I’ve never really made New Year’s resolutions but in an attempt to bring some semblance of balance to my life, I’ve decided to alter my approach to the way in which I support my football team.

Earlier in 2008 it seemed to me that the Melbourne Football Club had turned us into a psych ward (my first collective noun creation) of ‘Depressive Pessimists’? Despite my username, I’m exploring alternative footballing medicines. Blind optimism certainly invites disappointment and highlighting positives assists in the breeding of denial. Whilst I wasn’t ready to jump on the bandwagon and join in the carnivorous banquet that some of my fellow Demonlanders enjoyed early last year – you know the one, where David Neitz was the entrée, Dean Bailey the main course and a string of second and third year players the desert, I’ve decided that a more circumspect approach to 2009 is in order.

I’ve always been interested in what makes people the way they are but have spent little time studying psychology. Followers of all football teams have to deal with broad brushstroke generalisations and clichés that provide a shallow representation of their shared character as a supporter group. The upper-crust successful view of Melbourne supporters born in the 50’s and 60’s seems to have been replaced by a fresh perception on our approach to support – one that emphasises frailty and unfaithfulness.

I’ve decided it’s far too simplistic to divide the Melbourne faithful into the two large groups; the ‘optimists’ and the ‘pessimists’. A low profile poster on another site has comically used the expression ‘Strawberry Fields’ to describe the former and others have questioned the commitment and passion of the latter.

I’d like to think that my traditional approach to all things football has been unconditionally positive. Whilst driven, like most around here, by the prospect of a MFC premiership, some of my fellow posters have rightly promoted the importance of enjoying ‘the journey’. This approach to supporting the Dees has helped me remain positive over the years, but sadly the journey has become less enjoyable as other demands and the growing frustration of my new wife have left me questioning the emotional time I continue to invest in a team that seemingly provides so little. As I write these very words, I’m fully aware of the selfishness of this mentality, but who here has never personalised the ongoing failure of this team and club we all purport to support?

Those who are quickly lambasted for their negativity may well be a step ahead of the rest of us in terms of getting a handle on their obsession. Perhaps they’re not ‘depressive pessimists’ but instead ‘defensive pessimists’.

Whilst recently whacking the google (http://www.googlewhacking.com), I discovered that ‘Defensive Pessimism’ is “a strategy used by anxious people to help them manage their anxiety so that they can keep their focus away from emotions, to work with peace and enhance their productivity. Such people usually lower their expectations to help prepare themselves for the worst, then they mentally play through all the bad things possible.” I’ve decided that this ‘Defensive Pessimism’ could be worth a shot. I really, really like the idea of being able to work in a state of peace and enhance my productivity during the times in the year when Melbourne is not playing football. What bliss it must be for those who can travel through an entire day of work without a single thought about the Melbourne Football Club.

A couple of very wise posters on this forum have often suggested that things are never quite as good or as bad as they seem. Traditionally I would have supported this view but now see it as dangerous as it tempts me to ignore the footballing evidence provided by a season that featured 3 wins and 19 losses and instead consider the mouth-watering prospect of a handful of 17 and 18 year olds who will surely be crushed by the burgeoning weight of impatient expectation.

‘Defensive Pessimism’ is my saviour. So here goes. Watts and Morton will fail to adjust to the physical rigours of senior football, Blease will be snapped like a twig the minute he runs onto the MCG, Jetta, Bennell and Jurrah will struggle to adjust to a foreign lifestyle and Bail will find himself out of his division as he adjusts to life away from the AFLQ. Furthermore, I’m no longer dismissing our diabolical run with injuries over the past couple of seasons as pure bad luck, it’s clear proof of the difference between the ‘haves’ and ‘have nots’, Our facilities are poor and our staff dwarfed by the bigger clubs. Our injury curse will continue. McLean, Rivers, Grimes and Sylvia will again struggle to get on the park and our season will be derailed before it’s allowed to get on track. It’s clear that there’s not a sponsor in sight that wants to be associated with a team and a club that the media enjoy taking cheap pot-shots at, highlighting our every deficiency and falling back on easy clichés and ignorant misrepresentations. Our new board will soon run out of ideas and the faithful will be reluctant to dig deep again to pull the club out of the mire. The last 10 boards have failed to come up with a sustainable operation plan, why should this board be any different? The Casey experiment? New training and administrative facilities? All doomed to fail!

Well there you go. I’m feeling less anxious already. It’s amazing, I’m seeing clearly for the first time. Emotion is the root of football supporting evil. It’s easy my friends; take the emotion out of football. It’s a business afterall, that’s what they keep telling us. If you’re feeling a little anxious about the footballing year ahead, don’t despair. Instead, I encourage you to adopt my new footballing doctrine – Defensive Pessimism.

Top read!

I favour the 'optimistic pessimism' approach, sought of like the recession we had to have approach.

Sure we're crap at the moment, but at least it's forced the club to rebuild the list properly.

great post,

but with all the positives that have come out since oct 08 surely we have to be a little optimistic at this point!

I’ve never really made New Year’s resolutions but in an attempt to bring some semblance of balance to my life, I’ve decided to alter my approach to the way in which I support my football team.

"Loyalty, at least in football terms, was not a moral choice like bravery or kindness; it was more like a wart or a hump, something you were stuck with". Nick Hornby "Fever Pitch".

