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Mazer Rackham

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Everything posted by Mazer Rackham

  1. He was wondering how he could go back in time and prevent the McCartin/Petracca draft thing
  2. Scene: the coaches box at Cazaly Stadium Goody: Dunno about you Richo, but I have to admit, I was blindsided. Those Swans really came to play. I wasn't expecting that. That Longmire's a flippin' genius. I'll have to study the replays to work out what happened there. Richo: I reckon I've got it worked out. Goody: Yeah? Richo: Yeah. I used to coach this mob, you know. Goody: Did you? Richo: Yeah. The red white and ... red? Goody: You were a senior coach? Richo: Oh yes. I reckon I might have coached against you at some point. Goody: (thinks: I knew I'd seen this guy somewhere) Goody: Hang on ... wasn't that St Kilda? Red white and black? Richo: Was it? (thinks: red white and ... red white and ... oh [censored]) Richo: (coughs) Anyway ... have you ever noticed that our blokes can't catch the ball? Goody: (thinks) Goody: Yeeeeeeess ... Richo: Well, what if you made it so they never had to catch it? Goody: How? Richo: You roll the ball. You can't drop it if it's already on the ground. Goody: It makes sense. They'd never drop it cause it's already on the ground. Great thinking! Let's get on the phone to-- Richo: But wait. There's more. Goody: Crikey. More? You're a real ideas man, Richo. Richo: Yes ... yes, I think you're right. Anyway: you know how our blokes can't kick straight? If you're rolling the ball, you don't have to kick it. Cause you're rolling it. Goody: Yes, yes, I see what you mean. You can't kick out of bounds if you're not kicking it. Bloody hell. You're a flippin' genius. Richo: Yep. Goody: Let's get the coaches together. This will blow their minds. There's just ... Richo: What? Goody: I dunno ... something about this new idea ... I can't put my finger on it ... Richo: We'll trial the idea and see how it goes for two or three seasons, then fine tune it. Goody: You're my kind of thinker. I knew we got you in for a reason.
  3. Which one's Simon and which one's Alan?
  4. Another season of these young mens' careers squandered
  5. An omen! Don't go changing your birth date until the flag is firmly in our mitts.
  6. When has that ever stopped them from outrageous inconsistent decisions that defy precedent or even common sense? 100% They can start with a panel of people who are not lawyers and who have never played Aussie Rules football. But who have played high level sport (rugby, hockey, basketball). Compile a list of incidents from the past, covering most things ... sling tackles, punching, off the ball, etc etc ... and tell them "this incident should get 1 week", "this other incident should get 2 weeks", and so on. That's their reference library. And it should not necessarily reflect the actual punishments given by Mr "Protect the Stars" Christian, as making sense of that is bad for one's mental health. What's more, it's the act that is penalised. The outcome can weight the penalty, but the act itself should be the focus of scrutiny. Each week the panel goes over the cited incidents, compares them to the reference library, and decides on a punishment. In a perfect world, the panel would not need to be so exclusive, but the AFL have poisoned their MRP/tribunal system over the years to where no-one can have faith in ex-players being either objective or not bamboozled by ever-changing justifications. Christian himself seems punch drunk.
  7. Just another area where the AFL have lost control of the game. At this point the only area that they have control of is the price of chips at Etihad.
  8. On "social media". Enuff said.
  9. "... while completely objective opposition player with no ulterior motive, lunging at full stretch, who probably can't see it that well and almost certainly doesn't know the rules anyway, claims he touched it."
  10. Another quarter of football in 2020 where a team can manage to score only one goal. Oh hang on ... the other team didn't even manage that. Ugly ugly ugly. What has happened to our game?
  11. Only watching the second half but what a diabolical spectacle so far. What has our national game come to? It's horrible. Also the umpiring. Is it opposite day? About 1,000,000 frees missed and the only ones I've seen paid weren't there.
  12. You won't be surprised to hear that it is not defined in the rules. The only umpire calls defined are "play on", "touched play on" and "advantage". No "hold" or any other calls. What's more, the rules say "the field Umpire shall immediately call and signal ‘Touched Play On'", "the Player did not hear or see the signal of", etc, so clearly there are visual signals, but nowhere does it say what the signals are. We assume that they are along the lines of the gestures umpires make to indicate holding the ball, push in the back, etc. But how AFL to not even say what they are. (The "signals" for in the back, etc, are not defined either.) Just to reinforce what a shambles the AFL umpires department is, on the AFL web site, the "laws of the game" page has the 2019 rules. At the top of the page is a video, "2017 laws of the game - intro". The actual 2020 rules have to be obtained from the AFL umpires association web site.
