Skuit

Can't believe this is really happening. 2019! I'll be comfortable with a 35 point win considering we're underdone. Otherwise I'm tearing up the joint. Also, can someone help me with the time difference - do I really have to wake up at/not go till bed till 4am to watch from Europe?

Also a shout out to Jack Watts and Jesse Hogan. Who once again demonstrated to the AFL that it doesn't need to manufacture off-season interest through one-month trade weeks and grand final time-slot speculation when it has twenty-something year-old blokes as its prime commodity.

MFCSS: Obstructed vision = blinder.

I've called Billy out before for not having the aptitude for AFL - especially with respect our playing style - but his return last year in Darwin was impressive enough to make me reconsider my position. The emergency list of Preuss, Petty and Keilty suggests that we're not intending to bring another mid/small regardless of the circumstances, and I think Sparrow's inclusion can be considered in line with the rewards system we've used in the past. As such, and with other injuries, it's not clear how far down the pecking order Stretch truly is - and he may very well be the next-in-line mid, ahead of KK, JKH and Maynard (but presumably behind AVB). Too early to be calling it cross-roads.

Love how Demonland has turned the Melbourne fans' penchant for jumping at shadows into a literal art form.

But I wish they wouldn't mess around. Even just seeing Jordan Lewis's name in print next to Robbie Gray's in a forward pocket makes me break out in cold sweats.

A noted innovator, Hinkley takes the concept of chaos ball to a whole new level. All up, the Power will have 11 changes to the team that lost to Essendon in round 23 last year. "It makes it hard for Melbourne to predict what we're going to do, because we don't know what we're going to do."

Hawthorn does the Kokoda trail to build up leadership qualities. Collingwood just recruits those who survived the MFC pre-2014. Much smarter from a logistics perspective.

Firstly, how exactly do you conduct a fitness test on a fractured cheekbone? Secondly, I'm happy to volunteer my time if they need any help performing the test.

Fair enough. I suppose signing Jay on deadline day suggests he wasn't our first option, and as such there's a natural sense of disappointment that we missed out on something else. This of course might not be case.

The club hasn't done much to sell this pick. Last day of bidding: “The AFL introduced a Supplementary Selection Period for the first time this year. This allowed teams to add players to their rookie list up until todays date,” General Manager of Football Operations Josh Mahoney told Melbourne Media. And rather than having some wild untapped potential, we happened to know his name: “When we were considering how to use this position on our list, it made sense to add a player who knew our system and had played under our coaches.” Underwhelmed accordingly.

D'land just got juicy.

They've actually now discovered six different muscles unique to Jack Viney.

But so what happened? Did the Yanks revise the prognosis after his sojourn there?

Any chance this is meant to read 2 to 6?

Cheers Cards, a good thing we have experience with Frost's previous 2-18 toe injury.

So as most of us are aware, Lever didn't play in that game. How did his prognosis stretch out so dramatically without any other official word from the club? Could the 12 - 16 weeks be an error, or is there a secondary source?

Can someone explain what happened to Lever's prognosis being pushed out to another potential 15 weeks? Is it in the news or another thread somewhere? I thought he was due back around Round 5/6, with everything going swimmingly except for that minor recent scrape?

With Lever and Frost now parked in the garage for Round 1, I find it extra fitting we've brought in Jaguar as our primary sponsor.

I reckon the tribunal threads are possibly the most demented on here outside of the no-go game-day efforts - including most of the one-off reactionary post-loss flare-ups, is 'Goodwin the right guy?' withstanding. Good job team.

Haha. May suspended in his first outing with the MFC. We need a more gangland look for our logo.

Write to deadline and word-count and 'it's understood' is a valuable journalistic loophole. Although the available resources and second-hand reports suggest that Melbourne have hired or intend to hire five new people in its membership department, it can't yet be confirmed if there are already five new people employed or if one of the positions is still being interviewed for. Further, one of the new people shares a name with an employee who has previously worked in the club canteen, and as such may be an internally transferred employee rather than new one. The Melbourne Football has not replied to a request for comment.

The European petanque circuit has also been rocked by recent drug allegations. Interestingly, the suggestion of a recreational drug being performance enhancing. https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/jan/15/petanque-drug-allegations-cocaine-belgian-players

It's like an abstract quiz: how do you thematically get from Jesse Hogan to Victor Furtwangler in four steps via homosexuality in Hollywood and the television show Spicks & Specks? Next challenge: Victor Furtwangler back to Jesse Hogan via Spongebob Squarepants and a block of cheddar cheese.

Jaguar alongside an auto-insurer hehe.