Tarax Club

So close but so far away. Attending tennis AM “she who must be obeyed” would not be impressed if.your top end correspondents ‘slipped away’ to pre-season?

With all this off-season eulogising and "monster" myth making about the new recruits in particular Brandon Preuss, well before the advent of the real stuff. When will the hype actually meet the reality or the reality meet the hype? Seems more than a whiff of bathwater out there post 2018. 6 drops of the essence of terror 5 drops of sinister sauce ... ... and now for a tincture of tenderness because without a touch of tenderness it might deestroy me oops too much!

Don't mean to be nitpicking! Birds of a feather have been known to flock together! Is that Sparrowhawk or has the SSP trigger being activated already and and an unloved Swallow made his way to the coop?

If young Toby is a patch on his namesake Peter Bedford. Brownlow medalist with the South Melbourne Swans, way back in the halcyon VFL days (some here may recall the Lakeside oval). He will be a most worthy recruit. Of course that is a very big “if”.

Has Freddie Clutterbuck nominated this draft?

Back at the very beginning of the John Northey Dreamtime! Have a distant memory of attending the opening match of the season at the “G” versus the tiges on that very hot late March Saturday arvo. Remember the win but the rest of is decidedly hazy. Of course sufficient cold ‘refreshment’ was necessary even in the shade of the old Southern stand to maintain adequate hydration levels that day. The video bears testament to players endurance and ultimate determination to win, qualities that Swoopers’ teams were rarely short of. Prior to the arrival of the professional era players maintained regular weekday employment or study. According to footy folklore, Ted Fidge who was a plumber by trade kept weights in his van, so if the opportunity arose he could do extras at the worksite. Ted did not possess the footy IQ or skills of Alan Johnson, Brian Wilson or Gary Lyon so he was not regularly selected for the firsts. Fast forward a few seasons to VFL Park Waverley on a dark wintry day. Faux magpie enforcer Darren Millane whacked Ted, who duly retaliated with a fearsome right jab which had the birdies singing and once powerful thighs reduced to liquorice legs. Unfortunately for Ted the live audience was considerably larger than TV ringside and the incident was in the centre of the play. Northey’s team discipline mantra was breached, the runner delivered the coach’s instruction, Ted left the field where he spent the rest of the afternoon on the bench. After serving what must have been an extended suspension.Ted never again played in the seniors, he was delisted at the end of the season.

Six of the best!

Of course just over the border is the “big banana”?. The local forest dwellers have been known to worship there. It seems recently discovered archaeological evidence exists of arcane if not bizarre ritualistic practices that go back centuries. Apparently these indigenes now known to anthropologists as ‘tourists’ initially formed a somewhat obscure provincial cult which grew exponentially over time to become almost pandemic in its appeal. Hence the expression ‘an old banana was once young and green’.

His pedigree suggests he has some definite 'mongrel' about him . Hopefully that can be positively channeled as controlled aggression on field. Attack the opposition offensively from the fullback position all the way downfield.

Trust it wasn't a dodgy echo beach cab merlot!

Bring back Thorpie!

and so ends today's lesson... Give them hell Demons!!!

Saved a certain goal in a very tight preliminary final contest with a goal square intercept. Has determination and courage in spades reminiscent of Sean Wight. Go Well young Smithy!

JB top summation overall, team performance improved markedly after half time as did many individual performances. Suggest alternative -Tyson teases again?

Our team! Our town! Our turf! Our youth! Our future! Go dees!!!

Going stir crazy here (almost) confined with a audio link behind four walls no this is not porridge (Italia Milano) it will definitely be black label tonight (tarax of course!) Gloria! Viva! Amore! Diablo!

The Revolution is nigh the crowd is yelling for more... The ancien regime off with their heads! All the way with the red and the blue!!!

Your intrepid correspondents reporting from the very far ‘top end’ (Sparta Greece) It is all in the lap of the gods. Team will hopefully take inspiration from the locals when famously confronting the Persians pussycats at Thermopylae ‘G’. No problem with Robbie Walls the oracle at Deelphi has cast his bones...

Agree Nasher, only able to listen to (AFL nation) webcast from afar...(on the the grand tour Athens) Robert Walls praised Jay Kennedy-Harris for winning a one on one contest with quote ‘courage and will’. Robbie seems to be a a bit of a fan and has mentioned JKH in dispatches previously. Detractors need to take their blinkers off rather than dwell in a negative self-indulgent universe of their own creation, without the grace of conceding maybe the young bloke can play and make a positive contribution to team success. Fortunately the Match selection committee make the team selection decisions which appear to be based on fair and rational parameters. Great if Jay gets a finals gig with the first 22! Super pleased about the team performance, may the momentum continue to roll on. ‘[censored] hang on to your ? ‘s!!!

D Day Do it Dees!

With more than a nod to the great Chuck Berry Somebody help me get out of August. Just help me get to final’s town. And I woke up high over AFL headquarters. On a jet to the promised land. Swing low chariot come down easy. Cut your engines and cool your wings. And let me make it to the telephone. Tell the folks back home this is the promised land callin’. And say the poor ‘d’ boy is on the line. Waiting for the dees to come home...

No, keeping with the Roman despotic theme Pinot Nero. Great drop intend to try amore! Cheers

Buongiorno, with mention of Caligula your top end correspondents cannot resist. At present holidaying in Italia and on the march south to Roma. Wi-Fi here is decidedly sketchy so when there is on opportunity we will take it. From reports the attrition rate continues as the season goes, with a few more casualties on the wayside. Shame about Smithy mi dispiace, after showing some definite promise. From the brief viewing of the match highlights the tackle causing his injury appeared overly et tu Brutus and worthy of the Colosseum and Bernie's on the backburner with Casey again... Mi scusi must remain relevant and on topic. Charlie Spargo excites your roving correspondents as a worthy addition to the Demons legion who 'jack in the box' (apologies to our co-captain) like appears front and square for that opportunist goal. Doesn't shirk the physical stuff either in the heat of gladiatorial combat. From where we're sitting, like Caligula thumbs up the mighty Demons, thumbs down to Equinus and his cohort this Sunday. Arrivederci. postscript If we run into Jake we will say ciao!!!

Binnie, keeping strictly in the spirit of Joeboy's 3 word player analysis there is little opportunity for flexibility or balance in a 3 word comment. In general it is either probably going to be a bouquets or brickbats. My perception of Oscar's performance was he was under some duress from young Schache in the first half, who was providing the bullies with a target going forward, as evident by the number of his positive play involvements. Agree, in the second half Sam Frost appeared to be his minder and his influence on the game waned as it did for a number of players in the bullies team. Was the switch of Schache's opponent in the second half orchestrated from the coach's box? Perhaps the coach should be applauded for this move and other tactics that turned the game in the Dees favour! To be fair Oscar did make a positive contribution to the team performance as he does most weeks, but given the constrictions of this format perhaps his Ying needed greater Yang.

After some contemplation! Jones - off the boil Hogan - positioning advantaged team Tom McDonald - signs are positive Garlett - confidence is returning Neal-Bullen - ball handling improved Spargo - spark and go Hannan - upgrade goal GPS Lewis - positives outweigh negatives Melksham - dribble wizard extraordinaire Oliver - champion player now Petracca - damaging 3rd quarter Fritsch - kid is clean Vince - some blooper handballs Brayshaw - sublime midfield playmaker Frost - keep it simple Gawn - dominant big man Harmes - blue collar ethic Hibberd - smell the roses Jetta - courageous pack mark Kennedy-Harris - JKH KPI CIP Oscar McDonald - opponent gave grief Salem - smooth and combative