  13. The rule for standing the mark says: 20.1 STANDING THE MARK AND THE PROTECTED AREA 20.1.1 Standing The Mark When a Player is awarded a Mark or Free Kick, one Player from the opposing Team may: (a) stand on The Mark; (b) move along a lateral line to the Protected Area defined in Law 20.1.2 without advancing beyond The Mark; or (c) otherwise be directed by a field Umpire. Naturally, there is no definition of what "lateral" means ... is it at a right angle to the goal-to-goal line, or is it at a right angle to the line of disposal (see below)? It's only been in the rules since 2019; prior to that there was no mention of "lateral" or moving sideways, even though it's been allowed basically since forever. 20.2 DISPOSAL FROM BEHIND THE MARK (a) A Player who has been awarded a Mark or Free Kick shall be directed by a field Umpire to dispose of the football within a reasonable time in a direct line from The Mark to the centre of their Goal Line. (b) If a Player does not dispose of the football within a reasonable time, or attempts to dispose of the football other than in a direct line over The Mark, the field Umpire shall call ‘Play On’ and the football shall immediately be in play. How many times have you seen a player take a mark or win a free and immediately start wandering sideways while they size up what to do with it? With no call of play on. Thousands? Millions? Incidentally, this idea of the "direct line", which everyone knows has always been part of footy since year dot, has only been in the rules since 2019. Before then, it only applied to shots on goal. This is an example of how inattentive the AFL has been over a long period, and how badly degenerate their umpiring department has become. It's a step in the right direction that they have noticed these deficiencies and attempted to make amends. But it's a drop in the ocean.
  14. How about my place? Big screen in the lounge, beer fridge in the garage, BBQ, pool table and nearby park for kick to kick at half time.
  15. They (FFC) were under a fair bit of pressure at the time. New kid on the block Bell saw the danger signs and tried to pull out of the trade, but the new president told him that the fans would crucify them if they let this once-in-a-generation talent slip through their fingers. subsequently, the urge to get him on the park at all cost must have been enormous. I think he's an old fashioned CHF, best when roaming around, marking, linking up, the odd bit of ruck work, while snagging the occasional sausage roll himself. But it's all moot now as I think the footy world has seen the best of him.
  16. Even when he was with us he looked like a bloke who preferred mucking around with his mates than do this thing he happened to be good at, namely, playing footy. I reckon he'd be more content playing at a lower level for the fun of it, and the after-match p*ss-up, where it's not for sheep stations and there is less scrutiny.
  17. Jeff had said he wanted to be a 10-year player at Melbourne, and become a MFC life member ... then he got a new manager, and within two weeks suddenly harboured a life-long dream to go back to Perth. Like a miracle.
  18. He's so vain, he probably thinks this thread is about him
  19. Wonna, maybe, but Jurrah ... born under a bad star and destined by fate not to be a long term AFL player. Would love to see Nev in a permanent role of mentoring, preferably for MFC.
  20. Conspiracy theorists rest. Mean = 0, standard deviation 28.8. All numbers within 2 standard deviations except North, who are just outside that. So very reasonable spread.
  21. Then we can kill him!
  22. Margetts inspires them to play fairly. When they see him in the middle their faces light up with resolve to play exactly to the rule book.
  23. Can I nominate a bog ordinary journeyman who comes with a talent spotter/recruiter in a package deal?
  24. That Corio Oval, just a cursed ground for the Saints.
  25. All true, but reading the Pies' forums, they think that Pendlebury was underdone, Reid (even before this round) is finished, and WHE wouldn't get a game at any top club. Thought it a miracle against the run of play that he took that mark in the goalsquare. More broadly, they're over Buckley as a coach, think he's one-dimensional and are getting back on the lines of "9 years ... how many chances does a coach get before time's up?" and noting that Clarkson may be available ... Good clubs, such as we aspire to be, should be spanking other clubs down on their luck, struggling with injuries, or simply off the boil. God knows it's happened to us enough. We're back in the territory where every round brings its own unique mental challenge. We should be better than that, but it beats the pants off 2019. Time to bring the blowtorch. GO DEMONS!
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