Bad Demon Pun

The only positve side of having Bennell in the team is his mildly amusing hair. Expect the him to skirt around packs pick up a mighty 5-6 possessions and perhaps chime in with a goal. I honeslty haven't seen any upside to a Bennell inclusion for some time. Whatever perceived attributes he brings to the team never eventuate. Perhaps he's a nice man, can't say I care though because as a footballer he's a flake.

Only going on his 2012 season thus far he's performing at around B+ level which is infinitely better than any options we have currently. Don't think he's worth more than 450 K though. Averaging around 22 possessions and 6 clearances a game with a fairly low disposal percentage. (This may be due to a lack of support and the role he's playing though).

Nice to stay positive but it's a bit like being told everyone you've ever cared about has died in a plane crash but the airline has decided to give all the surviving family members a small pack of free peanuts. But yah for Bartram and Rivers new found ability to handball instead of kicking to increase their disposal percentage. I wonder if a handball is considered to have it the mark if it goes in the general direction of a teammate, irrespective of whether they're free or not?

True, but the only reason we let Richmond get close enough for him to kick that goal was because every time one of our players was beating his opponent he was moved to the bench or a position he wasn't suited to.

pfft. As if our culture could be any worse without even suggesting tanking. If we threw the game plan out the window I almost feel like we'd be more likely to snatch the occasional hap hazard win. Clearly this list needs a clear out so playing the kids instead of broken down dispirited old nags wouldn't be tanking. The only option would be to play everyone clearly out of position and let's be honest besides Frawley can we clearly say any other Melbourne player truly owns a position? That being said do you remember Mathew Whelan playing in the forward pocket (in his farewelll match mind you) that sad day we coached ourselves to a loss against the tigers. The excuse from Bailey being that he was experimenting with players in different positions. It was embarrassing for the supporters but most of all for the players. Every player who set foot on the MCG that day knew at the end of the day they were coached to lose.

"Surely this is the better option? We don't have a decent small on the list" Dare I mention Alwyn Davey is coming out of contract at the end of the year. Averaging 2.5 goals a game this year and 3-4 tackles a game. Might be a bit old for our "plans" though.

I'd say he probably is slightly overpaid but when a man's dying of dehydration in a desert he's likely to spend that little bit more than retail price for a glass of water.

As a kid I actually came to school on dress up as your future career day as a Mad scientist. I say do it. We'll need some DNA from Mitch, but I can't imagine that should pose too much of a problem. I've got a friend who specialises in "acquiring" things from celebrities. His collection consists of a piece of gum chewed by Anna Kournakova and a towel Bruce Springsteen apparently mopped his sweaty brow with once so I'm pretty sure getting a piece of Mitch shouldn't be too much of a drama.

You said it Clint. I'm an eternal pessimist in most facets of my life but have spent the last 20 years watching Melbourne games irrespective of how poorly we were doing, but recently something really seems to be missing. Aside from the occasional Howe screamer or Tapscott bump there isn't much to enjoy about watching Melbourne play. I honestly hate most sports but have always found football to be visceral and truly majestic on an aesthetic level, but Melbourne this year are un watchable I really don't think I can put myself through it much longer.

As average as Moloney has been this year he's still one of the few midfielders on our list that can actually extract the ball from a stoppage as opposed to simply jumping on it to create another stoppage, I really can't see any reason to drop him. If there was some green midfielder tearing it up in the VFL who's spot he was blocking that would be another story, but can anyone name one? I certainly can't.

No offence to Wojinski but one of those players that always annoyed me. Most probably linked to him being one of those players that as soon as someone hands him the ball the commentators start frothing at the mouth about his speed and dashing runs which is almost always linked to him bursting through the half back line to kick it straight down the oppositions throats. I can hear Bruce now "Scarlett to Wokinksi, Oh you now he's got some speed and there he goes on one of those trademark runs owwghhh grrraaa umm slober etc"

I can't agree more. Martin is faster, stronger and has proven he can hold down a key back position if required. I'm sure I've read somewhere Martin holds the record at Melbourne for Bench presses, plus he was one of the competitions most improved last year. He's been injured this year and is more than deserving of a little faith from the Melbourne unfaithful.

