Earl Hood

Uncle you realise that while Biffo was in court today some poor sod fell out of a window at the Gat head first! Once he leaves others in charge, the place turns to chaos. Why is he so persecuted by the plod?

Gee there you go, all those shanigans going in my own backyard and I knew nothing of it. I have walked past the Laird numerous times but now that I think of it, it was always on one of my Saturday or Sunday morning constitutionals so from the outside at that time of day it always looked to me like it was a former hotel converted into apartments.

Dino lucky you didn't walk down the street to The Peel Hotel you would probably need counselling!

DC you are reminding me of the Wicker Man!

Yes Uncle I was thinking the same myself. Please can you pass on your address to me and I will send around two of my people to give you a bonus that you truly deserve!

If my memory serves me correctly I am sure I was quaffing a reasonable Merlot the last time I visited the Braybrook just before the brawl started over whether you could shoot backwards after your opponent had put the white ball in off a coloured ball. Come to think of it I never got to finish that Merlot, it ended up on someone's head!

Good summary, the club might want to keep one of Dunn and Garland as insurance, that would be 7 outs, given we have limited picks in the draft we may only want 6 or so changes, and one might be Mitch King as well.

ANB is a keep for me. He just needs some time.

Yes Emerald I have brought my Guava sales samples with me to take on South America myself after the Olympics, if I happen to pick up a bronze or silver, that would be a bonus. I have learnt my lesson after letting the likes of Uncle B do my bidding in Asia, a highly expensive debacle. Better I make my own contacts and sales in Brazil and then off further south.

Yes there have been some misunderstandings this week but I have emerged a better person I believe. And yes I have been off the air recently as I have been in transit to Rio following a distress call from Kitty to back up for the tennis squad! Kyrios has pulled the pin so I am there if needed for doubles action! Bring it on.

The latest update from Fitzroy Street is the police have some guy in a light blue Hawaiin tee shirt cornered on the roof of the Gatwick Inn. I wonder what this is all about?

Biff what the hell is going on News reports are that the Gat is surrounded by police and they in a stand off with some desperate character! Haven't you been paying your bills?

Or game plan? I assume the players are playing to instructions that are based on what they practice at training! Just a guess by me, it may be all quite different and maybe players make it up as they go.

Nut just the same this time, some 9 years later, a 3 hour 35 song tour de force by The Cure on Thursday night. A. Great show and Robert Smith somehow does all the vocals and utilises 5 or 6 guitars as he works his way through 30 plus of his own songs, the man is a genius. No other band has the same sound and in a 40 year career he has never had to contemplate a need to accommodate the latest music fad because the Cure is the Cure I suppose. Anyway I was again blown away by their music just as I was when they last toured here in 2007. What has changed in those 9 years is their audience, the Gothics have gone since 2007 and have been replaced by a large number of younger people with iPhones etc. great nights entertainment.

PDee can you vouch for the canapés at the local Mont Albert Ladies tennis club? I have it on good authority that they are second to none!

DC business never stops as you know. i must drop in to the Mont Albert tennis club to check out the afternoon tea! I am thinking about rebooting my tennis career. Do you think they could use a right hander with a lethal backhand and a big kicking serve?

It has been a sad week with the passing of Lady Susan Renouf, the doyen of Melbourne Society. Of course I attended the farewell with the rest of the who is who of Melbourne society. It was great to catch up with my old University chums Andy Peacock, Bluey Walker, Bobby Doyle and Micky Kroger. And the cream of Melbourne's matrons were there of course to pay their respects It was a marvellous farewell at Saint Andrews Church in Brighton and later on at the reception, well at least until the congenial atmosphere was somewhat sullied by the appearance of an unlikely character who I observed scoffing the canapés, sculling the bubbly and touching up some of the matrons, one of whom shrieked "what are you doing here DC?"

Or me running into my Triad money lenders who I knew nothing about until your recent trip to Asia! But however I have been agile enough to avoid because I am in the FNQ tropics!

BB don't you live bayside? If it goes in the drain it is coming your way! Better off being processed and pre-treated by Moons prior to entering the sewer system to be fully treated at Werribee!

Uncle as you know I am waiting for your paperwork. You know some receipts to verify your excessive expenses in China for a start! Any receipts for expenses We incurred from your Malaysian venture would be a bonus as we never knew you were going there!!!

The outcome of this election is a minor issue for me now. I am reeling from the news that Lois Lane passed away just last Sunday and this a mere 9 months after the passing of Jimmy Olsen! And we lost Lady Penelope and Wilbur Post earlier this year! These are tragic times indeed. Why would I care who will rule this place now?

Moons I think Julia should be setting up a consultancy available to both sides to guide them through the art of negotiation first to form a minority government, then how to work legislation through that circus, called the senate. For all that she was vilified by the conservative press and a clod like Abbott who could not negotiate his way out of a wet paper bag, she was masterful in negotiating legislation through a near hung lower house and a potentially hostile Senate. Although negotiating sensibly with Pauline might be a bridge too far, even for Julia.

BJ I looked at importing bananas from Cuba last year to overcome the darstardly Panama disease but all Cuban bananas bend to the left as you look at them. So they are not straight but both Castro bothers assured me there is no such thing as LGBTI anything in Cuba, it is just Western capitalist propaganda so if it is bent, at least to the left it can also be straight!

Not me. I am currently in FNQ and eating bananas every day and haven't noticed any men looking at me, women yes, men no.

I have been somewhat insensitive as I just realised that today marks the 55 anniversary of Ernest's uhm, err, shall we say untimely death; no wonder he was in no mood for an ale at his own brewery last evening.