American Psycho aka my bible.

We don’t ever spoil and kill a contest. Ever. It’s just [censored] infuriating. All year. We were killed in the air all preseason and it just hasn’t stopped.

Are we the first team to lead at half time without their midfield getting a touch?

Our defensive setup is deplorable. Everyone running around pointing like they know what they’re covering, while the opposition just chips it around for 2 minutes until they get a shot 20 out. Neal Bullen does absolutely everything wrong. I’ve never seen a player with a more negative effect.

Full credit yeah, taking 2 years to realise neither is a defender... lifetime of credits their, Goody, bravo.

2020 premiers!