OUT: Sellar (C grade Ruckmen, F grade Forward), Bail (simply not enough presence) In: Pettard (combine this man and Howe at half forward and leave him in for more than 3 games and our forward line will be infinitely less one dimensional) , Watts (I'd take Martin if fit but he's not. Hawthorn don't exactly have a stellar ruck line up and even on a bad day can't be 1/2 as bad as Sellar as a forward)

Don't think Scarlett has matched up on a first choice power forward in some time now. More likely to play off a Dunn or similar type.

Well I was being facetious I obviously don't believe Neeld would take any notice of my ramblings. I do however have to disagree with you. Bennell has proven time and time again he just can't get the ball and whilst I like Tapscotts bull at a gate approach he hasn't consistently been able to even crack double figures with his possession count (hopefully this is due to injury and lack of match fitness). Blease I'm hoping will develop but he doesn't have the foot skills or we simply haven't seen them and Tynan seems to fit more into the Grimes mould and at this early stage (which is probably too early to judge) and his kicking does look suspect.

As a first time poster I am more than happy to go out on a limb, open myself up to ridicule and say move Colin Sylvia to the half back line permanently. Yes our midfield would be better served in the short term with him as a permanent fixture and even my strange friend who hates football and lurks in his room singing sea shanties and drinking cask wine knows that Melbourne needs an injection of class into it's midfield, but as time has proven he's not really that much chop unless you want to beat up on Richmond or Port. Yes he has much value in the forward line, but considering the ball goes in there about as often as children feel compelled to hug Tony Abbott I feel he'd be left with too much time to try and find the meaning of life hidden in Mitch Clarkes Tattoos. So why the back line you ask? It's not exactly being pessimistic to assume we are going to get pantsed in the midfield for the foreseeable future which results in the the back line being perpetually bombarded and whilst Frawley, Grimes, Rivers and Garland are admirable spoils, interceptors and solid citizens none of them bar Frawley on occasion can hit the ground with their own spit. Whilst Sylvia isn't exactly Luke Hodge I can't see any reason he couldn't at least pull of a B grade impersonation of him. He has good burst speed and can break lines and tackles. Is very strong in the air for his size and reasonably courageous. He tackles like a man much in need of some love and affection and most importantly he can kick long and accurately. I'm sure Mark Neeld follows this site and suggestions made by football ignorants like myself very seriously so expect the change to happen tomorrow against the Cats and watch as we finally see Sylvia deliver on all that potential.

As a first time poster I am more than happy to go out on a limb, open myself up to ridicule and say move Colin Sylvia to the half back line permanently. Yes our midfield would be better served in the short term with him as a permanent fixture and even my strange friend who hates football and lurks in his room singing sea shanties and drinking cask wine knows that Melbourne needs an injection of class into it's midfield, but as time has proven he's not really that much chop unless you want to beat up on Richmond or Port. Yes he has much value in the forward line, but considering the ball goes in there about as often as children feel compelled to hug Tony Abbott I feel he'd be left with too much time to try and find the meaning of life hidden in Mitch Clarkes Tattoos. So why the back line you ask? It's not exactly being pessimistic to assume we are going to get pantsed in the midfield for the foreseeable future which results in the the back line being perpetually bombarded and whilst Frawley, Grimes, Rivers and Garland are admirable spoils, interceptors and solid citizens none of them bar Frawley on occasion can hit the ground with their own spit. Whilst Sylvia isn't exactly Luke Hodge I can't see any reason he couldn't at least pull of a B grade impersonation of him. He has good burst speed and can break lines and tackles. Is very strong in the air for his size and reasonably courageous. He tackles like a man much in need of some love and affection and most importantly he can kick long and accurately. I'm sure Mark Neeld follows this site and suggestions made by football ignorants like myself very seriously so expect the change to happen tomorrow against the Cats and watch as we finally see Sylvia deliver on all that potential.