You are familiar with this sentiment, 'Vibes.

Since when did a hunchback have any say over the shape of his hump?

I favour the 'optimistic pessimism' approach, sought of like the recession we had to have approach.

Sure we're crap at the moment, but at least it's forced the club to rebuild the list properly.

the afl is definately not helping us rebuild the list properly though with the introduction of 2 new teams. The natural cycle is being intereupted and we're not going to be given our opportunity with an uncomprimised draft. It really pisses me off that the AFL just goes and changes the rules on us when these rules are just about to help us out. St Kilda, WB, Richmond and Carlton have all had their chance to rebuild over recent years and we're getting done over. I think that we have another year of pain and struggle ahead of us and although options such as Butcher, Scully and Lucas are possibly open to us, players like Blease and Watts may not have been, if the draft concessions came into play in the 2008 draft. Whilst no time is ideal to be at the bottom, i really hope we are not at the bottom at the end of 2010 and beyond because those teams will really be shafted. This interuption to the cycle will put teams back 15-20 years in terms of they will have to wait to start the cycle again. I am hopeful we will be back vying for finals and that elusive premiership and not still at the bottom of the cycle in 2010 and beyond. I do believe the end may not be to far away for the club if that were to be the case.

Going through all the possible worst case scenarios freshens me up a little because they seem less realistic than the prospect of some kind of solution being found.

In particular, the Casey Fields set up makes a huge difference, the quality of the field and arrangements out there is so much better that the scrappy mess we've been dealing with for two long.

And it'll make a huge difference to the supporter base as we develop that City of Casey connection, especially since we're going about it in good, positive ways (specifically the Demon Heartland project, for example). I'll bet that Casey Council is already feeling a bit of relief that they have made a good decision and will be dealing with good people for a long time.

I favour the 'optimistic pessimism' approach, sought of like the recession we had to have approach.

Sure we're crap at the moment, but at least it's forced the club to rebuild the list properly.

Whilst it was an interesting read and out of left field approach by Vibes. I agree with this sentiment by Jarka.

the afl is definately not helping us rebuild the list properly though with the introduction of 2 new teams. The natural cycle is being intereupted and we're not going to be given our opportunity with an uncomprimised draft. It really pisses me off that the AFL just goes and changes the rules on us when these rules are just about to help us out. St Kilda, WB, Richmond and Carlton have all had their chance to rebuild over recent years and we're getting done over. I think that we have another year of pain and struggle ahead of us and although options such as Butcher, Scully and Lucas are possibly open to us, players like Blease and Watts may not have been, if the draft concessions came into play in the 2008 draft. Whilst no time is ideal to be at the bottom, i really hope we are not at the bottom at the end of 2010 and beyond because those teams will really be shafted. This interuption to the cycle will put teams back 15-20 years in terms of they will have to wait to start the cycle again. I am hopeful we will be back vying for finals and that elusive premiership and not still at the bottom of the cycle in 2010 and beyond. I do believe the end may not be to far away for the club if that were to be the case.

Great post hillie. I have felt exactly the same way except that we are the lucky ones. If we have a bad year in 09 i.e., <4 wins we will clean up at draft time. What is the worst thing for us is if we win 5-8 games. So lets assume that we have rebuilt enough the last 2 yrs and 09 will just be a top up with us finising 7th-11th. We will only get better from there.

Nth Melb and Stkilda. Nth is the biggest concern. They have had many good years now and are due for a bad one or two. If this comes b/w 2010-2012 they are in big trouble. i suspect the last board suspected this and combined with poor off field performance - thats why they were looking at GC as they are just not viable. to have money issues when you are going ok has to set alarm bells. Stkilda as well has had many years of "sucess" and with a few of the old guard retiring they too could be looking at some lean years ahead. Who knows by 2011-12 MFC could well be a force in the leauge again!

My tip is the kanga's may well be playing a lot of home games if not all out of tassie by 2020.

the afl is definately not helping us rebuild the list properly though with the introduction of 2 new teams. The natural cycle is being intereupted and we're not going to be given our opportunity with an uncomprimised draft. It really pisses me off that the AFL just goes and changes the rules on us when these rules are just about to help us out. St Kilda, WB, Richmond and Carlton have all had their chance to rebuild over recent years and we're getting done over. I think that we have another year of pain and struggle ahead of us and although options such as Butcher, Scully and Lucas are possibly open to us, players like Blease and Watts may not have been, if the draft concessions came into play in the 2008 draft. Whilst no time is ideal to be at the bottom, i really hope we are not at the bottom at the end of 2010 and beyond because those teams will really be shafted. This interuption to the cycle will put teams back 15-20 years in terms of they will have to wait to start the cycle again. I am hopeful we will be back vying for finals and that elusive premiership and not still at the bottom of the cycle in 2010 and beyond. I do believe the end may not be to far away for the club if that were to be the case.

I disagree, the altered drafts will be in 2010 and onwards and if were still getting number 1 picks then we'll probably be dead anyway. The new teams are going to have very little impact on our rebuilding and in the end the only entity who will stop us from rebuilding is us, like it's been over the last 8 years.

The theory that used to be known as the Reverse Mozz.

i prefer self-defensive pessimism.

that is, i purposely tell myself that we are crap. this stops me from getting my hopes up, when we are actually crap.