Little Goffy

Just quietly, I think Luke Davies-Uniacke is going to be a terrific part of our 2026-2028 three-peat.

So there's a physicist, a chemist and an economist stranded on an island with nothing but a carton of chupa-chups to eat and no way to open them...

Joking, yes?

Brisbane have a draw! Also Essendon and the Crows, but Brisbane is my top candidate, especially with them playing the Magpies in the second-last round just for added drama.

Maybe use a VPN with region unlock and a temporary Kayo subscription?

So many clubs I just wish would let go of the raft and sink into oblivion. Did I use up all my credits cursing West Coast and Hawthorn? Divine favour well spent to be sure, but still, what animal do I need to sacrifice to make Collingwood falter and finish outside the 8 on percentage? Realistically they could lose their last 4 games (Blues, Swans, Lions and finally to us) and in the process give up their spot to a late-surging Lions who also have a draw.

Seems unwise for a near-30-yr-old player out of contract and not getting much done playing at VFL level.

We did it. We broke Geelong. Watching other teams feast on the corpse is a bit like being the leopard which has been harassed off a kill by hyenas, but we did get our meal and the hunt was excellent, too. Geelong likely to be in sixth by the end of the round and out of the 8 by their round 14 bye.

If Netflix had the full coverage of AFL games, I would never need to switch on regular TV again. I mean, sure, I'll miss out on the ads telling me the latest from Farmer Wants a Root and I won't be able to flick over to watch a 2017 rerun of 8 out of 10 Cats does countdown, but all in all, I think I can just about some gaffa tape over the 'TV' button and never regret it. Plus, the movie where they put together the commentary team would be awesome.

A Malthouse to Carlton scenario, you reckon? Or Neeld to Melbourne? As for Martin, I'd argue that our list needs are of the meat and three veg healthy core rather than premium chocolates. Sigh. In a fantasy world if I could steal a rival veteran who might be jack of it at their current club, I'd be looking at the St Kilda Captain. Can you imagine Steele and Viney going in side by side, denying all opponents even a moment of comfort and each doing 120% of the workload of a normal person. The opposition could field a Balrog and still would not be able to pass. I guess that brings me back to the Martin point - we have many young players who are capable of dynamic things but who are still developing the maturity needed for the relentless grind and the composure needed to halt runs of goals. What we need most of all is the reliable core of maturity who can enable those younger guys to really explore their abilities without too much anxiety over inevitable mistakes.

Personally I think Lever is the more natural forward, but for both of them there is the problem that they clearly have a team rule that they aren't allowed to enter the forward 50 even to take a shot on goal.

Sconnes with cream and jam, oh, scohnes with jam and cream?

I just watched the Match Review footage of Darling's collision and while Darling isn't my favourite player (perhaps still just because of the 'mystery tent incident' the Eagles used to nudge him down the draft) it is notable that his instincts as the collision approached was to stall his momentum, turn his hips away from the opponent use his hands as a shock absorber and then immediately show concern. None of it was a major action or sudden convulsion, but also none of it created a focal point of impact. I guess I'm just saying that if it had been Brayden Maynard in Darling's postion, Bytel would be in hospital today. With this in mind, I will suspend habitual hatred and will not be hoping to '186' the Eagles this weekend and will settle for a professional 50 point win that plays a couple of our forwards into form. That said, this is a single-game exemption only and I will be out for annihilation again by round 17.

Careless striking is a cool story.

Oh my... now that's three games in a row with highly visible dives by Carlton players. https://www.foxsports.com.au/afl/match-review-shock-as-cats-star-sanctioned-over-act-great-claimed-was-playing-for-a-free-kick/news-story/4019264312794c2bd1da2d7a62460ab0 Diving is a policy at Carlton.

Meanwhile, the spoonful of sugar of Maynard in distress, while also clear evidence that Carlton have been training for 'dangerous tackle' dives.

I genuinely have no idea what you mean. What do you mean? I think the joke has gone straight over my head.

Premiership solar hot water system with off-peak booster? 44 different local footy clubs with significant improvements to their facilities which would tangibly affect both support and the talent pathway. Or, tacky merchandise for people who fly first class on Emirates.

I've moved on enough to simply acknowledge that our poor start allowed the game to be decided by a combination of insufficient camera resolution and Brodie Kemp cheating. The only solution is to dominate so thoroughly that there's no point even cheating against us.

From Footscray Bulldogs to Flatrack Bullies?

Twice!

1.10.16 10.1.61 Sharing only because I'm struggling with that being reality.

Oh good, Geelong is broken. Not everything in football is bad. I hope Fritta is looking at Cameron's flat run and thinking 'I've got a chance at the Coleman if I dig in hard now'.

Think of it not as losing a potential player, but as gaining a potential extremely wealthy supporter. Also, is there some kind of Stynes genetic condition where they feel compelled to change country?

I have this fantasy where we don't have our four lowest rated players on the ground all be forwards. Even the same 'total effectiveness' across all players would be fine if we can just get one or two of our forwards to have a significant presence each week. At least I feel confident that May can handle Waterman, which is basically the end of the game as far as win-loss goes. (touching wood vigorously)